# Trapped on a Desert Island with all the SDMB members? Virtual SDMB Civilization! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 25, 2003, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113 "2003-04-25T14:10:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/21 "2003-04-25T19:15:58Z")
I suppose we’d build a raft, but not until after \*\*Fuel \*\* got us to spend all day discussing slip angle, rudder size, log flex, and cross winds. **Zenster** would find a way to brew beer after a couple of days. Some folks would start gardens, so I’d have to spend my days carving gnomes.😃 ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/22 "2003-04-25T19:20:08Z")
Dang it - hoPe not home \<\\> ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/23 "2003-04-25T19:26:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Phlosphr \* > \*\*Actually, **Mr.Excellent** there are quite a few dopers who would share your sentiment. And you would most likely have a decent following. That is of course if you are able to best _me_ in a cocnut throwing game of dodge ball!!! \*\* Why would I want to beat you? You have the proper mind-set for dictatorship, it seems, and your high post count suggests you probably are well-known on the board, and have people who respect you. If we worked together, we could be much more efficient. 🙂 It would be an honor, sir, to repress the masses with you. ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/24 "2003-04-25T19:44:21Z")
I volunteer for the sure-to-be-arduous role of official SDMB desert island manslut. Be gentle. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/25 "2003-04-25T19:52:09Z")
By Golly! A compliment! Hmmm. **Raises Arm and points up** We have a winner!! [sub]little tidbit -\> you seem to have a good grasp on proper board etiquette, and a firm hold on the assertion: You scratch my back I scratch yours - you will fare just fine when we are all teleported to an abandoned island, and the hierarchy is chosen. [/sub] Ruling will be fun!😉 Though I am merely a philosopher, so having me in the shadows to tell people what questions to ask and when would be a better idea than having me on the front lines. I’m also quite the fisherman ---
**Author:** ![Tusculan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecd19e/32.png) [@Tusculan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tusculan)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/26 "2003-04-25T20:37:08Z")
Am I the only one being reminded first of the spaceship that Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect got stuck on at the end of _The Restaurant at the End of the Universe_, and the resulting settling on the planet they ended up on? Not to imply us Dopers are like those folks… but maybe I am 🙂 Can I get into a deep sleep and wake up when you guys have developed civilization? This to be defined as the moment there is indoor plumbing. Ooh, can we put **lieu** in charge of in- and outdoor plumbing? Well, if I _have_ to help you guys I guess I can be one of those mass scene actors Carrier #9 who just helps in moving stuff around and handing over utensils. I can make sarcasting remarks while carrying, too. Further I wonder whether the mods would still have the Power to Ban. ---
**Author:** ![Banger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8491ac/32.png) [@Banger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Banger)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/27 "2003-04-25T21:11:37Z")
I would build a little hut by the sea, a crude boat or raft, and spend my days fishing 🙂 I’ll leave all the political ambitions and civilization building to you folks. ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/28 "2003-04-25T21:18:53Z")
**Banger** if you don’t mind I’ll be _your_ neighbor. I love fishing. [sub]They are charging me 17 bucks here in CT for my fishing license. Bastards![/sub] ---
**Author:** ![flybynight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@flybynight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flybynight)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/29 "2003-04-25T21:31:03Z")
I’d run into the nearest hills, never to be seen or heard from again. But maybe, on particularly calm nights, when the breeze is just right, you could hear my maniacal laughter drifting faintly through the air. And you’d wonder, why is that idiot laughing? But then I’d return unseen and unheard one night, long in the future, to collect your first born while you slept. Then who would be laughing, I ask you? oh wait, it would still be me… doh! Then again, maybe I’d just be a lazy twenty-something, complain about having no TV to watch, and hit on all the cute SDMB women until someone made me do something… then I’d run into the hills! ---
