# Two truths and a lie

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [February 8, 2000, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646 "2000-02-08T05:49:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 7

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**Author:** ![Spiritus\_Mundi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Spiritus\_Mundi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiritus_Mundi)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/121 "2000-02-09T07:17:00Z")

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For the record:  
**1) SM once gave a ride to serial killer Aileen Wournos**  
True. But I turned her down when she solicited me and dropped her off at a rest area without incident. Neeedless to say I was somewhat disturbed when I saw her on the news a few months later.

**2) SM once knocked out a world middleweight champion.**  
False. Though I did crack one of his ribs, which at least made him stop licking me in the head on his way to the decision.

**3) SM has been apprehended by the authorities (traffic violations excluded) in 3 countries.**  
True. Germany, Canada and the United States (polizei, customs, and military police, respectively).

More?

1. SM worked as a bodyguard for Melissa Etheridge.
2. SM was trusted by the military with the ability to fire nuclear capable missiles.
3. SM has never asked a woman out first.

* * *

- 

The best lack all conviction  
The worst are full of passionate intensity.  
\*

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**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 7:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/122 "2000-02-09T07:33:00Z")

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Hmm, lessee here:

1. Melin once had a cat given to her by a prince.

2. Melin graduated law school at the age of 21.

3. Melin once rolled her car backwards into Peter Falk’s.

-Melin

* * *

Siamese attack puppet – California

Still neglecting and overprotecting my children

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**Author:** ![kinoons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a698b9/32.png) [@kinoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kinoons)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/123 "2000-02-09T07:46:00Z")

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Allright, game on

1. I have delevered two babies (the woman did all the work)

2)I hang glide on a regular basis

1. I enjoy eating garlic salt

* * *

knuckle-dragging hose mongerer.  
SDMB Self-Righteous Clique

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**Author:** ![crackwise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/22d042/32.png) [@crackwise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crackwise)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/124 "2000-02-09T07:49:00Z")

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if anyone is still keeping count.

#1) **TRUE** I did once date a girl (when I dated her she was a girl (17)) who later dated the Prince of Spain (she was living in NYC and modeling by that time). A bunch of Spanish press was in our little hometown trying to find out the dirt on her. He eventually stopped dating her. She was essentially a nobody and he was royalty - I guess his folks had some say in who he gets to cheat on for the rest of his life.

#2 **TRUE** Why did so many people guess this one? I figure because I was responding to SmickD’s list - I thought his #2 was a lie, not mine. Anyway, I did finish off a pint on my own that evening. On the way home, a friend of mine had way too much to drink and was in a state where she was falling down and such and hurting herself - I guess I jumped into crisis mode and sobered up immediately. Such is. What a mundane thing to share about my life.

Anyway…

#3 yeah, this was the LIE. I should have been a little more detailed. There was a gymnast in one of my Stat. classes in college who I would have loved to have known better.

BTW, you all are so damn interesting

* * *

Never give a sword to a man who can’t dance.  
– a Celtic motto

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**Author:** ![WallyM7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WallyM7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WallyM7)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/125 "2000-02-09T07:56:00Z")

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Sue, # 1 is a lie.

Melin, #3 is a lie.

Do I know you guys like a book or what?

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**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/126 "2000-02-09T15:25:00Z")

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Mine:

> [@](#):
>
> 1. Shaun Cassidy sent me concert tickets in response to a fan letter.

**False**. I wrote to him when I was eight and waited, waited, waited for a response. Never got one. ::sniff::

> [@](#):
>
> 1. I shared an Austrian cable car with Bob Hope.

**True**. I was on a ski trip with my family. Mom and I were in a cable car (with about 15 other people) and thought we recognized Mr. Hope. The Stars and Stripes (Army newspaper) confirmed our sighting.

> [@](#):
>
> Mine:  
> 3. I was caught fellating my husband in public.

Embarrasing as hell and **true**. Way back in 1988, Heidelberg, Germany. When we were dating we’d have sex of all kinds everywhere we could. Only got caught once. One night we snuck down a flight of stairs leading to a basement in the building next to our neighborhood bar. I was getting down to business when an old German lady walked by and happened to look down. We were lucky. She laughed, wagged her finger at us and moved on.

