# Triangle Man hates Universe Man
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [February 13, 2006, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333 "2006-02-13T21:05:19Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/1 "2006-02-13T21:05:19Z")
They have a fight … WHO WINS?
It’s one of life’s biggest mysteries.
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### Author:  [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/2 "2006-02-13T21:08:47Z")
What kind of question is that? Who do you think we are, giants?
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### Author:  [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/3 "2006-02-13T21:11:35Z")
> [@Ponder Stibbons](#):
>
> What kind of question is that? Who do you think we are, giants?
I dunno–it’s certainly possible, isn’t it?
I think the problem is impossible. It’s like asking what happens when the earth crashes into a mosquito. Universe Man isn’t aware of Triangle Man’s existence, can’t ever be aware of it, and so he can’t enter a fight with him; Triangle Man can do nothing to make Universe Man even aware of his existence or to remotely affect him. No fight=no winner.
Daniel
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### Author:  [@malkavia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/malkavia)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/4 "2006-02-13T21:11:50Z")
> [@Ponder Stibbons](#):
>
> What kind of question is that? Who do you think we are, giants?
You might be.
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### Author:  [@Scupper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scupper)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/5 "2006-02-13T21:11:55Z")
The real mystery is why Triangle Man hates Universe Man. After all, Universe Man is well-known for usually being kind to smaller men.
As to who would win, I think it’s really no contest. Powerful man, Universe Man.
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### Author:  [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/6 "2006-02-13T21:13:47Z")
Don’t you remember what happend last time they met?
It was practically Happy Land.
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### Author:  [@Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speaker_for_the_Dead)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/7 "2006-02-13T21:15:18Z")
Far more important, of course, is whether Particle Man gets wet, or whether water gets _him_.
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### Author:  [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/8 "2006-02-13T21:23:06Z")
I’d rather be whistling in the dark.
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### Author:  [@ZebraShaSha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZebraShaSha)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/9 "2006-02-13T21:38:41Z")
Now, go back through the thread, pretending like you had never heard of TMBG. It would be one hell of a trip, I can bet you.
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### Author:  [@Illinois\_Boy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illinois_Boy)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/10 "2006-02-13T21:47:58Z")
I’m still PO’d about the Particle Man - Triangle Man fiasco of '90. I lost money on Particle!!
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### Author:  [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/11 "2006-02-13T21:52:47Z")
> [@malkavia](#):
>
> You might be.
Sigh. I guess it’s time to get serious about that diet, isn’t it? 😛
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### Author:  [@gooftroopag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gooftroopag)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/12 "2006-02-13T21:59:49Z")
> [@Scupper](#):
>
> The real mystery is why Triangle Man hates Universe Man.
It’s because he has a watch with a minute hand.
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### Author:  [@Jayn\_Newell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayn_Newell)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/13 "2006-02-13T22:06:07Z")
> [@Scupper](#):
>
> After all, Universe Man is well-known for usually being kind to smaller men.
Every time I hear that I think of the Tiny Toons music vid for this, where Universe Man pats Plucky gently on the head before punching him through a wall. Key word of course, being _usually_.
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### Author:  [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/14 "2006-02-13T22:28:04Z")
> [@gooftroopag](#):
>
> It’s because he has a watch with a minute hand.
I always thought the image of a “watch with a minute hand, millennium hand an an eon hand” was the trippiest/cleverest bit of lyric-writing I’ve ever heard.
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### Author:  [@Skott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skott)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/15 "2006-02-13T22:36:06Z")
> [@Ponder Stibbons](#):
>
> What kind of question is that? Who do you think we are, giants?
Nah, we’re defintely dwarves.
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### Author:  [@Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speaker_for_the_Dead)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/16 "2006-02-13T22:44:39Z")
Yes! +4 dodge bonuses all around.
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### Author:  [@dotchan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dotchan)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/17 "2006-02-13T22:52:40Z")
What I want to know is who came up with Person Man?
😃
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### Author:  [@Roland\_Orzabal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roland_Orzabal)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/18 "2006-02-13T23:14:33Z")
Eh, Triangle Man’s just pissed that he can’t go back to Constantinople. I think he had a date there…
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### Author:  [@Dan\_Norder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dan_Norder)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/19 "2006-02-13T23:33:53Z")
According to the Christian interpretation of the lyrics, Universe Man **is** Triangle Man.
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### Author:  [@Greywolf73](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greywolf73)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2006, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/triangle-man-hates-universe-man/344333/20 "2006-02-13T23:43:23Z")
He’s just upset that someone made a hole with a gun perpendicular to the name of this town in a desktop globe.
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