# TSDMB Enemies List **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 5, 2000, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739 "2000-02-05T01:57:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![KCB615](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ea666f/32.png) [@KCB615](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KCB615)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/21 "2000-02-05T04:41:00Z")
## Ann Landers. And her sister Dear Abby (Van Buren). Never have so many Urban Legends been viewed by the populus as from these two. “Oh, Dear Abby said not to flash my headlights at people because its a gang initiation…” Jeremy… Nobody ever calls me after they’ve done something smart. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/22 "2000-02-05T07:04:00Z")
You forgot Dr. Laura. Ugh. I _hate_ Dr. Laura. She’s fifty times worse than Dear Abby and Ann Landers put together and multiplied by Marilyn Vos Savant. * * * ~Harborina “This is my sandbox. I’m not allowed to go in the deep end. That’s where I saw the leprechauns.” ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 7:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/23 "2000-02-05T07:05:00Z")
Pauly Shore ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/24 "2000-02-05T07:36:00Z")
If Doctor Laura is on it, then please add Rush Limbaugh and also : the CIA the FBI the DoD and numerous other governmental agencies and simply becaue he deserves to be there : Ted Turner Thanks * * * “A single lifetime, even though entirely devoted to the sky, would not be enough for the investigation of so vast a subject.” - Seneca ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 9:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/25 "2000-02-05T09:01:00Z")
I think **Mike Tyson** nominates himself with this quote : “When I was in prison I was wrapped up in all those deep books. That Tolstoy crap. People shouldn’t read that stuff. When we read these books what purpose does it serve in this day and time?” How about **MTV**? Fashionably Loud? Do I have to say anything more? And **Maury Povich** , the man who has stopped trying to think of new topics and focuses entirely on “Wild Teens,” without even bothering to wonder how they got so wild in the first place, treating the parents like saints for putting up with them instead of monsters for making the kids the way they are. **Fred Durst** , lead singer of Limp Bizkit, who claims to have never read a book in his entire life. * * * The truths of religion are never so well understood as by those who have lost the power of reasoning. –Voltaire ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 9:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/26 "2000-02-05T09:13:00Z")
> [@](#): > > APB9999: > I don’t know who Mr. Wildemon is, but keeping with precedent you have the benefit of the doubt and he is now ON THE LIST. Donald Wildmon heads the National Foundation for Decency, or the Legion of Decency, or whatever he calls it these days. He announced various boycotts of tv advertisers, with limited success, before getting 7-11 to remove Playboy and other magazines from their shelves in 1986. He often calls for movie boycotts, before first seeing the movies in question. Doesn’t MvS take IQ tests for a living? If so, she’s probably pretty good at it by now. That doesn’t make her the world’s smartest human, though: if any experienced Dopers were to do the same, you’d probably be scoring in her range before too long. How about adding Jerry Falwell and Oral Roberts? * * * “You can observe a lot just by watching.” – Yogi Berra ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 9:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/27 "2000-02-05T09:19:00Z")
> [@](#): > > John Rush: > He often calls for movie boycotts, before first seeing the movies in question. Sorry, should read, “without seeing the movies in question.” ---
**Author:** ![kawliga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ea666f/32.png) [@kawliga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kawliga)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 9:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/28 "2000-02-05T09:20:00Z")
Surely Louis Farrakhan has earned a spot on the list. ---
**Author:** ![David\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/51bf81/32.png) [@David\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/David_B)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/29 "2000-02-05T14:06:00Z")
Paul Harvey. He spreads even more urban legends and mistruths than Ann Landers and Dear Abby put together. ---
**Author:** ![David\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/51bf81/32.png) [@David\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/David_B)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/30 "2000-02-05T14:07:00Z")
Can’t forget Andrew Weil either. ---
**Author:** ![ruadh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d2c977/32.png) [@ruadh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ruadh)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/31 "2000-02-05T14:33:00Z")
Two personal pet hates of mine: Andrea Dworkin and Catherine MacKinnon. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/32 "2000-02-05T14:43:00Z")
Gloria Allred The Spokesweasel for the Shrill and Strident ---
**Author:** ![special](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/special)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/33 "2000-02-05T14:58:00Z")
any church any 12-step program any of them promote the idea that you are powerless w/ have no control over your own actions or destiny. the state of kansas kansas is finally coming into its own as a place where the populace lives in a fairy tale. l. frank baum couldn’t have thought of a better place to have based his stories, altho, of course, flying monkeys will never evolve _there_. ---
**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/34 "2000-02-05T15:07:00Z")
The inventor of Cliff’s Notes? * * * “You should tell the truth, expose the lies and live in the moment.” - Bill Hicks ---
**Author:** ![Globe-trotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cab0a1/32.png) [@Globe-trotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Globe-trotter)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/35 "2000-02-05T15:19:00Z")
How about Phyllis Schlafly? * * * Eat right, exercise daily, live clean, die anyway. ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/36 "2000-02-05T15:56:00Z")
