# Trolls R Us Resurrections (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 11, 2021, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518 "2021-09-11T17:26:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 442
**Author:** ![ParallelLines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/parallellines/32/3575_2.png) [@ParallelLines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParallelLines)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2025, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13348 "2025-04-02T19:16:54Z")
Eh, better safe than sorry. Although it raised a truly terrifying point… swooping crabs. Can you imagine the horror? Because I can only imagine giant [coconut crabs](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coconut_crab), while are KNOW to climb trees, dropping out of the sky down upon unwary creatures while muttering _“Dad-a-chum? Dum-a-chum? Ded-a-chek? Did-a-chick?”_ ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2025, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13349 "2025-04-02T19:55:01Z")
LOL, yikes!! I don’t want to think about those crabs swooping!! I was familiar with them and in fact, I recall @CairoCarol talking about how tasty they are. I could get behind _that_ part of an encounter with one! No idea how you catch one, though. Bait a trap with a chicken? ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2025, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13350 "2025-04-02T20:04:15Z")
> [@Aspenglow](#): > > No idea how you catch one, though. As crabs go, they are pretty sluggish. So just pick it up, I think. [That’s what Louey Louey did.](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-kitchen-accidents/925829/33) We were impressed by his crab-handling prowess; he clearly knew the right way to grab it so that he was safe from the claws. ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2025, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13351 "2025-04-02T21:01:49Z")
\< faint \> I guess it’s all what we’re used to, eh? I’ll wrangle a live, well chilled miniscule-by-comparison Dungeness crab from behind with heavy duty gloves and not even flinch (well, not more than once or twice). But I can’t see grabbing one of those bad boys, even if I knew how to do it. I’m glad Louey Louey came to your rescue and you all enjoyed the luscious feast to celebrate! ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2025, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13352 "2025-04-02T22:11:35Z")
If I saw one I’d call in an airstrike. That’s the minimum firepower to safely defeat one. From a safe distance. Whatever you do, don’t nuke them from orbit to be sure. As many 1950s documentaries showed us, the radiation will grow them to house-sized proportions in just a couple generations. That would be bad. Flying Crabs might be a great band name, but as an idea for a new genetically engineered critter, I gotta say “No, just no.” ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2025, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13353 "2025-04-03T01:39:56Z")
> [@Aspenglow](#): > > Bait a trap with a chicken? [https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/coconut-crabs-eat-everything-from-kittens-to-maybe-amelia-earhart-180948206/](https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/coconut-crabs-eat-everything-from-kittens-to-maybe-amelia-earhart-180948206/) Coconut Crabs Eat Everything from Kittens to, Maybe, Amelia Earhart According to one theory, Earhart did not drown in the Pacific but instead crashed on the remote Nikumaroro atoll, where she was eaten by coconut crabs ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2025, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13354 "2025-04-03T01:56:10Z")
I am sure if it were ever confirmed this was Earhart’s ultimate ghastly fate, she would gain more notoriety for it than anything else she had ever achieved. Which would be sad and too dreadful to contemplate, if she was still alive while being dispatched. Eeuuuggghh! Turn about is fair play, I suppose. Thanks for sharing this bizarre speculation. I think. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2025, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13355 "2025-04-03T01:56:44Z")
I am always delighted to be of service. ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2025, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13356 "2025-04-03T02:01:40Z")
This is why some coconut crabs taste ever so slightly like Spam. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2025, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13357 "2025-04-03T02:51:04Z")
^ Win. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2025, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13358 "2025-04-03T13:54:07Z")
You could try the spam, eggs, and spam. It’s not got much ~~spam~~ Earheart in it. Truth is, pretty much anyone whose body ends up in the sea ends up as crab chow. Especially the ones whose bodies are weighted down by being enclosed in a ship or airplane, so they get through the layers of top-feeder too quickly to be (much) consumed. Given the size of the Pacific and the paucity of islands, the odds Earheart landed on land are miniscule. Not zero, but within a rounding error of zero. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2025, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13359 "2025-04-03T16:04:45Z")
> [@susan](#): > > According to one theory, Earhart did not drown in the Pacific but instead crashed on the remote Nikumaroro atoll, where she was eaten by coconut crabs In Soviet Nikumaroro, crabs eat you. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2025, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13360 "2025-04-05T22:29:44Z")
Arguably, if I were to give this new ahem person the benefit of a doubt, I’d start 'em off in the other thread. But his very first post [GQ] is asking about signs and sequences of puberty, in both males _and_ females. Just seems like a very strange 1st post to begin one’s stay here. [**ChiefinTheKind** since I dislike playing the “Guess the Newb’s Handle” game] ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2025, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13361 "2025-04-05T22:56:15Z")
That one is interesting. Bland and sensible on the surface. Says he’s a longtime lurker and writes like he knows our house style cold. A sock? To what end? I don’t get red flags from the topic, but I’m not filled with the current hysteria for “OMG everybody online is a kiddie diddler or a wannabe.” Be interesting to see how the thread develops. Not yet getting much traction, but I think a lot of regulars don’t poke into FQ. Post #2 pretty well killed the factual part of the FQ. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2025, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13362 "2025-04-05T23:03:18Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Says he’s a longtime lurker An authentic longtime lurker is going to wet his feet I’d say in a much more low-profile manner, say in a Thread Game or the Game Room or that new Movies That The Kids Found Boring thread, and not have his first post be an OP on such a topic. IOW no hysteria here, just a common trend for such “newbies” that has played out here time and time again. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2025, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13363 "2025-04-05T23:40:02Z")
Right, because everyone is exactly the same. Oh wait, you only said he was probably not an authentic lurker because he didn’t behave like you expected, from your experience. The poster gave reasons for his interest that were at least plausible. Lacking hysteria is not particularly praiseworthy here; lacking accusatory tone would be a little better. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2025, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13364 "2025-04-06T00:05:15Z")
I mean, it’s something a troll could post… but it’s also something a sincere concerned parent could post. If we rush to judge every new poster as a troll, this board is going to die off. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2025, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13365 "2025-04-06T00:06:33Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > but it’s also something a sincere concerned parent could post. I reckon, but I know if I was his daughter, I’d be _mortified_ if I knew what he just said to a group of strangers on the internet. Plus the info in question is widely available. We shall see. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2025, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13366 "2025-04-06T00:12:27Z")
Well, yeah, mortifying your kids is part of a parent’s job. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2025, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518/13367 "2025-04-06T00:17:47Z")
Tee hee. I liked that. Then you get to stupefy grandkids, later. As a former lurker who joined I posted in threads long before I started a thread. So…no, I’ve noticed it goes both ways. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518.md?page=441) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trolls-r-us-resurrections-part-1/950518.md?page=443)