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**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/127 "2000-02-09T15:47:00Z")

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Boy, are you guys sure I won’t spend that much on a shirt. Boy, are you guys ever wrong.

I was on a major weight-loss kick back in 1993-4, and I promised myself that if I got down to my target weight, I’d blow the money on that official Royals shirt, with my name and number (71 - my birth year) on it. I made it and blew the bucks on the official licensed merchandise. I’ve since un-made it, but have no intention of attempting to return the thing.

The correct answer was 2, $50 on a comic book. Most I ever spent on a single issue was $45.

Another triad from me, the baseball fan who lives in New York. I have:

1. Seen a major league game in Kauffman Stadium in Kansas City.
2. Seen a major league game in Fenway Park, Boston.
3. Seen a major league game in Oriole Park at Camden Yards, Baltimore.

Chaim Mattis Keller

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**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/128 "2000-02-09T15:53:00Z")

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Many people have posted two sets of three, so I’m just going to do six, and make **two** of them lies.

1. I can catch a dropped coin before it hits the bottom of water, like Jean Claude Van Damme in _Bloodsport_.

2. I’ve bowled a 300.

3. I’m related, through blood, to Madonna.

4. I’ve downed a gallon of milk in one sitting.

5. I’ve met Alice Cooper, spoken to him, and had no idea who he was until afterwards.

6. I’ve met Ozzy Osborne, spoken to him, and had no idea who he was until afterwards.

Melin, I’m guessing you didn’t graduate at 21.

Adam

* * *

“Life is hard…but God is good”

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**Author:** ![AWB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@AWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AWB)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/129 "2000-02-09T15:58:00Z")

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My answers (from page 1):

Canthearya said my #3 was a lie. Coldfire, Y2Sandgirl, and Imthecowgodmoo said #1 was. The winner is Canthearya. I fooled 3 out of 4! 😃

## FYI: [list=1][li]The gentleman is a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist who knew Jackie and introduced her to John F. Kennedy. He now writes a political newsletter and lives in DC. My mother was the receptionist for his dentist. He needed help with his office PC _years_ ago, so my mom offered me his name. I’ve been helping him with his office computers now for 11 years.[/li][li]I was at Dulles Int’l, dropping off my parents on their trip to Russia. But their airline (NW) had a big strike that had just started, so my parents got transferred to SpanAir.[/li] The SpanAir desk is in a quiet corner of the main terminal. The movie “Forces of Nature” was being filmed, and they had a small waiting area roped off. It was taking some time at SA, so I was just casually looking around and peering into the filming location. Once between takes, Ms. Bullock walked off the set and down a long roped-off “corridor” that went by SpanAir. She and I made eye contact, she smiled slightly, and went on her way. [li]My last name and Rob Lowe’s wife’s maiden name is the same. It’s also very uncommon, so I thought someone would make a connection. But then I forgot that I had changed my email address to my AOL one that doesn’t have my _full_ last name.[/list=1][/li]

What would Brian Boitano do / If he was here right now /  
He’d make a plan and he’d follow through / That’s what Brian Boitano would do.

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**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/130 "2000-02-09T16:07:00Z")

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OK, I’ll play your silly game …

MajorMD - 3

Spiritus - 3

Melin - 1

Kinoons - 3  
As for me …

1. Milo has had a girlfriend fake her death to break up with him.

2. Milo’s first cousin is a catcher for the Milwaukee Brewers.

3. Milo’s writings have been heard in dozens of countries throughout the world at the same time, on numerous occasions.

* * *

“You should tell the truth, expose the lies and live in the moment.” - Bill Hicks

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**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/131 "2000-02-09T16:20:00Z")

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I wanna play. . .

Diane has:

(1) Dated a pro athlete.

(2) Rolled a Jeep.

(3) Won a wet T-shirt contest at a Cheap Trick/Sammy Hagar concert.