**Author:** ![XJETGIRLX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9fc29f/32.png) [@XJETGIRLX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XJETGIRLX)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/30 "2003-04-25T21:42:16Z")
Alright, whose the one who managed to smuggle some whiskey down their shorts? I’ve got a couple bottles of JD and I’m lookin’ for some fun! First things first — I’d have to strike a match to **Coldfire** to get my bonfire started. Then **Henna Dancer** and I would take up to making grass skirts and coconut bikinis. I’d grab **pezpunk** and put him to work making some bongos, and I’d bring in **Ukelele Ike** for accompaniment. ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/31 "2003-04-25T21:52:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sapphire Wolf \* > **On first reading, I read that, "We might have to make a clique to shoot them down."** Well as long as we voted for it, it’d be legal. I doubt we’d actually go to the trouble of forming a constitution so there no guaranteed rights to get in the way of our democratic tyranny of the majority. As for where we are, the first thing that passed through my mind was “Cool, a doper Riverworld” which of course has the added benefit/penalty that we all wake up naked so we could get in some quick ogling. P.S. I volunteer to be on the entertainment crew. We’ll report the news for the island at 6pm and then from 7 to 10 we’ll just entertain. After 9 things get a little risque though. 😉 We’ll even make our own Britcom, “I’ve Got a Lovely Bunch of Coconut!” ---
**Author:** ![Super\_Gnat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Super\_Gnat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Super_Gnat)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/32 "2003-04-25T21:53:18Z")
I’d be fishing with **Banger** and **Phlosphr** , while attending regular services at the First Straight Dope Non-Denominational Christian Church and (Platonic) Love-Fest. Hey, while all the empire-building and wild orgies were going on, us fisher-folk might be able to eke out a rather nice existence. You know, what with the fish and all. (P.S., can you _imagine_ the tribal council?! **Libertarian** , **december** , and **Splanky** alone would be enough to give anyone hives!) (P. P. S., would the mods and admins still be in charge? And would they be swayed by sexual favors?) ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/33 "2003-04-25T21:55:01Z")
Please pass a law that makes coconut the official plural of coconut. The whole S thing is **so** last civilization. ---
**Author:** ![Banger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8491ac/32.png) [@Banger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Banger)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/34 "2003-04-25T21:58:03Z")
Yer welcome to join me at sea laddies, just leave yer politics at the end of me crappily built dock 😉 [sub]Banger, who fishes in the Great South Bay, and as such, needs no fishing licence[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/35 "2003-04-25T22:15:47Z")
If ya’ll decide to increase the population, don’t let me be in charge of feeding the babies. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Forbin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5e9695/32.png) [@Forbin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Forbin)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/36 "2003-04-25T22:17:37Z")
I can hew timber from logs, using an axe. I can then fashion said timber into all manner of useful articles, including buildings. I think I’d be a pretty worthwhile castaway. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Wearia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/13edae/32.png) [@Wearia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wearia)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/37 "2003-04-25T22:29:30Z")
Well of course, when the female dopers see me they will all fight for my affection. Soon that will settle down a bit and we’ll get to other issues. First we build huts and find food. Then we start our space program and nuclear research facility. Within 2 weeks with that many dopers in one place we’ll have 5 reactors and a fleet of coconut shuttles. We’ll colonize and terraform the moon within a year and then with our technological and diplomatic superiority over Earthlings we’ll over Earth. N. America will be renamed **Wearia’s Love Nest** , S.America to **South Wearia’s Love Nest** , Europe to **East Wearia’s Love Nest** , Africa to **Tiger and Elephant Land** , Austrailia to **Wearia’s Kangroo Adventure** , Asia to **Wearia’s Funpark and Spa** and Antartica to **Penguin Land**. From there we will abolish hunger, famine, disease and anti-sodomy laws. In other worlds, the world would become a slightly worse place. ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/38 "2003-04-25T22:39:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fern Forest \* > \*\*We’ll even make our own Britcom, “I’ve Got a Lovely Bunch of Coconut!” \*\* Oooh, oooh, I’ll forgo my army of monkeys if I can be the John Cleese/Basil Fawlty guy who just shouts at everyone. ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/39 "2003-04-25T23:07:46Z")
Hmmm…if the island is really as big as Australia…I guess I’d search for one particular young lady to vanish with. Then, you’d never see us, again. If it were smaller? Well, I guess I might as well stick around and volunteer to be snake control, since there’d be no getting away from people. (I’d still search out that young lady, though. :)) It sounds like we have plenty of other people who know how to fish and build things. But, it takes a bit of experience to safely handle a dangerous snake. And, I’d recommend most of you stay on the beach, and out of the jungle, till we know what’s out there. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113/40 "2003-04-25T23:38:40Z")
ooooh,oooh. Mr. Excellent, can I be your incompetent lacky who, just as you are at the height of your power, I betray you and start a reign of terror over the island for a thousand years (or until I get taken out)?😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trapped-on-a-desert-island-with-all-the-sdmb-members-virtual-sdmb-civilization/171113.md?page=3)