# Um, yeah...the Scorpion King, um...yeah **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 22, 2002, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996 "2002-04-22T16:09:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2002, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/1 "2002-04-22T16:09:51Z")
So, I saw this movie over the weekend, and I must say, I enjoyed it, but I’m not sure if I liked it. I was expecting a bit more **Conan** , but instead ended up with **Xena** , which ins’t necessarily a bad thing. I mean, I like **Xena** , it’s just, people flying hundreds of feet from a single arrow hit…I wasn’t expecting that. Also, for those who have seen the movie and **The Mummy Returns** , is it just me, or did they completely rewrite his character? In **Mummy** he was supposed to be some terrifying warlord who laid waste to the lands in a quest to conquor the world, yet in this one, he essentially becomes “the people’s champion” (yeah, yeah, I know, bad joke, but they essentially spelled it out in once scene). Anyway, what did everyone else think? ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2002, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/2 "2002-04-22T16:55:18Z")
Well, here in the prequel it is all about Anakin’s life before he became Darth Vader - how he was one of the greatest Jedi and how it all led to his eventual turning to the Dark Side. We _are_ talking about StarWars, right? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![White\_Lightning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@White\_Lightning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Lightning)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2002, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/3 "2002-04-22T20:39:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by \*\*El Elvis Rojo \*_, paraphrased by me_ > Dude, Kelly Hu is _hot_!! I agree completely. I didn’t pay much attention to the rest of the movie. Don’t think I missed much. ---
**Author:** ![Lyllyan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b2d939/32.png) [@Lyllyan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lyllyan)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2002, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/4 "2002-04-22T21:09:42Z")
What a waste of $7.50 this was. I personally didn’t much care for it, however, the DH, young son and 2 teenage daughters really liked it. I got the drill all the way home. “You didn’t like it? Why didn’t you like it? You really didn’t like it?” Previews for “Undercover Brother” looked funny, but I think I will wait for the video. I got all excited when the preview for “Star Wars” came up, but then I realized it was the same trailer I had downloaded a couple of months ago. ---
**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2002, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/5 "2002-04-22T22:54:28Z")
I saw it the day after you guys did, **Elvis** , and I thought… well, that was fun. Today, though, I can barely remember a thing about it. I’m glad I saw it on the cheap. And yeah, are we sure that was the same Scorpion King we saw in The Mummy Returns? I mean… jeez… let’s have it tie in in some way other than having the same name and actor. ---
**Author:** ![Dragonblink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Dragonblink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragonblink)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2002, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/6 "2002-04-23T00:16:58Z")
Now, my opinion of the Scorpion King was that if you ignore all rules of physics, geography, and history, it’s a fun movie to watch. Lots of gratuitous violence. (not to mention the Rock, who is incredibly hot) I didn’t see that much disparity between the King in this movie and the King in Mummy Returns – this is just talling the “epic adventure” or whatever of how he came to power. By the time the opening scene of Mummy Returns happens, something has changed – either he’s trying to take over everything in the name of “peace, goodness, and fluffy puppies,” or power has corrupted him. Or something. In Mummy Returns, he hooks up a deal with Anubis for vengeance on his enemies for his lost army, an action which doesn’t seem terribly out of character, since he was quite revenge-oriented in Scorpion King. Incidentally, I could tell they tried to separate the character of the Scorpion King from the character of the Rock, but I saw a lot of classic wrestling moves going on in some of those fights. Backslams, post slams, the equivalent of the folding chair … I kept calling out for a Rock Bottom or a People’s Elbow. So essentially, the Scorpion King is a mindless, fun movie, kinda like a cross between the “Indiana Jones” feel of the Mummy movies, and the “plot as a way to get from this fight scene to the next” feel of martial arts movies like The One. I liked it, but then again Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is on my hot list, so I’d see any ol’ movie with him in it. ---
**Author:** ![Aguecheek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Aguecheek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aguecheek)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2002, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/7 "2002-04-23T13:58:26Z")
High adventure, low comedy. I love 'em. It’ll never be on my top 10 list, but it was a fun way to waste a couple of hours. ---
**Author:** ![annieclaus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b5a626/32.png) [@annieclaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/annieclaus)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2002, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/8 "2002-04-23T14:13:08Z")
Silly me! I actually thought this movie might impart some insight about how the Scorpion King came to be the half-man-half-scorpion badass guy from the last Mummy movie. When that didn’t happen, I guessed we would be headed off into Sequal Land. Maybe more than one sequel. Fortunately, I didn’t spend a dime on this piece of dreck; I went to a preview screening. The primary lure was The Rock, who melts my butter. The best thing about the movie, however, was the fact that it was short. No, I take that back: the white camel was a breakout star! The ethnic diversity was amusing! The costumes were . . . um. . . unusual. And how did Gomorrah fit into pre-Pyramid Egypt? And what was with those Vikings at the beginning? Or were they Goths? Visi- or Ostra-? Color me confused! What was I saying?. . . ---
**Author:** ![Legomancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/779978/32.png) [@Legomancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legomancer)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2002, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/9 "2002-04-23T15:12:12Z")
Woohoo! I get to play the Message Board drinking game! Drink when someone says: “I go to movies to be entertained, I don’t expect art.” “It was brainless fun.” “You have to learn how to suspend your disbelief.” “I never agree with the critics.” Chug when someone mentions _Citizen Kane_ or says, “I never read reviews because critics don’t know what they’re talking about.” ---
**Author:** ![Tranquilis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tranquilis/32/3639_2.png) [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2002, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/10 "2002-04-23T16:43:21Z")
Wait for it… Hey, they broke a number of cliches, at least… - The magic girl _doesn’t_ lose her powers after getting laid (Another vote for HOT lady!), - The lady _didn’t_ die saving her man from Certain Death (poison _or_ the arrow), - The explosion _didn’t_ bring the palace down in a heap of rubble, - The Sidekick _didn’t_ die heroically, - The final scene _didn’t_ predict ‘Happily Ever After’, - And weapons broke in use (not just the hero’s weapon, either). Entertaining, but not worth renting later. Oh, wait…! Kelly Hu is mostly naked through the whole film. I guess I’ll rent it after all. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/11 "2002-04-24T00:56:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by annieclaus \* > \*\*Silly me! I actually thought this movie might impart some insight about how the Scorpion King came to be the half-man-half-scorpion badass guy from the last Mummy movie. \*\* They covered that in The Mummy Returns. You know, lost army, revenge, pact with Anubis, etc, etc.? ---
**Author:** ![HubZilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ccd318/32.png) [@HubZilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HubZilla)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/um-yeah-the-scorpion-king-um-yeah/104996/12 "2002-04-24T01:38:48Z")
I was quite amazed at how much of Kelly Hu they were able to show and avoid the R-rating. And how inventively they tried to cover the naughty parts. Kelly Hu was easily worth the price of matinee admission. So, what else happened in the movie?