* * *

You better be nice or I’ll sic my lackeys on ya.

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**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/132 "2000-02-09T16:27:00Z")

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1.) SwimmingRiddles hitchhiked to Montreal when her car broke down for the first Lilith Fair.  
\*\* True \*\* A friend and I were happily on our way, when my car started steaming at the Canadian boarder. I started kicking the bumper, screaming things not ready for prime time, and this guy leaned his head out of his car and said “Are you guys going to Lilith?” I screamed “Not ANY MORE!” He said “Hop in,” and I, pissed that my car had died, and that I had spent $40 on tickets I couldn’t use, screamed “I LOVE YOU!” My friend was not amused. We got there alive, and my father had to drive the 2 hours to pick us up, as our ride disappeared as soon as we got there.  
2.) SwimmingRiddles once spent 25 hours sleeping on 41st waiting for tickets to a certain Broadway show.  
\*\* True \*\* The show was Rent, back when it was cutting edge and cool. They used to have a deal where you waited forever on line, and paid $20 for front row tickets. I got to see most of the original Broadway cast, and Jesse L. Martin, who is now on Law and Order, winked at me from stage. LONG story.

3.)SwimmingRiddles has legally changed her first name, as it was “Noreen.”  
\*\* false \*\* I have a great-aunt Nora (as every Irish family does,) but no Noreen. I’m happy with my first name.

More options:

a.) SR has shared lunch with members of Soul Coughing.  
b.) Leonardo DiCaprio has been in SR’s car.  
C.) The former-MTV VJ Kennedy has called SR “sassy.”

one of those is on another thread, but it’s one of my proudest moments…

* * *

Habit rules the unreflecting herd. - Wordsworth

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/133 "2000-02-09T16:46:00Z")

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And **Coldy** , fellate is a verb. My U.S. Government dictionary did not list it, but my unabridged one at home did.

Here’s what [Merriam-Webster Online](http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary) had to say:

Main Entry: fel·late  
Pronunciation: 'fe-"lAt, f&-'lAt  
Function: verb  
Inflected Form(s): fel·lat·ed; fel·lat·ing  
Etymology: back-formation from fellatio  
Date: 1948  
transitive senses : to perform fellatio on  
intransitive senses : to fellate someone

- fel·la·tor /-"lA-t&r, -'lA-t&r/ noun

Learn somethin’ new every day don’t we, O Dutch One?

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**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/134 "2000-02-09T17:11:00Z")

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time to tell the truth…

1. JL crowdsurfed into the path of Maxim Reality  
true… at a gig in 1996 in Cork. I got on the Big TV screen with him before being dragged away by security.

2. JL was told to “Fuck off” by Thom Yorke (lead singer with Radiohead) false. he signed an autograph and then dissapeared into a record store on a street in Dublin about 2 years ago.

3. JL was mistakenly arrested for bothering sheep. True, Clog Boy!!! on a drunken weekend in Bantry Co. Cork, about 5 of us were arrested for " trespassing private property and bothering sheep". What really happened was one of us ran into a field in the middle of the night drunk, and started screaming at sheep. It wasnt me. I swear.  
they questioned all of us for the tresspassing thing, but let us go in the end. I swear I went to my Hotel room as soon as we left the bar… 🙂

* * *

J  
“We should have as high a regard for the church so as to keep it out of as many things as possible”

Fluther Good -the Shadow of a Gunman.  
Sean O’Casey

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**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/135 "2000-02-09T17:46:00Z")

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Since none of you know me, you have a 1 in 3 chance of picking the lie.

StG has been arrested for rioting in a European airport.

StG has helped her vet castrate her horse.

StG’s two best friends are a pre-op M.F transexual who wants to be a lesbian, and a multiple personality with over 60 alters.

Good luck.

StG

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**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/136 "2000-02-09T17:47:00Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Originally posted by JohnLarrigan:  
> **time to tell the truth…  
> 2. JL was told to “Fuck off” by Thom Yorke (lead singer with Radiohead) false. he signed an autograph and then dissapeared into a record store on a street in Dublin about 2 years ago.**

Damn. I thought that was one of the more amusing things I had heard in a while. Hey, can I pass these stories off as my own?

