# TruePisces' Flirting Workshop - Come One, Come All **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 1, 2001, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347 "2001-04-01T06:06:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 14
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/261 "2001-04-03T12:15:01Z")
Care to join us? Or would you rather wait and be next? And maybe put that notepad down for a sec, they give NASTY papercuts! ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/262 "2001-04-03T12:15:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TruePisces \* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Robot Arm \* > > Now if only there was someplace you could order _that_ by mail. > > Oh, I think practicing is **far** more fun for that sort of thing anyway… You need to practice ordering things by mail? ---
**Author:** ![TPWombat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbce88/32.png) [@TPWombat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TPWombat)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/263 "2001-04-03T12:36:36Z")
I discovered [this](http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/flashq/xpl-01.htm) interesting item recently - how do you experienced people think it ranks vs the pussy snorkel as a flirting aid/conversation piece/icebreaker? Or should I not produce it until I have got to know the young lady better? Should I discuss it beforehand or spring it on her as a surprise? Your input would be appreciated. ---
**Author:** ![moi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@moi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moi)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/264 "2001-04-03T12:56:41Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by UncleBill_ > Care to join us? Or would you rather wait and be next? Oh. My. _blushes_ I think I’ll just let two pros go at it. I mean, I haven’t even passed my oral exams. _fidgets and looks at hardygrrl with a shy smile before heading back out to the main room, softly closing the door behind her_ ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/265 "2001-04-03T14:05:51Z")
Well, Cyn, looks like Uncle Bill’s offer of the love for the ages comes with the coda “or at least until a pretty girl crosses her legs at me and winks”. I’ll give him this, tho. The old ladies ARE staring. Now I, OTOH, promise to scoop the stars from the night sky to fily your eyes, capture a moonbeam of joy to fill your heart, and us a delicate shaft of sunlight to set every nerve ending aflame with passion. Interested? ---
**Author:** ![Tygr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/df788c/32.png) [@Tygr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tygr)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/266 "2001-04-03T14:09:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TruePisces \* > \*\*So which test is first? I’m ready to begin. > > [sub]Even have my number 2 pencil 😉 [/sub]\*\* Well, naturally, the first test will be the visual inspection of the material. Now, taken as a whole[sup]_snicker!_[/sup] the material looks good from here. But to make a truly informed decision, I’m going to need to examine the salient (but _obviously_ not saline) points from a much closer perspective. Lacking the opportunity to perform a live inspection, I’ll just make you aware that have a large, high resolution computer screen. It should almost be able to fit the material in question. [sub]…and GET that pencil OUTTA here! I NEVER engage in written tests. I’m much more into the _other_ kind. 'sides, I’m fully aware that you work other implements MUCH better than you work a pencil.[/sub] > [@](#): > > Now **that** earns you a _blush_ from the teacher. woo-HOO! Made the _teacher_ blush. Does that earn me extra credit? I don’t want the rest of the class to think I’m sucking up to you (even though that DOES sound like fun - hmmm, maybe that’s what your office is for?), but I AM going to try for some extra credit: > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TruePisces \* > **I just got my new pussy snorkel in the mail, and I can’t wait to try it out!** :: Pulls out his wallet and presents a card.:: Ma’am, as you can see, I’m a fully licensed and qualified diver, and _I also give snorkling instrucion._ Allow me to offer you a full demonstration. And remember our motto - Divers go down better! ---
**Author:** ![Cyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a88e4f/32.png) [@Cyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyn)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/267 "2001-04-03T14:20:22Z")
Well, I’m learning a lot. If only all men were as clever as those on the board, I wouldn’t be as well-rested as I am, damn it all. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/268 "2001-04-03T14:38:58Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by moi \* > \*\* Oh. My. blushes > I think I’ll just let two pros go at it. I mean, I haven’t even passed my oral exams. fidgets and looks at hardygrrl with a shy smile before heading back out to the main room, softly closing the door behind her_\* I’m not a pro, I am only a volunteer. Taking payments would violate my membership criteria for the National Association of Flirters. And before closing that door, dear moi, flash me that shy smile once again? I ADORE shy smiles! Oral Exams can be arranged post haste! ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/269 "2001-04-03T14:46:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cyn \* > \*\*Well, I’m learning a lot. If only all men were as clever as those on the board, I wouldn’t be as well-rested as I am, damn it all. \*\* Wanna work out to the point of physical exhaustion? We’ll sleep better that way! ---
