# Uekte: You are a fuckface of the highest order **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 12, 2002, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693 "2002-06-12T19:19:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Uekte](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/919ad9/32.png) [@Uekte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uekte)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/81 "2002-06-13T04:30:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rhum Runner \* > \*\* > Um, well, see that is where I lost you. If your GQ had been, “Once the police came and took away my senile neighbor… how do I get that started again” or some such then I would believe you. But that isn’t what you asked. Nor did you mention at any point in the other thread that you had ever seen someone taken into custody in this manner. It seems to me that such experience would have been relevant in your short-lived GQ, and since you failed to mention it, I think you are lying. In point of fact you seemed to be surprised and delighted to learn that the police had this power at all, again this is confusing to me now that you claim to have seen this very power exercised in person. Troll on. \*\* I was excited because Dooku said I could call an old folks home and have them observed. But he lied about it. I didn’t know that anyone could call the cops and have them removed, which is why I asked the question. And what happened when they hauled my neighbor growing up was a huge spectacle. It even made the local paper - “old man forced to leave his home.” So of course his family was there, and no, he didn’t require constant care. They were there to make sure they hauled him away. And what would mentioning this have to do with my GQ thread? I asked a very straightforward question, I didn’t see the need to add more than was necessary. But then, I don’t double-post, either. If you believe I’m a troll, then why do you keep reading and posting yourself? Oh, I see now - low post count guy wants the regulars to notice him, so he joins in a pile on. Relax, there’s always room for one more sycophant. > [@](#): > > I’ve had broken bones myself, and NEWSFLASH! you don’t die from them. > > Trespassing, again. Malicious mischief. Illegal. > > Still trespassing. Why couldn’t you have simply asked the property owner if you could retrieve your ball? > > Imagine you’re a homeowner and the guys next door drive through your yard, throw loud parties, and make so much noise in general that you can hear them inside your home. Imagine that you’re not as spry as you once were and that these neighbors of yours are clearly not concerned with your feelings or rights. Would you approach them yourself, or call the police? Would you be Uetke, or would you be one of the neighbors? Are you reading what I write at all, shithead? For the THIRD time, I have _never_ driven through a log pile. If you weren’t in such a blather about joining in, you’d see that it was the teenagers that lived up the street when I was in 6th grade. The reason I couldn’t “simply ask the property owner” is because he was our crazy old neighbor that always yelled at us. Did you not put it together that politely asking an old man that yells at kids wouldn’t have done any good? And once again, we DID NOT drive through someone’s yard. Had you read what I wrote, you’d have read that. And what sort of a cold motherfucker are YOU to call a little kid going to get his ball trespassing? You’ve got some nerve. And speaking of nerve, that broken bone comment was despicable. My little sister was crying and screaming with her broken arm, and the ambulance wasn’t coming, and she was scared. If you are too stupid to figure out that this would be a very, very big deal to a little girl, then good luck with kids of your own. NEWSFLASH!! She was scared to death, and this old asshole responded to her tragedy by LAUGHING. What would motivate you to say something like that? In fact, what would motivate you to respond to this thread at all, since you obviously think I’m lying? Oh, now I remember - you’ve got the same urge as Rhum Runner. Well, the more sycophants, the better. ---
**Author:** ![Squish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Squish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squish)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/82 "2002-06-13T04:31:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Grimace \* > **And if you were driving through _MY_ Yard, to fuck up my leaves, you would find something a hell of a lot more damaging than a log.** \ Yes, I’ve always had a fondness for razor wire, myself. Ahem, to return to the coals: **uetke** , you are the misbegotten son of a syphilitic whore. Your teeth are encrusted with smegma and the remains of the nose-pickings that are your diet. You are such an asshole that you leak through a thousand openings every time you swallow. Not only do women and men shun your scurvilous, louse-ridden, boil-covered skin-sack, but so do goats, sheep and donkeys. Your brain is naught but food for maggots. Dogs would refuse to bury your bones. You are taking up air that could be better used for the transportation of plague. You are such a waste of skin that not even Ed Gein would have a use for you. ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/83 "2002-06-13T04:33:22Z")
Uekte, why not just come back once you’re past your fifth birthday? It’s people like you that I wish I had banning priviledges. Not for you’re opinions, but because of the way you hold them and the way that you’re just a natural asshole. ---