* * *

Habit rules the unreflecting herd. - Wordsworth

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**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/137 "2000-02-09T17:51:00Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Originally posted by StGermain:  
> \*\*StG’s two best friends are a pre-op M.F transexual who wants to be a lesbian, and a multiple personality with over 60 alters.  
> \*\*

I guess this one, because otherwise you’d have said your 62 best friends…

* * *

Habit rules the unreflecting herd. - Wordsworth

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![AWB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@AWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AWB)\
**Post date:** [February 10, 2000, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/138 "2000-02-10T06:08:00Z")

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## Of the lastest:[ul][li]Milossarian: #1 (wasn’t this the plot of a Three’s Company?)[/li][li]Diane: #2[/li][li]SwimmingRiddles: #2[/li][li]StGermain: #3[/ul][/li]New ones for me:[list=1][li]My office overlooks the White House.[/li][li]During the Tickle-Me-Elmo craze, I noticed how quickly they were going when they first came out. I bought a few, and made about $1500 profit.[/li][li]My brother was a professional downhill skier.[/list=1][/li]

What would Brian Boitano do / If he was here right now /  
He’d make a plan and he’d follow through / That’s what Brian Boitano would do.

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**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\
**Post date:** [February 10, 2000, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/139 "2000-02-10T06:44:00Z")

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• OpalCat has been arrested for felony Grand Theft Auto, but managed to talk the prosecution into lowering the charge to joyriding.  
**TRUE** - when I ran away from home, I took my car, which was in my mom’s name. She had me arrested for stealing it.  
• OpalCat once had 3 competing meth/coke dealers sleeping in her house at once. All have since been in and out of prison.  
**TRUE** - I had some weird friends, and my house was a sort of crash pad for a while.  
• OpalCat once stabbed an IV drug user in the foot with a [knife](http://fathom.org/opalcat/cam/opalcamknife4.jpg) she made herself out of a bar of steel.  
**FALSE** - I did make the knife, but he stabbed _himself_ in the foot with it, when he stuck it into his boot.

More?

• OpalCat has been kissed on the cheek by Steve Case  
• OpalCat has danced topless for one of her former high school teachers.  
• OpalCat dropped out of high school.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2000, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/two-truths-and-a-lie/13646/140 "2000-02-09T20:13:00Z")

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First, the answer to my last post.  
1.) Once acted as security for Al Gore.  
True. Back in college, I was a big supporter of the Clinton-Gore campaign (oh, the folly of youth), and when Al Gore came to the UMCP campus to make a speech, I got picked to stand on the outside of the crowd and hassle the Young Republicans who were trying to hassle Gore. No Young Republicans showed up (I don’t think any existed on campus, actually), so I just got to watch the speech.

2.) Once made ‘Weird Al’ Yankovic laugh.  
True. I made a comment to him while he gave me his autograph, and he laughed at it. Not a guffaw, certainly not side-splitting, gasping-for-air laughter. But he laughed, And I felt like the coolest person in the world for the next couple of hours.

3.) Once accidentally spilled soda on Seth Green.  
False. Geez, y’all can see right through my lies, huh?  
My guesses:  
NTG: #3. You’ve double-posted, I’m sure of it.  
MajorMD: #2.  
Melin: #2.  
cmkeller: #3. If you’re a baseball fan from _New York_, something tells me going to see the Orioles would be low on any of your priorities.  
AGR220: #3 & #6.  
Milossarian: #2.  
Diane: #1.  
Swimming: a.  
StG: Your two best friends.  
AWB: Your office doesn’t overlook the White House.  
OpalCat: You were never kissed by Steve Case.

And my challenge:  
1.) John Corrado’s great-grandfather was killed by the Black Hand.

2.) John Corrado’s grandfather was run out of town by the Capone Mob.

3.) John Corrado’s uncle Jim is in the witness protection program after testifying against the Mob.

* * *

JMCJ

This is not a sig.

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