# Too old to be smitten! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 31, 2015, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446 "2015-03-31T20:22:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2015, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446/21 "2015-04-01T14:36:16Z")
> [@HoneyBadgerDC](#): > > The thought I keep entertaining that I couldn’t bring myself to express in the OP is that I keep thinking about an affair once a year for 3 days. That [rings a bell](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Same_Time,_Next_Year_%28film%29)… ---
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2015, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446/22 "2015-04-01T15:23:13Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > That [rings a bell](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Same_Time,_Next_Year_%28film%29)… I was divorced in 1990, I moved out of the house on July 3rd, July 4th I went to a local bar and ran into a girl I had dated a couple of times in high school. We hit it off pretty well and she had recently seperated as well. We ended up spending the weekend together and when we parted ways agreed to meet in the same bar 20 years later. In 2010 we both showed up, I was really surprised she had remembered. We had nice evening at the bar and have stayed in touch and remained good friends since. ---
**Author:** ![jayrey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/47e85d/32.png) [@jayrey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayrey)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2015, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446/23 "2015-04-01T16:21:56Z")
> [@MoonMoon](#): > > Well, no, I think there’s a good chance that’s a large part of this story. A bad relationship that you feel trapped in could very well cause you to project your desires onto this (conveniently, for the sake of daydreaming) mostly unavailable woman. Crushes are about fantasy, and when our reality sucks, fantasy becomes infinitely more appealing. > > My two cents? Put your mental energy into fixing your current situation, whether that means getting out of your relationship or mending it, and you may find yourself either out of smit, or in a better position to do something about it. This, absolutely, **HoneyBadgerDC** , is the best way to proceed. You haven’t been happy in your current relationship for some time, IIRC. Is it time to do something concrete about that? You have my support, of course, whatever you decide to do but I vote for mending or ending the current relationship before pursuing the other lovely lady. ---
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2015, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446/24 "2015-04-01T16:34:21Z")
> [@jayrey](#): > > This, absolutely, **HoneyBadgerDC** , is the best way to proceed. You haven’t been happy in your current relationship for some time, IIRC. Is it time to do something concrete about that? You have my support, of course, whatever you decide to do but I vote for mending or ending the current relationship before pursuing the other lovely lady. I absolutely agree, when things are going good I very much enjoy my current relationship. When her drinking gets out of hand I can feel myself just getting angrier and angrier every time she opens her mouth slurring and mumbling, it just drives me nuts. There is no fixing my current relationship. After several years of setting her up in apts and recovery homes I finaly just gave up and resigned myself to making the best of it. I actually do have a pretty good life but it could be a lot better. ---
**Author:** ![Boogly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Boogly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boogly)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2015, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446/25 "2015-04-01T16:42:29Z")
One last thought, I hope that neither of us is ever to old to be smitten. It is totally stupid but it can be stupidly awesome. ---
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2015, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446/26 "2015-04-01T16:45:05Z")
> [@Boogly](#): > > One last thought, I hope that neither of us is ever to old to be smitten. It is totally stupid but it can be stupidly awesome. I wish we had a “like” button on here. ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2015, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446/27 "2015-04-01T17:42:39Z")
Life’s too short, **HoneyBadger**. You’re a good guy and I wish you happiness. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2015, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446/28 "2015-04-01T18:15:07Z")
> [@Boogly](#): > > One last thought, I hope that neither of us is ever to old to be smitten. It is totally stupid but it can be stupidly awesome. I’m lightly smitten on a regular basis, and have been all my life. My current [smiter](http://tvcontract.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Nina-Mehlhaf%C2%A0.jpg) (a local newscaster). No stalking, no obsession, just the occasional lustful thinking. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2015, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446/29 "2015-04-01T18:23:33Z")
> [@Boogly](#): > > One last thought, I hope that neither of us is ever to old to be smitten. It is totally stupid but it can be stupidly awesome. My father-in-law got smitten at 96 or so, and still more or less is at 99. (She is a bit older.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/too-old-to-be-smitten/716446.md?page=1)