# Ultimate Rochambo Fighter Arena **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 3, 2000, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513 "2000-11-03T04:12:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/241 "2001-01-12T17:46:22Z")
Ha! Your **Government Downsizing** can easily be defeated by **Mayor Richard Daley of Chicago** and **The Ronald Reagan Building**. As for your **Bubblegum Pop (etc)**. Pffft. A **Jim Jarmusch Film Festival** should dissipate its cloying tones in no time. ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/242 "2001-01-12T17:50:27Z")
And excuse me while I prepare my **livestock catapult from Monty Python and the Holy Grail** and **fart in the general direction** of your **throng of rabid vegans**. ---
**Author:** ![Busta\_Rib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/45deac/32.png) [@Busta\_Rib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Busta_Rib)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/243 "2001-01-12T18:18:27Z")
At times, the best offense if of the mind, not the body. I parry your **livestock catapult from Monty Python and the Holy Grail** and your **flatulence volleyed in my vicinity** with the **Vulcan Mind Meld** to contaminate you with my impure thoughts. And then to befuddle you, I jab with the [Inane Lyrics of Chumbawamba](http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Basement/8448/cwltts.html)!! You’ll be madder than Admiral Stockdale during a Vice Presidential debate after only two verses!! ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/244 "2001-01-12T18:20:52Z")
My **“Pocket Tornado”** dashes your\*\* general direction farting\*\*. I’ll deliver a cripling strike with my **6-socket power strip with broken circuit breaker reset switch**. Take that. ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/245 "2001-01-12T18:42:40Z")
Your **impure thoughts** cause me to have a psychic orgasm, and you are blinded by my **afterglow**. And **Chumbawumba** is no match for **The California Raisins**. That should hold you off for a while. Now, as for **thinksnow** - you should know better to use faulty protection, especially with the **Pocket Tornado**. Tsk, tsk, tsk. I’ll simply plug all the outlets your **6-socket power with broken circuit breaker reset switch** with **plastic sporks, still covered with the Colonel’s secret recipe**. ---
**Author:** ![foxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@foxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foxfyre)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/246 "2001-01-12T18:42:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Scupper \* > \*\ ***‘Several Species of Small, furry animals in a cave and grooving with a Pict’, by Pink Floyd** is entirely disrupted by **A Confetti-Like Cloud of Timothy Leary Portrait-Emblazoned Blotter Acid!!!** > _Paper wraps Rock. In this case, classic rock._ \*\* Wow, good one, Scupper. Oh, and I too added the BustaRib comment to my sig. (I wasnt copying you, JR8, I did it before you did…Besides, copying is the most sincere form of flattery) Now let me stand back and watch the action while I figure out a decent attack… -Fox ---
**Author:** ![foxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@foxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foxfyre)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/247 "2001-01-12T18:48:01Z")
Ok magdeline, try a **Genetically Altered Monkey with Glow-In-The-Dark Octopus Jeans** [http://my.aol.com/news/news\_story.psp?type=1&cat=0200&id=0101120044440316](http://my.aol.com/news/news_story.psp?type=1&cat=0200&id=0101120044440316) -Fox ---
**Author:** ![Scupper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Scupper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scupper)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/248 "2001-01-12T19:11:28Z")
I deftly parry your **Genetically Altered Monkey with Glow-In-The-Dark Octopus Genes** with **Flesh-Eating Bacteria!** And as my attack, I deal out a vicious **AOL-Time Warner Merger!!!** ---
**Author:** ![foxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@foxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foxfyre)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/249 "2001-01-12T19:31:21Z")
Argh Foiled once again by Scupper. That attack was meant for magdeline. I sense some type of alliance here. No matter I will prevail. I counter your **AOL-Time Warner Merger!!!** with a **Federal Trade Commission Anti-Trust Investigation followed by lengthy, expensive, Lawsuit** (hey, it brought down Micro$ucks stocks by more than 50%) hmm… Scupper needs a nasty attack…But what… I attack you Directly, Scupper (Nautical. An opening in the side of a ship at deck level to allow water to run off.) with a **Massive, Missive, Masacring Titanic Sinking Iceberg** Just try to allow water to run off when your at the bottom of the pacific! Mwahahahaha -Fox ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/250 "2001-01-12T20:51:21Z")
