# Trump is dying **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Tags:** trump\ **Created:** [August 27, 2025, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520 "2025-08-27T07:09:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 71
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2026, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1402 "2026-01-22T20:34:10Z")
Trump appears to have a zombie bite on his left hand today. [![](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4llrhdclvdlmmynkwsmg5tdc/bafkreigcqsoll6qjjl5jgxyrc5sum7ljfnrtjdvceafnvivbmpna5kfu74@jpeg) ](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4llrhdclvdlmmynkwsmg5tdc/bafkreigcqsoll6qjjl5jgxyrc5sum7ljfnrtjdvceafnvivbmpna5kfu74@jpeg) ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2026, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1403 "2026-01-22T20:56:04Z")
If that’s a bruise from an IV needle site, it makes one wonder if it means all other suitable veins for IV needle entry have already been used and re-used too many times and the visible hand one is the last resort. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2026, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1404 "2026-01-22T20:59:18Z")
New lie to cover up his obvious sign of poor health: > **[White House attributes Trump’s heavy left-hand bruising to him hitting it at...](https://www.cnn.com/2026/01/22/politics/hand-bruising-trump-health)** > > The White House said Thursday that bruising on President Donald Trump’s left hand stemmed from him hitting it on the signing table during a Board of Peace event in Davos, Switzerland, earlier in the day. Weird that he keeps getting bruises on the same spots on his hands for wildly different reasons (like shaking hands). ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2026, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1405 "2026-01-22T21:06:29Z")
His hand walked into a doornob. ---
**Author:** ![irae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f0a364/32.png) [@irae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irae)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2026, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1406 "2026-01-22T21:18:36Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > Trump appears to have a zombie bite on his left hand today. > > [](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4llrhdclvdlmmynkwsmg5tdc/bafkreigcqsoll6qjjl5jgxyrc5sum7ljfnrtjdvceafnvivbmpna5kfu74@jpeg) So there’s a zombie out there with syphilis now?! Thanks, Obama! ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2026, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1407 "2026-01-22T22:30:36Z")
> [@irae](#): > > So there’s a zombie out there with syphilis now?! Syphilitic zombies? Someone pitch this to HBO, stat! ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2026, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1408 "2026-01-22T23:36:09Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > MAHA’s food pyramid is complete. But will it fit up his pants? Time for some lab work… ---
**Author:** ![scudsucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scudsucker/32/14101_2.png) [@scudsucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scudsucker)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2026, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1409 "2026-01-23T19:02:34Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > If that’s a bruise from an IV needle site, it makes one wonder if it means all other suitable veins for IV needle entry have already been used I’ve done medical trials in the UK, and placement of the catheter or IV was quite random. I preferred it in my left arm near my elbow but have had one on my right hand in exactly the area Trump is bruised. It was up to the nurse in the end. I’ve had bruises, but nothing like that… although I was a healthy 30 year old at the time. I hear heroin addicts occasionally try for the big vein in the penis, but I assume there is nothing big in Trumps pants. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2026, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1410 "2026-01-23T19:20:03Z")
TBF, I’m always banging my hands and arms against things. I get bruises like that from time to time (though not as big). My PCP says, ‘That just happens as you age.’ It’s a better explanation than too much handshaking. ---
**Author:** ![Jihi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jihi/32/17768_2.png) [@Jihi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jihi)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2026, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1411 "2026-01-23T22:05:42Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > My PCP says, ‘That just happens as you age.’ It’s a better explanation than too much handshaking. That makes sense. But it would require the dictator to admit he’s an actual real human being and there’s no way the regime can allow that. ---
**Author:** ![ASL\_v2.0](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asl_v2.0/32/3525_2.png) [@ASL\_v2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASL_v2.0)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1412 "2026-01-24T01:24:22Z")
I’m reminded of the portrait Marge Simpson paints for/of Mr. Burns. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1413 "2026-01-24T01:43:26Z")
I got a similar bruise (accompanied by an impressive lump) when I was installing seat covers in my Jeep; the little hook at the end of an elastic strap snapped back and hit me. (I’m not sure he could fit in the rear footwell of a WK, even with the seat all the way forward.) ---
**Author:** ![Disinfectus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/disinfectus/32/11085_2.png) [@Disinfectus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Disinfectus)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1414 "2026-01-24T01:43:54Z")
> [@scudsucker](#): > > I hear heroin addicts occasionally try for the big vein in the penis I defensively crossed my legs when I read that. ---
**Author:** ![Jihi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jihi/32/17768_2.png) [@Jihi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jihi)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1415 "2026-01-24T01:51:28Z")
Same here. That particular combination of words should be illegal. And shame on you for making me read it again. 🫩 ---
**Author:** ![Disinfectus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/disinfectus/32/11085_2.png) [@Disinfectus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Disinfectus)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1416 "2026-01-24T01:56:55Z")
I was taught to share. ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1417 "2026-01-24T02:20:26Z")
Penis? ( No thanks ) ---
**Author:** ![Disinfectus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/disinfectus/32/11085_2.png) [@Disinfectus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Disinfectus)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1418 "2026-01-24T02:33:15Z")
I wonder if it’s a bad idea to share penis heroin needles? ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1419 "2026-01-24T02:41:41Z")
> [@Disinfectus](#): > > penis heroin needles? Is that some kind of John Deere roto-tiller? ( I don’t think your spouse will like that but you can ask her. ) ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1420 "2026-01-24T03:03:24Z")
> [@Disinfectus](#): > > penis heroin needles Not a real good name for a band. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2026, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520/1421 "2026-01-24T03:06:53Z")
> [@Railer13](#): > > Not a real good name for a band Definitely would be very punk, however. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520.md?page=70) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-is-dying/1022520.md?page=72)