**Author:** ![Uekte](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/919ad9/32.png) [@Uekte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uekte)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/84 "2002-06-13T04:34:44Z")
> [@](#): > > Stupid-stupid-Stupid-stupid-Stupid-stupid-I am so dumb. Stupid-stupid-Stupid-stupid-Stupid-STOOOOPID! I’m a prick, I’m a prick, I’m a big fat prick. > > Uetke, may I suggest that you grow up? Yeah sorry I’m so immature. I still say “dumb bitch” is appropriate, don’t you? ---
**Author:** ![Daowajan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@Daowajan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daowajan)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/85 "2002-06-13T04:41:14Z")
**alice\_in\_wonderland** has pulled things off the bottom of her shoe that were smarter than you. May you live a long, long, long life, and may you have grandchildren who put you in a substandard nursing home. ---
**Author:** ![Uekte](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/919ad9/32.png) [@Uekte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uekte)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/86 "2002-06-13T04:43:16Z")
Thanks for that extra pile-on there, Squishy. Since there’s no way you could have posted it before my 11:30 post, it only further proves my point, sycophant. Preview and I see we have another low post count wannabe chiming in to kick me. Quite humorous having you call me a natural asshole, since Indiana is the US’s natural asshole. Maybe you guys should hire me as a recruiter for the yesman club? Tell you what - I’ll go away, and you can all keep this thread alive for another few days or so, then light up cigars. Then later you can all IM each other and see if there’s any tresspassing children to go report to the proper authorities. See you all when you’re old and I’m in the lobby that decides what to do with you. Adios. ---
**Author:** ![Jurhael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@Jurhael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurhael)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/87 "2002-06-13T04:43:45Z")
“I still say “dumb bitch” is appropriate, don’t you?” This is more appropriate for the likes of you! Squish: “uetke, you are the misbegotten son of a syphilitic whore. Your teeth are encrusted with smegma and the remains of the nose-pickings that are your diet. You are such an asshole that you leak through a thousand openings every time you swallow. Not only do women and men shun your scurvilous, louse-ridden, boil-covered skin-sack, but so do goats, sheep and donkeys. Your brain is naught but food for maggots. Dogs would refuse to bury your bones. You are taking up air that could be better used for the transportation of plague. You are such a waste of skin that not even Ed Gein would have a use for you.” ---
**Author:** ![Daowajan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@Daowajan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daowajan)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/88 "2002-06-13T04:45:19Z")
Don’t let the doorknob hit you in the ass on the way out. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Rhum\_Runner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rhum\_Runner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhum_Runner)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/89 "2002-06-13T04:47:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Uekte \* > \*\*I have _never_ driven through a log pile. \*\* Well, I’m glad you have managed to avoid _that_ obstacle in life. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Uekte \*\*\* > And speaking of nerve, that broken bone comment was despicable. My little sister was crying and screaming with her broken arm, and the ambulance wasn’t coming, and she was scared. \*\* Maybe if your car wasn’t on blocks in the front yard your family could have taken your sister/cousin/girlfriend to the hospital without an ambulance, but as you say the only ambulance in your small town was at your next door neighbor’s house, I can see how it must have been difficult to get their attention. Rhum “Low Count Sycophant” Runner Troll ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/90 "2002-06-13T04:47:20Z")
Sorry, I forgot some things. Please excuse me. Uekte, why do you keep posting? Everytime you post something new, you just give us new fuel to burn off of. Why not sprout a brain (miracles do happen occasionally) and see that? Also, would you like to come out and see my 93 year-old great grandfather? The one who lives in a small house, doesn’t drive any more after dark because he realizes that he can’t, and isn’t a hazard to anybody? Maybe then you’d realize that maybe old folks are useless pieces of shit, unlike yourself. You know, if you listened to one, you might actually learn something. In any case, at least we found out what magazine you jerk off to in the bathroom. ---
**Author:** ![Lesath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/df788c/32.png) [@Lesath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lesath)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/91 "2002-06-13T04:47:25Z")
Wow, he knows when to quit. Even if it did take awhile to beat the message through that thick skull of his. I like the ego-inflating “I’m leaving because you’re all mean and I’m better than you!” final post. ---
