# UK vs Texas **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 17, 2004, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731 "2004-10-17T23:15:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2004, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/1 "2004-10-17T23:15:49Z")
Talk of a secessionist Texas repelling a foreign army in [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=281381) made me think: could an independent Texas repel the combined British armed forces? > [@](#): > > In case of a foreign invasion, we have the Texas National Guard and the Texas Air National Guard. We don’t have an army, but since everybody down here has at least 6 rifles and a pile of ammo, we can raise an army in 24 hours if we need it. Texas has a slightly larger land area than the UK. The population is just over 22 million, which is over a third of the population of the UK. As mentioned in the other thread, Texans don’t have an army, but the general populous is armed to the teeth. The UK has highly trained and (we are led to believe) generally admired armed forces. The RAF has a large number of planes, with extremely able pilots. Also, a sophisticated navy, with a large number of nuclear hunter-killer subs. There’s also the little matter of the SAS, who are akin to the Navy Seals in being highly trained, intelligent, mean-ass killing machines. But compared to the population of able bodied Texans with a gun to fire, the British armed forces lose drastically in numbers. The UK has nukes too, but let’s leave the nukes out of the equation for this silliness. So, given the criteria mentioned in the other thread, could the Brits take an independent Texas (and all the Black Gold), or would we get our asses kicked? ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2004, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/2 "2004-10-17T23:31:46Z")
Texas may have a large population, a lot of which are well armed, but I doubt very seriously it will hold out well against one of the world’s premier armed forces. Without the rest of the nation helping it, Texas would fall to Britain pretty easily although expect the ensuing rebellion to be at least a hundred times worse than the one currently being fought in Iraq ---
**Author:** ![ouisey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9fc29f/32.png) [@ouisey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouisey)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2004, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/3 "2004-10-17T23:45:37Z")
I dunno, those Texans can be pretty insane. I could imagine Texan Rage (Don’t Mess with Texas, and all that) taking over when confronted with an army trying to trespass on their land. Don’t underestimate Texan Rage. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/4 "2004-10-18T00:16:39Z")
> [@ouisey](#): > > Don’t underestimate Texan Rage. You take the Texan Rage. I’ll take the well trained, armed, and supported military force with tanks and aircraft. ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/5 "2004-10-18T00:31:01Z")
> [@ouisey](#): > > I dunno, those Texans can be pretty insane. I could imagine Texan Rage (Don’t Mess with Texas, and all that) taking over when confronted with an army trying to trespass on their land. > > Don’t underestimate Texan Rage. [Texas rage](http://eteamz.active.com/texasrage/index.cfm?) is a “christian based” girls basketball teams that fosters a “positive” enviroment for improving basketball skills. I don’t think that they have a prayer. On the other hand, the [Austin Rage](http://www.austinragefootball.net/) might. “Don’t mess with Texas” is the department of transportation’s anti-littering slogan, but you knew that… right? ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/6 "2004-10-18T00:55:10Z")
Yeah, just yew, go ahead an’ try to bring your tea an’ bisquite eat’n asses over here an’ see if yew don’t get your asses kicked… Ats’ all I’m say’n… Seriously though, this would be no contest. The UK has superior armed forces. Seems like I rember vaguely; Was it Sam Houston or some other Texas Icon that offered to help the brits out (over what the dispute was I can’t remember) way back when. Only except our president at the time refused to let them go?? I don’t know it’s too vague a memory; It was something like that though/… ---
**Author:** ![Celyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@Celyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Celyn)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/7 "2004-10-18T00:55:46Z")
Aaarrgghh! :eek: : But the U.K. does not WANT Texas! ---
**Author:** ![Xgemina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/b5e925/32.png) [@Xgemina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xgemina)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/8 "2004-10-18T01:50:20Z")
Yeah, but does the Independent Republic of Texas have the military assets that are currently based in it? federal and state? or just state? or only militia? If we’re talking state militia only, then it should be fairly easy for the UK to roll in. But if they have their TX National Guard units (the big ones being the 49th Armor and 36th Infantry along with 3 fighter wings from the Air Guard (147th, 149th and 204th(?)) things get a little hairier. Then there are all of the Federal units based in TX…1st Cavalry, 4th Infantry, 21st Aviation BDE (Apaches) and a whole bunch of Air Force stuff. (The 3rd ACR used to be there as well but they’ve moved to Carson. Now Ft. Bliss is home to 4 ADA BDEs and the 32nd Air and Missle Defense Command. If it flies in West Texas it dies.) Throwing in the Federal Reserve units probably adds at least a BDE of Infantry and corp support artillery assets (the big guns) plus the odds and ends like medical support While I think the UK would prevail in the end, it would be a bit costly and require more forces than you think. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/9 "2004-10-18T01:51:50Z")
Just a thought. I’d have to assume that were there an independent Texas, it would have developed more defensive resources than the current National Guard units. We would undoubtably have reactivated the Texas Navy. We do build several weapons systems for the federal government here, so you could assume that we’d have quite a few, say, F-16s on hand. And dabble in the Realpolitik. Should an independent Texas coexist peacefully on the North American continent with the remainder of the U.S., I suspect we’d easily be able to enlist the U.S.’ help in thwarting an invasion from any shore. UK v. Texas + the U.S. - I know where my money stands. 'Course, I’m probably biased. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/10 "2004-10-18T02:04:16Z")
