# Ultimate Simpsons Poll **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 4, 2003, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782 "2003-02-04T20:55:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Homer\_J](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c37758/32.png) [@Homer\_J](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homer_J)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2003, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/61 "2003-02-09T18:43:12Z")
Best one time character/location joke When they find the angel and riot against scientific buildings, someone throws a petrol bomb into the ‘robotic institue’ and a robot comes out on fire saying ‘why, why was i programmed to feel pain’ Such a funny line!, i laughed so hard when i first heard it Best audience gag: At the very end of Who shot Mr Burns 1 Dr Hibbert says; ‘this is a mystery, i can’t solve it, can you’ - and he points at the screen. Then cut to Chief Wiggam saying; ‘well i’ll give it a go, sure it is my job’! - Classic! and i’ll second Homer imanging his life if he robbed the qwicke mark daydream before realising hes driving home. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2003, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/62 "2003-02-09T18:45:57Z")
Best Otto line: "Oh, man, what am I smokin’? (looks at joint in his hand) “Oh, yeah, pot.” ---
**Author:** ![Homer\_J](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c37758/32.png) [@Homer\_J](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homer_J)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2003, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/63 "2003-02-09T18:56:23Z")
no - best otto line - auditioning for poochie ‘MAn a talking dog!, what were you guys smoking when you thought of this!’ ---
**Author:** ![HyacinthBucket](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hyacinthbucket/32/3063_2.png) [@HyacinthBucket](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HyacinthBucket)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2003, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/64 "2003-02-09T20:24:54Z")
**Best Historical Reference:** Homer finds an overdue library book and reads the story of the Fall of Troy. As King Priam (played by Ned Flanders) accepts the gift of the wooden horse, Priam says: “Now, throughout history, when people get wood, they’ll think of Trojans”. ---
**Author:** ![look\_ninjas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b2d939/32.png) [@look\_ninjas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/look_ninjas)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2003, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/65 "2003-02-09T23:23:15Z")
Best Otto line: “They call 'em fingers, but I’ve never seen 'em fing… wait… there they go.” Best Apu moment: The baby bottle vest. Definitely. Person I have most increased respect for after seeing them parody themselves on the Simpsons: Luke Perry. Longest entry for a question on the poll: see above. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2003, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/66 "2003-02-10T16:36:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Alias \* > \*\*I _think_ it was actually cloves and eggnog covered in a pie crust. I remember the first time I saw that, I laughed myself into a stomach ache. \*\* Nuh-un. It was cloves, Tom Collins mix and a frozen pie crust. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2003, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/67 "2003-02-10T16:44:53Z")
Comic book guy line: “Are you the creator of Hi and Lois? Because you are making me laugh.” ---
**Author:** ![Alias](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a88e4f/32.png) [@Alias](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alias)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2003, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/68 "2003-02-10T23:17:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bryan Ekers \* > \*\*Nuh-un. It was cloves, Tom Collins mix and a frozen pie crust. \*\* Thank you! I knew eggnog wasn’t right. Tom Collins mix is much, much worse. ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2003, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/69 "2003-02-10T23:27:45Z")
Best comic book guy line “Please do not bang your head on the display case, it contains a very rare Mary Worth, in which she has advised a friend to commit suicide. Thank you.” ---
**Author:** ![Katisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bcef8e/32.png) [@Katisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Katisha)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2003, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/70 "2003-02-10T23:35:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Raygun99 \* > \*\*Best vaguely homo-erotic suggestion, non-Smithers > “My prescription, another hot-beef injection!” > \*\* I vote for “Stupid sexy Flanders!” Although that’s not all that vague, is it? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Alias](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a88e4f/32.png) [@Alias](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alias)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/71 "2003-02-11T02:22:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Katisha \* > \*\*I vote for “Stupid sexy Flanders!” Although that’s not all that vague, is it? 😉 \*\* “Mr. Burns, I don’t go in for these back-door shenanigans.” ---
**Author:** ![gorillacus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/dfb087/32.png) [@gorillacus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gorillacus)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/72 "2003-02-11T04:30:23Z")
best comic guy line: 100 Tacos for a 100 dollars- ‘adequate sustenance for the Dr. Who marathon.’ best ralph wiggum: poison berries- ‘they taste like burning…’ best groundskeeper willie (tie): ‘there’s nae a beastie alive that can out run a greased scotsman.’ ‘i was wrestlin’ wolves when ye were still at your mothers teat’. best patty and selma: ‘ohhhh jub-jub’. best minivan: homer’s odyssey ---
