I know very few people who got pregnant the first time they ever had sex. There was, however, a long string of people in the movies who had sex with somebody once and got pregnant.
Character changes their mind and rushes to the airport to declare their love…oh no! Too late; the plane has taken off.
But the other character didn’t get on the plane! Rejoice!
And you only throw up if you are.
Also, one cough and you should probably go pick a casket out.
Dumpy guy and ultra-hot wife.
I could excuse if it said dumpy guy was fabulously wealthy enough to afford a hot young chick.
Someone either A) Pulls the fire alarm, or B) Puts a lighter/match/flame up to a sprinkler head which results in
C) All the sprinkler heads in the building going off.
Um, sprinkler heads A) Do Not activate when a fire alarm is pulled, and B) act indepenantly of eachother by being heat activated to avoid unnecessary water damage. Unless you’re going to flame each one they will never all go off at the same time.
And there’s just as long a string of people who have apparently unprotected sex without any real consequences.
There have been a million instances where the Hero insists on totally honesty regarding his disdain and intent to stop the Villain, where if he would just pretend for a minute or two that he was on board with joining forces for evil, escape/rescue would be easy. But he can not tell a lie. Unless it’s constantly lying to his loved ones about his real work.
Another thing I hate (LOST is the worst at this)- Our captured hero’s always yell “LET ME OUT OF HERE!” “UNTIE ME!”
I’d really like to see that:
Victim: Hey! What are you doing! UNTIE ME!
Captor: Oh, fine.
It occurs to me that if, leading up to the climax of some “rebelling against the oppressive man” movie, a rebellious student or employee decided to jump on a desk and hold a lighter to a sprinkler head while the inspirational music swelled… and then only his sprinkler activated, leaving everybody staring as he is doused in water on his desk, it’d be frigging hilarious. I’m picturing an 80’s John Cusack type doing this.
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It’s lupus.
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It’s not lupus.
A kickass new coach takes over a losing sports team, only to have the star players walk out because he’s “too tough”. He calls their bluff, though, and pretty soon they come back and sheepishly ask to rejoin the team. Do we ever, ever need to see this again?
Can’t believe no one has yet mentioned this one:
The bomb with the large (usually digital) timer ticking down. The bomb can be defused by cutting one wire . . . but which one?!
That, alone, is bad enough. But then we get the bomb expert on the phone/radio frantically looking through his manuals to find the answer. This is especially humorous if the bomb is homemade, which they usually are; do all crazy terrorist bomb makers always use the same color coding for their wiring?
That, alone, is bad enough. But then the final stupidity that always makes me want to hurl something through the screen: When the (correct, of course) wire is cut, the timer stops! It doesn’t go dark, which some severely tortured logic might be able to explain, it always stops showing the one-to-seven seconds that the hero just made it by. How the HELL could cutting a wire – especially one that should be an OUTPUT of the timer in order to trigger the bomb – cause the timer to just STOP???
Writers, I implore you: put this one in the grave.
“I hate you”
“No, I hate you”
“You’re a vile, terrible man!”
“You are a horrible bitchy shrew!”
Oh, wait, now we’re both really turned on! Let’s start making out! We were made for each other!
Bleagh. I mean, I guess I can see this happening in real life once in a while under some bizarre circumstances, but it happens all the damn time in movies. It’s gotten to the point that whenever a man and a woman are arguing in a movie I start to think to myself “I just bet there’s going to be some making out sometime pretty soon…”
Putting a body part through glass will cut it to pieces. Putting your whole body through it will almost certainly kill you.
Stop showing people getting thrown out of storefront windows and have them be stunned but OK on the sidewalk, or worse, having the hero throw himself through a window to get away.
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This is not just common in TV, but is the very backbone of many a movie ‘comedy’. Roger Ebert calls it The Idiot Plot, meaning there would be no movie at all if the characters weren’t such idiots in the first place.
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Lupus? It’s NEVER lupus.
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I have one! You have a hero/heroine who, whether attempting to get a love life or save the world, is stymied by his/her care of…The Troubled Younger Sibling. (See the remake of the 6 Million Dollar Woman or whatever it was, cancelled last year. See Jericho, also cancelled. See Party of Five.)…Their parents, as sure as the sun rises in the East, died tragically, usually in a car crash, leaving Troubled Younger Sibling in the care of our hero/heroine. They won’t be split up, dammit, because family is family! Though the pain in the ass sibling is always getting in trouble. Skipping school, sticking her nose into the older sibling’s private affairs, thwarting a budding romance or the saving of the universe, getting kidnapped by The Villain, and generally staggering around with a metaphysical bucket over her head. If I had to defuse a bomb and my younger sister kept calling me to whine about too much homework, I’d send her off with a one-way bus ticket to go live with Auntie Roo in Montana. … (This would give us a new TV cliche, the gruff, independent aunt/uncle, never married with kids, who is blessed to become Mother/Father figure to The Troubled Orphaned Young Niece/Nephew…oh, it’s tough at first, but family is family, dammit! See Family Affair.)
Rather than cutting one of the timer’s outputs, could they be cutting one of the inputs necessary for the timer to decrement?
Actually, depending on the type of glass and how fast you go through, there’s a decent chance you can go through a plate-glass window and not be dead.
Bleeding and in pain, yes, but you’ll live.
If it was safety glass? Which a lot of commercial window glass is nowdays for liability reasons.
Is there a risk you actually die just from jumping through a glass window? That sounds unlikely to me.
Click on “windows” here.