# Um, fuck you, you condescending fuck. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 9, 2004, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413 "2004-10-09T23:19:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2004, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/1 "2004-10-09T23:19:47Z")
Inspired to some degree by the “Huh?” thread. If one more motherfucker corrects someone by starting with “Um…”, there’s going to be carnage. \*\* CARNAGE, I SAY.\*\* Well, okay. No carnage. But why? Why in the blue fuck do you have to do it? Do you feel better about yourself by adding that smarmy little word at the beginning? Do you? [I know, I know – “Why, yes. Yes, I do.”] For those of you who haven’t seen this phenomenon [and I think most of you have], here’s an example: Poster 1: AFAIK, Joey Ramone only released one solo album. Poster 2: Um, no. There’s another collection of solo work slated to be released. **Um** , how about **shutting the fuck up** , you know-it-all cunt? I’m glad you feel so superior now that you got a chance to correct someone in a public forum. Please feel free to make with fucking the fuck off now. Take those two smarmy letters and shove them straight up your fucking ass. First person to reply with the word “Um” likes to fuck his sister in the ear. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2004, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/2 "2004-10-09T23:25:36Z")
I absolutely agree. It really chaps me when people do that. So someone knows more about something than someone else. So what? Big freakin’ deal! Make your correction if you must, be courteous about it, and don’t be an ass. ---
**Author:** ![Epimetheus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c4cdca/32.png) [@Epimetheus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Epimetheus)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2004, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/3 "2004-10-09T23:31:42Z")
[,mU](http://www.wordiq.com/definition/Mu_%28Japanese_word%29). ---
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2004, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/4 "2004-10-09T23:34:17Z")
> [@Epimetheus](#): > > [,mU](http://www.wordiq.com/definition/Mu_%28Japanese_word%29). Booooooooooooo. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2004, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/5 "2004-10-09T23:54:05Z")
Um, I think it’s a perfectly valid device for lending one’s reply a certain tone. FWIW, I feel exactly the same way about smileys as the OP does about “Um,” which at least has the advantage of being part of the written communication and not the lazy avoidance of more precise writing that the smiley represents. :wally ---
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/6 "2004-10-10T00:12:00Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > Um, I think it’s a perfectly valid device for lending one’s reply a certain tone. FWIW, I feel exactly the same way about smileys as the OP does about “Um,” which at least has the advantage of being part of the written communication and not the lazy avoidance of more precise writing that the smiley represents. > > :wally I don’t mind it so much in arguments – it’s when it crops up during an absolute friendly conversation/thread that it bugs me. And I got your smilies right here, bub. :rolleyes: 😃 :mad: :dubious: :wally Hee. But yeah… overuse of smilies warrants a smiting, as well. ---
**Author:** ![Podkayne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Podkayne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Podkayne)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/7 "2004-10-10T00:37:57Z")
Is “er” okay? Please tell me it’s okay to start a correction with “er.” Otherwise, how does one express the slight embarassment on feels in having to correct a fellow honorable Doper? ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/8 "2004-10-10T00:46:38Z")
> [@Podkayne](#): > > Is “er” okay? Please tell me it’s okay to start a correction with “er.” Otherwise, how does one express the slight embarassment on feels in having to correct a fellow honorable Doper? Ah, embarassment? Most of the Dopers I see post take positive delight and glee in issuing a correction. ---
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/9 "2004-10-10T00:46:50Z")
> [@Podkayne](#): > > Is “er” okay? Please tell me it’s okay to start a correction with “er.” Otherwise, how does one express the slight embarassment on feels in having to correct a fellow honorable Doper? Er is fine. It doesn’t show condescension, but the desire to fight ignorance and the desire to not come off as an asshole at the same time. So, er, you’re totally okay. ---
