# Trying to decide which of you I should kidnap **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 24, 2026, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348 "2026-05-24T12:22:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/61 "2026-05-26T01:37:44Z")
In addition to the Red Chief problem noted upthread, there’s also the J. Paul Getty problem. When his grandson was kidnapped, Getty (a billionaire) refused to pay the ransom. After _four months_ the kidnappers cut off the grandson’s ear. Getty **STILL** refused to pay up. After another four weeks the kidnappers settled for a fraction of the original ransom because they were afraid their hostage would die from his wounds. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/62 "2026-05-26T10:42:29Z")
I bet the big family Thanksgiving was awkward the next year. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/63 "2026-05-26T13:19:32Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > So I’d end up paying myself - The advantage is that the FBI might not catch you in the act so you’d get away with it. Leave the ransom in the loo; they won’t follow you in there > [@Si\_Amigo](#): > > I make decent desert cocktails Sex on the Beach? > [@Princhester](#): > > people get less keen on remaining kidnapped when you mention “bolt cutters” and “toes“ in the same sentence. Frank Stein would lose his head if you suggested using bolt cutters in him. > [@LSLGuy](#): > > I bet the big family Thanksgiving was awkward the next year. Nah, his grandson wouldn’t hear of it. ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/64 "2026-05-26T15:35:15Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I bet the big family Thanksgiving was awkward the next year. > [@Spiderman](#): > > Nah, his grandson wouldn’t hear of it. OK, I laughed way too hard at this one! ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/65 "2026-05-26T15:48:22Z")
Heh, when I saw the title in the latest column I immediately thought “hmm, I wonder who created _this_ thread”. FairyChatMom? It’s always the ones you least suspect… 🤨 > [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#): > > My wife will give you $50 to not return me. burpo stole my answer, except my wife would likely offer more. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/66 "2026-05-26T17:00:18Z")
Of course I’d be the one you’d least suspect. It’d be insane to do it otherwise. Sheesh! ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/67 "2026-05-26T18:13:24Z")
I got an RPG campagin I’m DMing, if you kidnap me my players would ransom me, for a bit of XP, and some magic items. Alternatively they may decide to go on a quest and rescue me… ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/68 "2026-05-26T19:05:36Z")
Hell, you’ve _got_ the ring, just vanish. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/69 "2026-05-26T19:07:08Z")
Heh, my wife is gonna haggle. ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2026, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348/70 "2026-05-26T19:37:23Z")
That’s actively recommended against in the end user agreement. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trying-to-decide-which-of-you-i-should-kidnap/1030348.md?page=3)