**Author:** ![Jurhael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@Jurhael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurhael)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/92 "2002-06-13T04:48:49Z")
“Tell you what - I’ll go away” Good, do so. I’m sure there’ll be plenty of others who can and will replace you. The only unfortunate thing is that people here won’t have target practice for a little while. "Since there’s no way you could have posted it before my 11:30 post, it only further proves my point, sycophant. " Did it ever occur to you for a second that a whole bunch of people can agree on a certain thing WITHOUT asskissing or even sharing the same brain. Geee…what a concept! “See you all when you’re old and I’m in the lobby that decides what to do with you. Adios.” What makes you so certain that it won’t be the other way around? ---
**Author:** ![Squish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Squish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squish)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/93 "2002-06-13T04:49:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Uekte \* > **So of course his family was there, and no, he didn’t require constant care.** You know this for a fact? > [@](#): > > \*\*They were there to make sure they hauled him away. \*\* You know this for a fact? > [@](#): > > **If you believe I’m a troll, then why do you keep reading and posting yourself?** Aren’t you paying attention? I never said I believed you were a troll. I’m reading partly because I find you despicable and partly because I’m laughing big loud belly laughs. > [@](#): > > **For the THIRD time, I have _never_ driven through a log pile.** Good thing–them thar logs kin be hard on yer vehicle. LOL! If you never did it, why do you have your panties in a wad over it? > [@](#): > > **The reason I couldn’t “simply ask the property owner” is because he was our crazy old neighbor that always yelled at us. Did you not put it together that politely asking an old man that yells at kids wouldn’t have done any good?** Can you not put it together that me probably would never have yelled at you in the first place if you’d respected his property and treated him with civility? > [@](#): > > **And what sort of a cold motherfucker are YOU to call a little kid going to get his ball trespassing? You’ve got some nerve.** Yep. Got a lot of nerve. Comes from being properly **raised** instead of being allowed to “jes’ grow.” Had I _ever_ trespassed on anyone’s properly, or continually thrown my toys into someone else’s yard, I would have been reprimanded by my parents and made to apologize to the neighbor. > [@](#): > > **And speaking of nerve, that broken bone comment was despicable.** **All** of your comments so far have been despicable. You sicken me, you pus-sac, or haven’t you gotten that through your rot-ridden excuse for a brain yet? > [@](#): > > **My little sister was crying and screaming with her broken arm, and the ambulance wasn’t coming, and she was scared.** She was scared, she wasn’t dying or in danger. Judging your parents from the way they raised **you** , obviously they didn’t give enough of a shit to comfort her and give her a cup of tea and some aspirin until the ambulance got there. For that matter, they \*\* didn’t give enough of a SHIT\*\* to drive her to a doctor **themselves**. No, your parents didn’t give a SHIT about their kids: they fucked, they popped you out with less care than a chicken with an egg, then they relied on everyone but themselves to assume responsibility for you. In fact, get your parents’ sorry asses in here so I can ask them what gave them the **right** to release a sociopathic little waste of resources such as yourself upon society. > [@](#): > > **What would motivate you to say something like that?** Common sense: nobody dies from a broken bone. Wonderment: why on earth didn’t your parents take her to a doctor themselves. Here’s another newsflash, you moron: someone in an ER with nothing more than a broken bone is way low on the priority list and probably won’t get treatment for at least an hour. > [@](#): > > \*\* In fact, what would motivate you to respond to this thread at all, since you obviously think I’m lying?\*\* I don’t think you’re lying. I think you’re an absolute waste of a sperm cell, a sociopath, an idiot, a moron, the pathetic result of parental neglect and indifference with a chip on his shoulder that’s painted with a great big red “MORON” sign. ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/94 "2002-06-13T04:52:07Z")
What’s this about Indiana’s the US’s natural asshole? I seem to remember somebody here who got a little testy over somebody making a joke about people in Texas being hauled off. . . And, sure, I may have a low post count. Excuse me for having other things to do. Helping out at umpiring Little League, coaching a Pony league team, and helping mentally handicapped kids takes some time. Oh, and that’s just stuff in the summer. ---