If Texas were to secede, I doubt very seriously that the US would care overmuch if the UK invaded especially since I don’t imagine the UK would be the aggressors in such a war. And **Xgemina** , you’re forgetting that a lot of the things you are mentioning are federal, not state. If we pulled out, we’d be taking our toys and soldiers with us, not to mention plenty of Texans that would prefer to be American. The Texan nation would hemorrhage people like crazy. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/11 "2004-10-18T02:04:59Z")
Two weeks into the war… British forces are everywhere. There is no longer any organised resistance from Texas forces. A kindly Tommy helps a frail little old Texas lady across the street. At the median, she whips out her late husband’s Peacemaker and scatters British brains across the intersection. A cute Texas cheerleader walks down the street. Tommy heads turn to watch her strut. Her quarterback boyfried fires a pefect spiral with the Molotov, right down the hatch of the Scorpion. Off-duty SAS units try the local cuisine…something called “chili.” A squad spontaneously combusts. The Brits retreat with their tails between their legs, begging to be assigned to someplace inhabitable, like Yemen. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Tiggrkitty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tiggrkitty/32/17966_2.png) [@Tiggrkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tiggrkitty)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/12 "2004-10-18T02:35:08Z")
I am amazed at some of the subject matter that pops up on SDMB. Why would the UK want Texas? It’s hotter than hell here and you wimpy Brits would roast during our summer months. You think 80 degrees is hot? That is a mild spring. Try 115 degrees in June. Amazing. UK invading Texas. It’s laughable at best. ---
**Author:** ![Jojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecd19e/32.png) [@Jojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jojo)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/13 "2004-10-18T02:43:30Z")
I, for one, think that Texas would welcome it’s new British overlords. We would treat you well and allow you to continue with most of your quaint customs and “ball games”. We might have to make a few changes but, in time, you would come to see that they were for the best. I don’t know about anyone else but I’m up for it. Britain should be financially supporting the Texan Independence cause just so that we can pick an argument with them later and get all that lovely black gold. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/14 "2004-10-18T03:00:55Z")
> [@Tiggrkitty](#): > > I am amazed at some of the subject matter that pops up on SDMB. > > Why would the UK want Texas? It’s hotter than hell here and you wimpy Brits would roast during our summer months. You think 80 degrees is hot? That is a mild spring. Try 115 degrees in June. > > Amazing. UK invading Texas. It’s laughable at best. Does Egypt, Sudan, Guyana, Belize, the West Indies, Yemen, Bhutan, Papua New Guina, Brunei, India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Iraq, Kuwait, Israel, Oman, Qatar, Malaysia, Singapore, or Australia ring a bell? It’s a safe bet that all of them have worse summers than Texas and Britain held them all. At the same time. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/15 "2004-10-18T03:05:10Z")
> [@](#): > > We might have to make a few changes but, in time, you would come to see that they were for the best. Fuck with our guns and it’s 1776 all over again. ---
**Author:** ![Malodorous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Malodorous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malodorous)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/16 "2004-10-18T03:22:59Z")
> [@Tiggrkitty](#): > > Why would the UK want Texas? It’s hotter than hell here and you wimpy Brits would roast during our summer months. You think 80 degrees is hot? That is a mild spring. Try 115 degrees in June. > > Amazing. UK invading Texas. It’s laughable at best. Maybe the UK would be afraid Argentina would get it? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/17 "2004-10-18T03:23:10Z")
Texas still has the Texas Rangers. “One riot, one Ranger” or somethin’ like that, right? Just how many riots can the Brits start at once? My vote’s with Texas. ---
**Author:** ![TitoBenito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2acd7d/32.png) [@TitoBenito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TitoBenito)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/18 "2004-10-18T03:46:10Z")
If the British want black gold invading Texas would not be a good way to get it. Besides off shore rigs Texas doesn’t have enough to make a big invasion really worth it. It would be easier to just blockade the ports and steal all the oil from there. Better yet invade Alaska, more oil and close to a friendly territory that shares a queen with you. ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/19 "2004-10-18T06:20:11Z")
> [@Jojo](#): > > I, for one, think that Texas would welcome it’s new British overlords. We would treat you well and allow you to continue with most of your quaint customs and “ball games”. We might have to make a few changes but, in time, you would come to see that they were for the best. A British invasion of Texas could lead to the possibility of that loathsome, destructive plague – SOCCER – finally getting a foothold in these parts, meaning that I would have to fight to the death to prevent it. ---
**Author:** ![Israfel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/87869e/32.png) [@Israfel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Israfel)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731/20 "2004-10-18T06:40:14Z")
Exactly how many Texans are actually armed anyway? As someone who has lived in Texas for 20 or so years, I have to say, not only do I not know anyone who owns a gun, but the only guns I’ve even _seen_ in real life (as opposed to in movies or something) were on the holsters of police officers. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/uk-vs-texas/269731.md?page=2)