**Author:** ![gorillacus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/dfb087/32.png) [@gorillacus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gorillacus)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/73 "2003-02-11T04:33:57Z")
ooh, forgot: best stoned homer: ‘Im not not licking toads’. Stuff like this gives my life meaning. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/74 "2003-02-11T05:17:34Z")
**Best Homer Drunk Moment** Marge reading a postcard Homer sent from the Duff brewery in Capitol City, "“Maybe it’s the beer talking Marge but you’ve got a butt that won’t quit. They got these big chewy pretzels here . . . (indecipherable). . . .five dollars, get outta here.” ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/75 "2003-02-11T14:08:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Max Carnage \* > \*\*James Earl Jones. Voice of “This…is CNN,” as well as Darth Vader and Mustafa. \*\* Wasn’t Henry Kissinger in there too? I love that episode. Bleeding Gums was killed off because Ron Taylor, who voiced him, was dying of cancer. He was a respected Broadway actor who won a Tony for “Ain’t Nothing But the Blues.” Now, back to the OP: Best Otto moment: At the mall, walking out of Stoner’s Pot Palace “Man, I can think of two things wrong with that sign.” Best Comic Book Guy line: While eating marshmellow peeps “Oh, if only real chicks went down this easy.” ---
**Author:** ![herwono](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/9f8e36/32.png) [@herwono](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/herwono)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/76 "2003-02-11T14:53:12Z")
Most touching moment: The one with the valentine’s day card: ‘I choo-choo-choose you’ I’ve never seen the episode with the pictures of Maggie at Homer’s workplace. Which episode is that? ---
**Author:** ![TJ555\_The\_Golfer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/41988e/32.png) [@TJ555\_The\_Golfer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TJ555_The_Golfer)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/77 "2003-02-11T16:27:28Z")
> [@](#): > > That waffle… I forgot about that. Wasn’t that wrapped around a stick of butter and doused in molasses or something equally sickening? I think you are thinking of two different waffles. The waffle mistaken for God was not the one wrapped around butter. That was Homer’s patented space age (out of this world) moon waffle, which was Mmmmm…fattening. If you want to make one here’s how: Homer’s Space Age(out of this world) Moon Waffles ingredients: 1 package of caramel squares 2 cups waffle batter 1 bottle liquid smoke 1 stick of butter instructions: place caramel in the waffle iron pour on waffle batter add liquid smoke to taste cook thoroughly take the stick of butter and wrap the moon waffle around it place it on a toothpick and serve makes 1 unfortunate serving This is from the SNPP, which has other receipts found here: [http://www.snpp.com/guides/foods.html](http://www.snpp.com/guides/foods.html) ---
**Author:** ![ravage2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d07c76/32.png) [@ravage2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ravage2)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/78 "2003-02-11T17:20:36Z")
Anyhoo, here’s another contender for **best song** when Lisa talks to Paul and Linda McCartney on top of Apu’s Kwik-e-mart. Paul asks if Lisa would like to hear a song Lisa - “Oh yes please!” Paul -“Take it away, Apu!” Apu starts singing some indian music. Not really best song but really funny nonethless. Best guest appearence scene The monorail ep when Leonard Nimoy is on the monorail “A solar eclipse: the cosmic ballet goes on” The guy sitting next to him yells out “Anybody want to switch seats?” ---
**Author:** ![Violin\_D\_Ingrate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/898d66/32.png) [@Violin\_D\_Ingrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Violin_D_Ingrate)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/79 "2003-02-11T18:04:50Z")
**Best Sign** (in Chinatown) Toys L Us ---
**Author:** ![DreadLead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/eb8c5e/32.png) [@DreadLead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DreadLead)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782/80 "2003-02-12T02:13:50Z")
Best Homer Quote: “Trying is the first step to failure” Best Scene: The Jerry Springer Show…with Kang Marge “I’m so BEEPING embarrassed” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ultimate-simpsons-poll/152782.md?page=5)