**Author:** ![Shrinking\_Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Shrinking\_Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shrinking_Violet)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/10 "2004-10-10T00:56:26Z")
What about “ohferchrissakes”? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Teelo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@Teelo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teelo)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/11 "2004-10-10T00:58:50Z")
I also agree, makes me feel like smashing skulls when arrogance can be sent through text. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/12 "2004-10-10T01:06:46Z")
> [@Shrinking Violet](#): > > What about “ohferchrissakes”? That’s still good. Also acceptable are “Hey dumbshit, …” and “Look, you fucking idiot, …” ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/13 "2004-10-10T01:08:07Z")
> [@chatelaine](#): > > Booooooooooooo. Agreed, although it _was_ peculiarly appropriate for someone named “Afterthought.” ---
**Author:** ![pokey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ebca7d/32.png) [@pokey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pokey)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/14 "2004-10-10T01:14:27Z")
That “um, I’m sorry but I believe I will have to correct you,” thing reminds me of High Fidelity. I think the character’s name was Dirk but it might have been Dick. Whenever someone on the internet does it I can’t help but imagine they are really little and timid and bald and that they carry a man purse to keep their nerd shit in. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/15 "2004-10-10T01:27:20Z")
> [@chatelaine](#): > > Er is fine. It doesn’t show condescension, but the desire to fight ignorance and the desire to not come off as an asshole at the same time. > > So, er, you’re totally okay. Um, don’t you think this is a bit arrogant and condescending, chatelaine? Not to mention arbitrary? First of all, I missed the memo that announce your appointment as Subtlety Czar. Second, I’ve always understood “er” to be the British way of spelling “uh” (think about it). No one–NO ONE I tell you–says “er” without first having seen it in print. I for one think eithe spelling conveys the same sentiment–_“I, uh, shouldn’t have to be pointing this out, because it’s pretty damn obvious and you shoulda looked it up before you started a pit thread on it.”_ ---
**Author:** ![RedFury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ec9cab/32.png) [@RedFury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedFury)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/16 "2004-10-10T01:41:16Z")
> [@chatelaine](#): > > First person to reply with the word “Um” likes to fuck his sister in the ear. Huh? ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/17 "2004-10-10T01:45:18Z")
Um, my sister says mind your own business, ya perv. _Actually, she shouted,“What?” first._ ---
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/18 "2004-10-10T02:12:21Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > Um, don’t you think this is a bit arrogant and condescending, chatelaine? Not to mention arbitrary? First of all, I missed the memo that announce your appointment as Subtlety Czar. Second, I’ve always understood “er” to be the British way of spelling “uh” (think about it). No one–NO ONE I tell you–says “er” without first having seen it in print. > > I for one think eithe spelling conveys the same sentiment–_“I, uh, shouldn’t have to be pointing this out, because it’s pretty damn obvious and you shoulda looked it up before you started a pit thread on it.”_ :rolleyes: Actually, you do have a point. I should have added the three words I thought were unspoken… **In my opinion** , I don’t find “er” to be as condescending as “um.” [Dictionary.com](http://Dictionary.com) says this: > [@](#): > > er Pronunciation Key (ûr) Used to express hesitation or uncertainty. So take that as you will. And if you didn’t get the memo, it was probably because you were too busy correcting someone and “Um”-ing all over the place! Have a :mad: for good measure. Also, have a 😃 . **Czarcasm** , you are using the right ear, I hope? Because everyone else has already used the left, or so I hear. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/19 "2004-10-10T02:22:00Z")
> [@chatelaine](#): > > Er is fine. It doesn’t show condescension, but the desire to fight ignorance and the desire to not come off as an asshole at the same time. > > So, er, you’re totally okay. Okay, someone explain to me how “um” shows condescension but “er” doesn’t. ---
**Author:** ![RedFury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ec9cab/32.png) [@RedFury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedFury)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2004, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413/20 "2004-10-10T02:24:26Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > _Actually, she shouted,“What?” first._ Bet she’ll never go back to swabs. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-fuck-you-you-condescending-fuck/268413.md?page=2)