Since Scupper had my back in the last exchange, I suppose I should counter foxfyre’s **Titanic-sized iceberg** with **the acting performances in the 1998 feature film “Titanic”**. Tremble before me. ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/251 "2001-01-12T20:54:21Z")
And as my attack, I unleash the untrammeled forces of **Lynn Bodoni** upon you all. ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/252 "2001-01-12T21:07:18Z")
**Lynn** huh? Well, those powers are no match for **massive brown-outs and loss-of-service**. Directly, I defy you with [sub]snapping on gloves[/sub]: **a two-day-old dinglebear**. ---
**Author:** ![foxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@foxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foxfyre)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/253 "2001-01-12T21:13:12Z")
Ouch. **The Acting Performance of Titanic** I counter that with **Teaming Millions of pubescent girls quaking at the sight of Leo’s Naked Chest** And I atack with a **Truckload of Stolen Oscars** -Fox ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/254 "2001-01-12T21:20:47Z")
**Thinksnow** , your **dingle-berry** is hardly a match for [Water Wizz Water Park.](http://www.waterwizz.com/) For my attack, I turn a few cartwheels 'cross the floor, skipping **The Light Fandango** at terrifying speeds. ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/255 "2001-01-12T21:27:56Z")
foxfyre, your **Truckload of Stolen Oscars** shall be annoyed into oblivion by **The Continued Celebrity of Rosie O’Donnell**. ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/256 "2001-01-12T21:28:21Z")
\*\*magdalene \*\*skipping **The Light Fandango** is nice, but I sweep you into **a moderate Tango, swing into a Waltz and sway into a Foxtrot**. Defeated, you dance divinely. Tremble before the awesome power of **dried out contacts lens’ from staring at the monitor**. [sub]and BTW: it was an entire dinglebear, not just the berries[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![foxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@foxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foxfyre)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/257 "2001-01-12T21:29:10Z")
**Your Light Fandango** is not match for the utter coolness and fun of a **90 mph police escort sirens and all early sunday morning driving a huge black Cargo Van** lotsa fun, especially when you’re very caffeined up and sleep depraved. -Fox ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/258 "2001-01-12T21:32:39Z")
haHa! Thinksnow, you have grossly miscalculated - **dried-out contact lenses from staring at the monitor** can ALWAYS be avoided by **trendy Lisa Loeb-style eyeglasses**. As for “bear” versus “berry”, did you SEE the waterslides? For my counter-attack, I launch a plague of **tragically hip urban yuppie latte drinkers** upon your neighborhoods, with your parking spaces entirely overrun by **Volkswagon Jettas**. ---
**Author:** ![Scupper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Scupper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scupper)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/259 "2001-01-12T21:59:33Z")
I thwart your **tragically hip urban yuppie latte drinkers** with a simple **Dead Cel Phone Battery** and parry your dangerous **Volkswagon Jettas** with the dreaded **Check Engine Light**! (If you owned a Jetta, you’d know that there is no defense against this!) Now for my attack! Tremble and fear before me as I raze the arena with **Department Store Perfume Sniper Saleswoman!!!** ---
**Author:** ![cykrider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f19dbf/32.png) [@cykrider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cykrider)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2001, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513/260 "2001-01-12T22:05:39Z")
You forget Mags, the \*\*tragically hip urban yuppie latte drinkers[\b] are easily reduced to nothingness once their is a \*\*sale at Abercrombie and Fintch![\b] Which I was able to create under false-pretenses. Now you must face the wrath of \*\*172 hours of “The World’s Longests Fillabusters” hosted by Ben Stien![\b] [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-rochambo-fighter-arena/39513.md?page=14)