# Two colors short of a Rainbow **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 11, 2000, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014 "2000-08-11T20:21:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/21 "2000-08-12T05:18:41Z")
> [@](#): > > The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead. This one is my personal favorite. I used to have it on my screen saver, at _work._ My boss looked at me funny the first time she saw it. Why? _She didn’t get it._ Bright lady in most respects, but sometimes the simple things just sail right past her. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/22 "2000-08-12T05:41:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Persephone \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead. > > This one is my personal favorite. I used to have it on my screen saver, at _work._ My boss looked at me funny the first time she saw it. Why? _She didn’t get it._ Bright lady in most respects, but sometimes the simple things just sail right past her. > \*\* You could practically hear it flying past her: WHOOOOOOOSH!!! Lord knows I’ve had that feeling. Thank god I’m good at nodding and looking thoughtful and laughing anyway and other assorted “I Got It!” tactics. ---
**Author:** ![darkcool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5f8ce5/32.png) [@darkcool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/darkcool)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/23 "2000-08-12T08:14:07Z")
Couldn’t find his asshole with a funnel. ---
**Author:** ![Gilligan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Gilligan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gilligan)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/24 "2000-08-12T12:18:10Z")
Doesn’t have both oars in the water – can’t even find the damn boat. Knitting with only one needle. Encyclopedia’s missing some volumes. His drill doesn’t have a full set of bits. Easier to count the bricks left than the bricks missing. Not only a few brick short, but is missing someone else’s bricks as well. Mind like a steel trap - anything entering gets crushed and mangled. Suffers from Clue Deficit Disorder. Doesn’t just know nothing; doesn’t even suspect much. During evolution his ancestors were in the control group. Marching to a different kettle of fish. On permanent leave of absence from his senses. People around him are at risk of second hand idiocy. Mind readers charge him half price. ---
**Author:** ![Gazoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ce73a5/32.png) [@Gazoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazoo)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/25 "2000-08-12T15:00:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gilligan \* > **Mind like a steel trap - anything entering gets crushed and mangled.** Has a mind like a steel sieve. ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/26 "2000-08-12T15:18:48Z")
The “official” term is “fulldeckisms”…there is a somewhat comprehensive list (over 1300 for your viewing pleasure) here [http://herbison.com/canon/fulldeck.html](http://herbison.com/canon/fulldeck.html) ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/27 "2000-08-12T19:00:35Z")
One I say about my brother: Boy’s so dense, I’m surprised there’s not a black hole around his head. ---
**Author:** ![Althea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@Althea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Althea)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/28 "2000-08-12T19:52:25Z")
He’s got two brain cells left, and they’re fighting. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/29 "2000-08-12T19:57:48Z")
A few dimes short of a roll. Doesn’t know his ass from a hole in the ground. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/30 "2000-08-12T20:17:51Z")
Slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter. ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/31 "2000-08-12T20:23:54Z")
As sharp as a pound of wet liver. ---
**Author:** ![FreakFreely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/48db29/32.png) [@FreakFreely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FreakFreely)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/32 "2000-08-12T20:28:53Z")
My dad always likes to call me “bongwater for brains”. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/33 "2000-08-12T20:50:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by AudreyK \* > \*\*Slinky’s kinked. > > \*\* Who told you? 5 RAM in a 25 RAM world. ---
**Author:** ![activgurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7cd45c/32.png) [@activgurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/activgurl)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/34 "2000-08-12T23:11:26Z")
If you put his brain on the edge of a razor blade, it would look like a BB rolling down the middle of an 4 lane highway. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/35 "2000-08-12T23:18:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Pink Slinky \* > \*\* > Who told you? > \*\* You did, just now. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![lee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lee/32/7455_2.png) [@lee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lee)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2000, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/36 "2000-08-12T23:30:29Z")
He’s not the sharpest knife in the deck! ---
**Author:** ![zenith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e19b73/32.png) [@zenith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zenith)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2000, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/37 "2000-08-13T06:11:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Zoing \* > \*\*Reminds me of that Queen song, “I’m going slightly mad.”(?) It has a lot of those phrases in there; however, I am too lazy to look up the lyrics. \*\* That’s the first thing I thought of when I saw this thread. I went and popped it in the CD player and then I got to you comment, so since I have the lyric out, here they are. When the outside temperature rises And the meaning is oh so clear One thousand and one yellow daffodils Begin to dance in front of you-oh dear Are they trying to tell you something? You’re missing that one final screw You’re simply not in the pink my dear To be honest you haven’t got a clue I’m going slightly mad I’m going slightly mad It finally happened-happened It finally happened-ooh oh It finally happened-I’m slightly mad Oh dear! I’m one card short of a full deck I’m not quite the shilling One wave short of a shipwreck I’m not my usual top billing I’m coming down with a fever I’m really out to sea This kettle is boiling over I think I’m a banana tree Oh dear, I’m going slightly mad I’m going slightly mad It finally happened, happened It finally happened uh huh It finally happened I’m slightly mad-oh dear! I’m knitting with only one needle Unravelling fast its true I’m driving only three wheels these days But my dear how about you? I’m going slightly mad I’m going slightly mad It finally happened It finally happened oh yes It finally happened I’m slightly mad! Just very slightly mad! And there you have it! ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2000, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014/38 "2000-08-13T13:16:37Z")
Ya know, these descriptions are also used to call someone insane. > [@](#): > > BNL, “Crazy”: > > The lights are on, but nobody’s home, > My elevator doesn’t go to the top, > I’m not playing with a full deck, > I’ve lost my marbles! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-colors-short-of-a-rainbow/29014.md?page=1)