# Top the previous poster's ridiculous threat **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 17, 2009, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791 "2009-08-17T23:34:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Mr.Miskatonic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.miskatonic/32/310_2.png) [@Mr.Miskatonic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Miskatonic)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/41 "2009-08-18T16:09:48Z")
I will drink your milkshake. ---
**Author:** ![garygnu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garygnu/32/2924_2.png) [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/42 "2009-08-18T16:14:41Z")
I’ll use a nail gun on your knuckles. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/43 "2009-08-18T16:17:48Z")
I will cause your groin to implode and explode simultaneously. No. They will not cancel each other out. ---
**Author:** ![Wargamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/df705f/32.png) [@Wargamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wargamer)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/44 "2009-08-18T16:24:55Z")
I will erase every trace of your existence from our time line. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/45 "2009-08-18T16:39:49Z")
I swear to god I will rip your balls off and jam them so far down your throat that if you were as stupid as you look you’d think you just impregnated yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/46 "2009-08-18T17:55:06Z")
> [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > If you don’t drop your sword this instant, I will cut off your feet below the ankles, then your hands at the wrists. Next your nose. The next thing you lose will be your left eye, followed by the right. Your ears you keep, and I’ll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish, every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out: “Dear God, what is that thing?” will echo in your perfect ears. That is what “to the pain” means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery, forever. > > And I’ll do it, too. Don’t think I won’t. I was thinking the same quote. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/47 "2009-08-18T18:02:25Z")
I reserve my sympathy for the poor police officer, fire fighter or EMT who finds your body. They will wind up drilling holes in their own skull to release the images that continually torture them from that day. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/48 "2009-08-18T18:10:25Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > I am going to lock you in a room with **Rand Rover.** Dude, that’s harsh. ---
**Author:** ![mauxlicious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/bc8723/32.png) [@mauxlicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mauxlicious)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/49 "2009-08-18T18:11:25Z")
Pfft! I’ll steal and assume your identity, murder Cecil Adams and have you BANNED for eternity! ---
**Author:** ![filling\_pages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b9bd4f/32.png) [@filling\_pages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filling_pages)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/50 "2009-08-18T19:00:09Z")
I’ll rip off your face and wear it over mine to an ugly party! ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/51 "2009-08-18T19:27:30Z")
I’ll kill you, then take your DNA, clone you, and kill your clones. ---
**Author:** ![Kickback\_Joe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/cdc98d/32.png) [@Kickback\_Joe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kickback_Joe)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/52 "2009-08-18T19:31:05Z")
I will find and take you back to that moment in time when you were the most depressed and emotionally broken you have ever been. Once there I will stop time so that you are imprisoned in that moment for the rest of miserable existance. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/53 "2009-08-18T19:32:51Z")
Grrr! I’ll _ **over-flamboyant** _ :mad:😉 you to death! ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/54 "2009-08-18T19:59:22Z")
> [@mr. Miskatonic](#): > > i will drink your milkshake. drink it up! ---
**Author:** ![Swallowed\_My\_Cellphone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@Swallowed\_My\_Cellphone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swallowed_My_Cellphone)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/55 "2009-08-18T20:06:40Z")
Knock it off or I’ll give your phone number to Amy Winehouse. ---
**Author:** ![tr0psn4j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@tr0psn4j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tr0psn4j)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/56 "2009-08-18T20:26:50Z")
I’ll fuckin… I’ll fuckin… Sew your asshole closed, and keep feedin you, and feedin you, and feedin you, and feedin you. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/57 "2009-08-18T20:33:01Z")
I’ll…make sure to explode in your general direction! ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/58 "2009-08-18T20:35:05Z")
I’ll give you a hug! Don’t look at me that way, I’ll do it. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/59 "2009-08-18T21:13:35Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > I’m going to rip off your husband’s cock and choke you to death on it. Knock it off of I’ll call every scary looking gun I see an assault rifle! _In print!_ 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791/60 "2009-08-18T21:27:17Z")
I’ll remind you of Woodstock again. With stage announcements. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/top-the-previous-posters-ridiculous-threat/506791.md?page=4)