# Twisted horoscopes
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/twisted-horoscopes/53711
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [February 8, 2001, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/twisted-horoscopes/53711 "2001-02-08T23:53:35Z")
**Posts on this page:** 2
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Clucky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clucky)
#### Post date: [February 8, 2001, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/twisted-horoscopes/53711/1 "2001-02-08T23:53:35Z")
Okay, I don’t know if this is a breech of etiquette on the SDMB, but I think the title of a previous thread (which has a link below) is misleading. It’s not really horoscopes. It’s a spoof, inspired by The Onion’s horoscopes. Sorry it had to come to this, but I spent two hours not working today just to come up with these, so I must direct you to them.
_Pleeease_, I _neeeeed_ acknowledgement. Tell me they suck, if you will, but tell me something.
[Twisted horoscopes](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=59148)
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### Author:  [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)
#### Post date: [February 9, 2001, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/twisted-horoscopes/53711/2 "2001-02-09T00:01:11Z")
I think you are on the right track…maybe more future-tense is needed?
Now stand still while I mark your life with my parking validation stamp.