**Author:** ![LindyHopper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ebca7d/32.png) [@LindyHopper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LindyHopper)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/270 "2001-04-03T14:47:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TruePisces \* > \*\*Are you coming? \*\* Not yet…😉 I mean, talk to me like that and I’ll follow you anywhere. :gets up and follows **TP** into her office: Hey, what’s _that_ for? ---
**Author:** ![Cyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a88e4f/32.png) [@Cyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyn)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/271 "2001-04-03T14:47:28Z")
How am I supposed to resist being filled with such lovely things? I smile upon you. I anticipate. ---
**Author:** ![dublos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f08c70/32.png) [@dublos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dublos)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/272 "2001-04-03T14:55:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by moi \* > **Oh. My. _blushes_ > I think I’ll just let two pros go at it. I mean, I haven’t even passed my oral exams. _fidgets and looks at hardygrrl with a shy smile before heading back out to the main room, softly closing the door behind her_** Well, hello there, did you know the constructon crew’s been really busy creating offices for all the new instructors TP keeps deputizing… would you like to see how I decorated mine? I’ve always been partial to soft leather, lots of pillows and a nice firm futon for when you need to strech out a bit. -Doug ---
**Author:** ![moi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@moi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moi)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/273 "2001-04-03T15:24:57Z")
_making eye contact_ [sub]Woohoo![/sub] _sashays alongside Dublos for the Grand Tour, pausing run her hand over a pillow_ What a soft fabric. Everything’s quite beautiful… > [@](#): > > _UncleBill sez:_ And before closing that door, dear moi, flash me that shy smile once again? I ADORE shy smiles! Oral Exams can be arranged post haste! And I adore being adored. Thank ya, dahlin’. _smiles_ [sup]Yeah! How was that, TruePisces??[/sup] ---
**Author:** ![dublos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f08c70/32.png) [@dublos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dublos)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/274 "2001-04-03T15:45:39Z")
> [@](#): > > sashays alongside Dublos for the Grand Tour, pausing run her hand over a pillow > What a soft fabric. Everything’s quite beautiful… Why thank you… I tried for comfortable and functional with enough color to keep things interesting. _easing up against Moi from behind as she gazes at the the bookshelves_ I also had a sound system installed, any musical preference for background while we get on with the lesson? _resting a hand on Moi’s hip and guiding her over to the vast CD collection_ The school did a really great job finding lots of interesting artists and titles to listen to as well as a full selection of main stream. There’s a full Barry White collection, Marvin Gay, and Joe, as well as Nine Inch Nails and The Blood Hound Gang for those really energetic sessions. _standing close enough behind Moi that I know she can feel my breath on her neck_ Finding anything that suits your fancy? -Doug ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/275 "2001-04-03T15:48:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by moi \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > _UncleBill sez:_ And before closing that door, dear moi, flash me that shy smile once again? I ADORE shy smiles! Oral Exams can be arranged post haste! > > And I adore being adored. Thank ya, dahlin’. _smiles_ > > [sup]Yeah! How was that, TruePisces??[/sup] \*\* Now was THAT a Southern accent? The Adoration Meter[sup]TM[/sup] could get pegged here. ---
**Author:** ![moi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@moi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moi)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/276 "2001-04-03T16:15:17Z")
_aside to **TP** _ Whoa. The last two posts were all about me. This seems to be working! **UncleBill** : Unfortunately, while I lived a few years in the South, I’m not born and bred. And, as folx in those localities say, just 'cos your cat had kittens in the oven, that don’t make 'em biscuits. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/277 "2001-04-03T16:19:15Z")
Filling you with a lovely thing was _exactly_ what I had in mind. ---
**Author:** ![moi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@moi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moi)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/278 "2001-04-03T16:23:05Z")
_moi closes her eyes and smiles slowly at the warm sensation on her neck_ Mmmmm… I mean…_blushes_ I rather like the first NIN album…_gathering her self, she picks it out from the rack and turns to face dublos_ ---
**Author:** ![dublos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f08c70/32.png) [@dublos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dublos)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/279 "2001-04-03T16:46:58Z")
Mmmmm… good selection, just push that button there to open the CD player. _taking Moi’s hand and guiding it in the correct direction while softly stroking her palm_ There, now we can just ease over here, and… _dancing Moi over toward one of the couches, knowing she can feel the effect she’s having on me by how tightly our hips are grinding into one another as we dance._ -Doug ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2001, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347/280 "2001-04-03T17:11:01Z")
Damn. I should have snapped dublos up as my online flirting partner when I had the chance… _sits and waits for the next instructor to come along_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347.md?page=13) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/truepisces-flirting-workshop-come-one-come-all/60347.md?page=15)