I got one! Natalie -fucking- Ross I hated that bitch, talk about ignorant!! Oh, wait…you want FAMOUS folks huh? How 'bout Mr Bill-“I did not lie, I just didnt tell the truth”-Clinton? And the NRA ---
**Author:** ![Shadowfox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Shadowfox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shadowfox)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/37 "2000-02-05T17:07:00Z")
I agree that most of these people should be on the list, but you forgot somebody: Jesse “The Guv” Ventura * * * Shadowfox _“Distinguished” Sexy assistant to Head Honcho, Self-Righteous Clique_ ---
**Author:** ![APB9999](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e8cbc/32.png) [@APB9999](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/APB9999)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2000, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/38 "2000-02-05T17:53:00Z")
Okay, I made it into work today (Saturday) after all. These are some great nominations. We now have: Art Bell The U.S. Congress L.Ron Hubbard Lyndon Larouche The Learning Channel Uri Geller The Kansas State Board of Education Derida Whoever dreamed up the “infomercial” Whoever dreamed up the term “infomercial” Dionne Warwick and the Psychic Friends Network The various State Lottery Commissions The RJ Reynolds Tobacco Company The Republican Party Slim Fast Shirley Maclaine The FDA (well-intentioned, but overly PACed) The EPA (same story) The PACs NPR The Democratic Party Jerry Springer Ed McMahon and Publisher’s Clearinghouse Fred Phelps Jack Chick Marilyn vos Savant (for heresy) Rush Limbaugh Howard Stern Donald Wildmon (Wildemon?) Martha Stewart Al Gore Ann Landers Abby VanBuren (Dear Abby) Dr. Laura Schlesinger, or however you spell it Pauly Shore The CIA The FBI The DoD Ted Turner Mike Tyson MTV (Good One!) Maury Povich Fed Durst Jerry Falwell Oral Roberts John Rush Louis Farrakhan Paul Harvey Andrea Dworkin Catherine MacKinnon Gloria Allred Cliff of _Cliff’s Notes_ Phyllis Schlafly The NRA Natalie-fucking-Ross Governor Jesse Ventura ---
**Author:** ![APB9999](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e8cbc/32.png) [@APB9999](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/APB9999)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2000, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/39 "2000-02-06T06:18:00Z")
The list waxes. But I confess to being culturally illiterate enough not to know some of these people. I’m going to suggest that future nominees have a brief statement of _why_ they deserve to be here, preferably with an asinine quote. The Mike Tyson one was a good example. In adherence to precedent I’ve listed the following people, despite their being no more to be than vaguely familiar names, and sometimes not even that. Pauly Shore (I’ve heard his name many times, but honestly have no idea what he’s famous for, besides celebrity. Why should he be on the EL?) Fred Durst OOPS, I just realized I accidentally put YOUR name on there, John Rush. Editorial error only, be assured. You’re not…ON THE LIST. Andrew Weil (sounds familiar, but I can’t quite place it). Gloria Allred Natalie-fucking-Ross Ah, I overlooked our illustrious POTUS. Bill Clinton certainly has not been a shining light of forthcoming honesty for which he is now ON THE LIST. Special, I’m not against widespread smearing of all races, creeds, ethnicities, political alignments, sexual orientations, etc. But I think it will be more fun to be a little more specific than “any church”. I was going to accept “any 12-step program”, but then I thought, ‘What about a twelve step program to free yourself of the influence of a church?’. Can you suggest maybe a particular program? Also, the Kansas State Board of Education is on the list already to serve notice on those Kansasses. And Gabriel, Rush Limbaugh is already on there, too. My newest nominees: Judge Judy, for general condescension and undue nosiness. The makers of “Trivial Pursuit” for getting so many truly Trivial things **wrong** The Ayatollah Khomeini for declaring fatwah against the author of a book he found offensive. Dan Quayle for, well, everything. George Dubbya Bush for the following > [@](#): > > BUSH QUOTES > “When I was coming up, it was a dangerous world and you knew > exactly who they were. It was us versus them and it was > clear who them was. Today we are not so sure who the they > are, but we know they’re there.” > – Texas Gov. George W. Bush, presidential candidate. > “Food on the family.” > – George W. Bush listing one of the priorities of his > future administration. > > “This is Preservation month. I appreciate preservation. This > is what you do when you run for president. You’ve got to > preserve.” > – George W. Bush to several hundred children at an > elementary school in Nashua that was celebrating what it > called Perseverance Month (not Preservation Month). > > “Is your children learning?” > – George W. Bush on education. > > “Some people have too much freedom.” > – George W. Bush > > “The Grecians.” > – George W. Bush on Greek people. > > “What I’m against is quotas. I’m against hard quotas, > quotas that basically delineate based upon whatever. > However they delineate, quotas, I think, vulcanize society.” > – George W. Bush, meaning to say “balkanize,” not > “vulcanize” – we think – and something about quotas > (Austin American-Statesman 3/23/99). > > “Sitting down and reading a 500-page book on public policy > or philosophy or something.” > – George W. Bush when asked to name something he isn’t good > at (Talk magazine, > September 1999). > > “Please! Don’t kill me.” > – George W. Bush to Larry King, mocking what Karla Faye > Tucker said when asked “What would you say to Governor > Bush?” prior to her execution by lethal > injection (as reported by Talk magazine, September 1999). > > “Tell them I have learned from mistakes I may or may not > have made.” > – George W. Bush > > “Just make sure you put in there, 'He was real tired, too.”’ > – George W. Bush on the press reporting his verbal miscues. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2000, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739/40 "2000-02-06T06:21:00Z")
Somehow, you’ve overlooked Kathee Lee Gifford and Regis Philbin. Can you just add “Any Televangelist”? * * * **R** anger **J** eff \*The Idol of American Youth \* [Riders In The Sky](http://www.ridersinthesky.com) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tsdmb-enemies-list/13739.md?page=3)