# Top the previous poster's insult. **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [November 2, 2008, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677 "2008-11-02T04:27:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/1 "2008-11-02T04:27:48Z")
\*\*No names, please. The point isn’t to fight; it’s to exercise your vocabulary and imagination. I’ll start things off with a softball: You, madam, are sheer, unadulterated, puppy-kicking, kitten-raping, mongoose-barbecuing evil. Lex Luthor, upon getting reports of your activities, regularly finds himself shuddering in horror and hiding under the covers until you’re finished. The only reason you have lived so long is that Heaven obviously cannot accept you and Hell fears you’ll stink up the place. Next? ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/2 "2008-11-02T04:34:01Z")
Your mother spawned with a rabid pus-dripping goat, you excrement of a diseased drooling rat. No? ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/3 "2008-11-02T04:49:08Z")
Palin supporter! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/4 "2008-11-02T04:50:44Z")
You’re ugly. Well, it worked when I was four. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/5 "2008-11-02T04:51:21Z")
You foul harpy, you putrescent sack of crap, you verminferious fucknugget. You have the social grace of a flaming turd. Your odor and looks aren’t much better. The foul acid spewing out your mouth is only matched by the bile dribbling from your gangrenous cunthole. I’d tell you to fuck off and die but who am I kidding? Nobody is insane enough to fuck you, and death is too easy compared to the lifetime of painful burning anguish that a bitch like you deserves. I hope someday they name a new disease after you, you fucking bitch. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/6 "2008-11-02T04:57:47Z")
You are the misbegotten love child of Dick Cheney and Ann Coulter. ---
**Author:** ![Civil\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d78d45/32.png) [@Civil\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Civil_Guy)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/7 "2008-11-02T04:57:52Z")
Pfah. You’re not worth noticing. I shall stop noticing you immediately. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/8 "2008-11-02T04:59:21Z")
Is that the best you can do, you pathetic goat-raping reprobate? ---
**Author:** ![Khan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3ab097/32.png) [@Khan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khan)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/9 "2008-11-02T05:29:08Z")
Wanna know a secret? Last night your mom told me that you were conceived anally. ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/10 "2008-11-02T05:35:39Z")
No wonder your mother is pro-choice. ---
**Author:** ![EpicNonsense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c37758/32.png) [@EpicNonsense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EpicNonsense)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/11 "2008-11-02T05:42:41Z")
You’re excessive self-stimulation is not excusable as an alternative to religious exercise. You do not possess the hand of God. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/12 "2008-11-02T05:44:56Z")
Your ears aren’t level. ---
**Author:** ![Jaade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dfb087/32.png) [@Jaade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaade)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/13 "2008-11-02T05:46:55Z")
Can’t say the insults get much better than those contained in this [classic](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=306209). > [@Euthanasiast](#): > > […]You fucking pickled hag! You putrid, rusty, cum dumpster! > > […]And then the next night after your promises to the girls? Second verse, same as the first, bitch. Just another round of drink guzzling and balls-deep, cunt-flap-bashing Olympics with some guy who was resourceful enough to comment in the bar on how enchanting your blue eyes were. We both know they are brown, but why hold that against the guy when your root-weary vagina would do? > > […]Look, I know your life is complicated. I mean, it must be a real bitch having your gag reflex bashed in by some loser’s cock ring night after night. > > […]What else are you going to blame me for? Will it be my fault when your meat curtains drag behind you like a fucking bridal train? Will it be my fault when you die from some fucking unfathomable sexually transmitted disease that was formed from the ball-sack-bouillabaisse-C(r)ock-Pot you call a vagina? Will it be my fault when your daughters high-tail it out of town to get away from the rumors spreading like wildfire that their mother is so nasty that her crabs bungee jump from her tampon string? > > […]Forget that you ever knew me, you human sump. Forget my number and my name just as you have your dignity. Forget about pinning the blame anywhere but someplace where it takes a mirror to get it on straight. And the next time two fellas are using you for a human rotisserie, and the guy in the ‘back door’ pulls out because of some discomfort and investigates your colon only to find a class ring, a half a pack of Rollo’s, and a note that says, “You’re getting warmer!”, and in his disgust dives out the fucking window to his death leaving the other guy to decide if he wants to finish up or puke on your face, do not take so much as a nanosecond to even think about blaming me for any of it. > > […]Fuck you with a backwards porcupine for keying my car. > Fuck you with a flaming 747 for filing false police reports in a vain attempt to get me arrested. > Fuck you with a polar bear after being jerked off with a fistful of fish hooks for stalking my family and my new girlfriend (who is now my wife). > Fuck you with your daddy’s dentures for trying to get me fired from a job I held for nine years by calling the CEO of the fucking company and making up lies. > Fuck you with a rabid, pregnant wolverine (after being shown pictures of your vagina then beaten) for forging my signature on credit card applications and leaving my score in ruins. > Fuck you with a flaming copy of **War and Peace** for attempting to use cunt for currency in an attempt to have me killed. > Fuck you with a lit Molotov cocktail for the countless terroristic threats. > Fuck you with a cheese grater dipped in battery acid for turning your children into emotional basket cases. > > You got another DUI? Couldn’t have happened to a nicer person, you fucking jiz-guzzling, monkey-spunk junkie! I hope the judge locks you up, and breaks the key off in the lock! > > Worthless cunt. ---
**Author:** ![Sunrazor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sunrazor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunrazor)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/14 "2008-11-02T06:10:25Z")
Yeah, I remember that one. It’s a bitch having to follow one of the finest, but here goes: You conservative. You John-Wayning, cheap damn Robert Mitchum wannabe. You McCain-loving, Palin-lusting, gun-toting Cheney apologist. You’d lick the shoes on John Birch’s dead body and polish them with your eyebrows just to have a chance to smell Rush Limbaugh’s underarm sweat. I swear, you probably masturbate just thinking about Hillary Clinton giving Bill O’Reilley a blow job for five bucks in the alley behind Rupert Murdoch’s office. You have photoshopped nude photos of Ann Coulter riding James Dobson’s rigid dick while Karl Rove flagellates them with shredded copies of the U.S. Constitution. You make me sick! ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/15 "2008-11-02T06:13:31Z")
“Yes, President Bush.” ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_fight\_the\_hypothetical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/59ef9b/32.png) [@Don\_t\_fight\_the\_hypothetical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_fight_the_hypothetical)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/16 "2008-11-02T06:20:52Z")
> [@Sunrazor](#): > > You … cheap damn Robert Mitchum wannabe… Ouch! You are lower than the 24 testicles of the disciples of Christ. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/17 "2008-11-02T15:53:04Z")
You’re so frigid the furnace kicks on every time you spread your legs. Ketchup eater! ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/18 "2008-11-02T15:59:01Z")
You have the intelligence of a small soap dish. ---
**Author:** ![jali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecae2f/32.png) [@jali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jali)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/19 "2008-11-02T16:01:25Z")
You Cheneyesque excuse for a mavericky human being. ---
**Author:** ![chacoguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/50afbb/32.png) [@chacoguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chacoguy)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2008, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677/20 "2008-11-02T16:57:36Z")
You are the lowest of the feculent slime this campaign season has produced. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-insult/470677.md?page=2)