# Top 10 questions to ask an alien…

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [October 10, 2002, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640 "2002-10-10T07:56:28Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/1 "2002-10-10T07:56:28Z")

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Have been reading Carl Sagans’ _“The Demon Haunted World”_ recently.

He mentions that, occasionally, he receives a letter from someone who claims to be in touch with aliens. He is requested to “ask them anything”.  
As the ‘aliens’ should be very advanced, he generally asks things like “Please provide a short proof of Fermat’s Last Therom”.

He never gets an answer. 😉

He also says it’s a stimulating exercise to think of questions no human today knows the answer to, but also that the correct answer would immediately be recognised as such.

So, who can provide a question that would fit this criteria, to ask our alien?

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**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 8:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/2 "2002-10-10T08:01:14Z")

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So, Laagnork, how are _ypu_ doin’?

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**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 10:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/3 "2002-10-10T10:40:47Z")

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\<resists the ~gry question\>

I suppose questions about the dimensional nature of the universe and whether the forces can all be unified would be nice.

Since the person is presumably either physically meeting the alien or telecommunicating somehow, it would also be nice to ask either ‘In detail, how did you get here?’ or ‘how are you able to exchange information instantaneously over great distances?’

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**Author:** ![ralphthemuppet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f07891/32.png) [@ralphthemuppet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralphthemuppet)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/4 "2002-10-10T11:19:17Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Aro \*  
> **He also says it’s a stimulating exercise to think of questions no human today knows the answer to, but also that the correct answer would immediately be recognised as such.**

I suppose with some of the world’s ‘greatest’ minds pondering over whether we live in a uni or multiverse and what constitutes the ultimate theory, some help on this would be appreciated.

Personally I’d like to know where all my odd socks go and why belly button fluff is blue.

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**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/5 "2002-10-10T11:26:39Z")

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I’d ask for their take on religion. Do they know if there’s a supreme being?

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**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/6 "2002-10-10T11:47:53Z")

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If they answered “yes” to that question, would it be immediately apparent it was true? Would you automatically believe?

What I’m getting at, or looking for, is a question for which the answer couldn’t be faked by a human, and it, once answered, would not be open for interpretation by others. A question that would definitively prove the vastly superior intelligence of the aliens.

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**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/7 "2002-10-10T11:51:08Z")

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I’d want evidence.

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**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/8 "2002-10-10T11:54:47Z")

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One question, one answer. The answer has to be your evidence, and all the evidence you (and anyone else) would ever need.

(Ok, so I’m making this up as I go along…;))

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**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/9 "2002-10-10T11:59:21Z")

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Okay, to rephrase:

“Prove to me the existence, or the non-existence, of any supreme being.”

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**Author:** ![Urban\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Urban\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urban_Ranger)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/10 "2002-10-10T12:04:11Z")

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Ask the alien about a question such as, “How should the quantum theory of gravity be formulated?”

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**Author:** ![ralphthemuppet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f07891/32.png) [@ralphthemuppet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralphthemuppet)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/11 "2002-10-10T12:32:24Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Urban Ranger \*  
> \*\*Ask the alien about a question such as, “How should the quantum theory of gravity be formulated?” \*\*

Is the physics/mathematical community not nearly there through the application of string theory?

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**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/12 "2002-10-10T12:50:49Z")

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You people have to read a short story from the 1950s (the era of pithy sf shorts). It was by Fredric Brown (or possibly Robert Sheckley), and I believe it was called “Question”.

Human beings find a supercomputer among the ruins of a dead civilization. It’s still working, and it can and will answer any question you give it. So people (having taught it English) start asking all the “impossible” and unanswered questions about God and Cosmology and Quantum theory.  
And they can’t understand the answers.

All the answers come in terms of _other_ ideas and questions that people don’t know, so they have to ask questions about _those_. After a lot of asking, they still don’t understand the answers. It reminds me of my experience in a lot of physics and math courses. The killer is, of course, the final line in the story:

“In order to ask the correct question, you must already know most of the answer.”

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**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/13 "2002-10-10T12:51:39Z")

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Is this a one on one meeting with an alien, or strickly through letters, because it would take on a completely different turn. For example, in a one on one meeting, I’m pretty sure my first question would be:

“DO YOOOUU SPEAK EEENGGGLISHHHH?!?!” I mean, you have to say it loud and slow, otherwise they won’t understand you, right?

Then I’d like to know what the deal is with all the anal probing. I mean, at the last BatDope, we pretty much concluded it had to be something to do with high school biology for aliens. We disect frogs, they check out bums. But it could just be they’re big ass freaks, so who knows?

Then I’d like to know how they manage to make their ships fly and move so fast.

Then I’d ask them if they could build me a flying car.

Then there’s the question of “How much?” or “Why not?” depending on their answer.

Then I’d like to know why they hadn’t bothered to make their presence here known before now in a more grand scale.

Do they understand how the universe works and where it came from/how it started?

What are their “religious/spiritual” beliefs?

“You’re not here to suck out my brain or impregnate me or anything, are you?”

“Cand we visit your place? I mean, you’ve already seen my planet, it’s only fair.”

“If you could be any type of fruit, what would you be?”

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**Author:** ![gex\_gex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/94ad74/32.png) [@gex\_gex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gex_gex)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/14 "2002-10-10T12:57:49Z")

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You’re walking through the woods one dark night, all alone, when a creature of some sort approaches you.

What is it?

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**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/15 "2002-10-10T13:03:01Z")

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The conversation with the alien takes place through a third-party with psychic communicative powers.

Any one of those questions could be palmed off with existing human knowledge, and would not lead to quantifiable proof of the existence of the alien. The communication could still be a scam.

We need to ask something totally verfiable, but unknown to the human race, as yet.

A definitive proof of **Goldbach Conjecture** , for example. Would this be enough?

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**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/16 "2002-10-10T13:18:46Z")

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Are you here to remove the implant? I hope so, 'cause it itches like hell.

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**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/17 "2002-10-10T13:24:33Z")

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\*\*WHERE’S THE BEEF?? \*\* 😃

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**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/18 "2002-10-10T13:31:22Z")

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How much does Elvis weigh now?

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**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/19 "2002-10-10T13:34:29Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Aro \*  
> **The conversation with the alien takes place through a third-party with psychic communicative powers.**

Fair enough, but I’d still like to know how this information transfer is possible without violating that reference frame thingy.

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**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640/20 "2002-10-10T13:40:53Z")

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Make that _alleged_ psychic powers.

The question is to be such that it definitively proves the existence of the alien on the other end of the ether, communicating with / through the medium.  
(Or maybe the alien is in Nepal and only the medium has its mobile number.)

(Damn you all!!! I _was_ hoping for a rational, scientific, sensible answer to this. No one is taking my question seriously…;))

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-10-questions-to-ask-an-alien/131640.md?page=2)