**Author:** ![Rhum\_Runner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rhum\_Runner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhum_Runner)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/95 "2002-06-13T04:56:40Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Squish \* > \*\* Aren’t you paying attention? I never said I believed you were a troll. I’m reading partly because I find you despicable and partly because I’m laughing big loud belly laughs._\* Ehm, I think that particular piece of phlem was for my benefit. I was the one who called our friend the Troll. I must say this thread has made what would have otherwise been a tedious night of Excel pretty entertaining. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/96 "2002-06-13T04:56:40Z")
**Awwwwright kiddies, step up and place yer bets!!** I got the following: He’ll be back: **Even** He’ll be back within 24 hours: **3-2** He’s a sock: **3-2** His next post will be in this thread: **3-1** His next post will be ban-worthy: **7-2** His next post will be a qualified, backhanded apology: **10-1** His next post will be an unqualified apology for being a shit: **100-1** Roll in, folks! We’re open all night! ---
**Author:** ![KillerFig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/51bf81/32.png) [@KillerFig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KillerFig)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/97 "2002-06-13T04:56:43Z")
Damn, man. I generally don’t post here, except in the occasional Cafe Society thread, but I just felt like I had to chime in here. Uekte, I’m a year younger than you, I’m fairly immature and consider myself pretty much a kid–but God, man, you’re worse than me. When did Dooku lie? Here’s his post: > [@](#): > > Well, one of my good friends, who lives in Dallas, is a Nursing Home Administrator. He has the authority to call social services, or whatever they were called, and have a senior citizen placed under observation for 72 hours. I know b/c he did that very thing to one of his neighbors, who he determined was clearly a danger to herself and others. So, in your home state, if you know someone who runs a nursing home, you can ask them to do it. You evidently called some nursing homes and said “Hey, my neighborhood’s full of jerks who complain when my music’s too loud or when my car’s parked in the wrong space, which has ruined my life in ways you could never possibly comprehend. Put the whole town away!” The nursing home service representative with whom you spoke said “Well, uhhh…we don’t do that.” Look, anyone–ANYONE–can have anyone–ANYONE–temporarily taken away for psychological observation, but, (here’s the part you seem to be having difficulty with) there has to be a REASON for it. Someone being a jerk (which I don’t doubt your neighbors are, although I am pretty amused by this log idea) does not mean that they are psychologically unstable in such a way as to be threats to themselves and/or others. It just means they’re jerks. Dooku’s friend has the authority to call and have someone under his care taken away, and because of his position as a nursing home director, he is taken to be credible and his opinion is respected. He is not, however, a cop–he can’t patrol the streets and take people away himself. It’s not his job to round up the old guys in your neighborhood. If they’re actually a threat to themselves and others, then call 911 and an ambulance will come take them to a mental hospital. You’ll need some evidence to justify the request, of course, and “He told me to turn my music down” won’t cut it. Christ, man, get a fucking belt sander and file down that thick skull of yours. -KillerFig ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/98 "2002-06-13T04:57:19Z")
Damn, he left? I guess I got too worked up to see that. Well, Uekte, where ever you may be, may you live a long, unhealthy life in a substandard nursing home with nobody to visit you. I know somebody already said something about the substandard nursing home, but I forgot who it was. Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Daowajan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@Daowajan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daowajan)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/99 "2002-06-13T04:58:58Z")
me. awwww, I was just getting all fired up. ---
**Author:** ![VDarlin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/e56c9b/32.png) [@VDarlin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VDarlin)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2002, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693/100 "2002-06-13T05:00:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Uekte \* > \*\*When I was in the 6th grade, he called the ambulance and DEMANDED that they come over and deal with his swollen finger or whatever, while at the same time my sister broke her arm and was sitting there, waiting for the ambulance that he had tied up with his bullshit. When I told him about that a few days later, he laughed his ass off - LAUGHED in my face when I told him about my sister. \*\* Yes, it sounds like this guy was a bastard, but… **BUT** , it doesn’t sound like you’re any higher up the food chain. What do you do if you have a swollen finger, “or whatever”? Drive yourself, or have someone else drive you, to the doctor, and have it looked at. What do you do if you break your arm, or any other bone in your body? Drive yourself(if you can), or have someone else, drive you to the doctor, and have it looked at, and x-ray’s taken. I have known many, many, people who have successfully broken bones in their lives, and not one of them ever called an ambulance to come and treat them/transport them to the hospital for such a minor injury(yes, minor). Whose to say that there wasn’t some guy across town, whose wife had called the ambulance, due to her husband having just suffered a heart attack, and had she known what a couple of selfish “children”(old guy included) were doing across town to tie them up, she’d have been bitching about you as well, and her husband might not have died. Oh, yeah, well that guy was most likely old, if he had a heart attack, so, fuck him, right? JeeeeZUs are you pathetic! ~V \<-- yes, another lowly, low post count, bandwagon jumper [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uekte-you-are-a-fuckface-of-the-highest-order/113693.md?page=6)