# Ummmm...Lesbians. **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [August 28, 2000, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991 "2000-08-28T03:15:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![relic\_11](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/50afbb/32.png) [@relic\_11](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/relic_11)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/1 "2000-08-28T03:15:39Z")
Okay, well. I have a friend, we will call her “Jane.” Jane is a lesbian. I, personaly, am very hetrosexual, and am confused by one thing. Jane thinks going down on a girl is “icky” (her own wording.) What I want to know is, well, what else IS there! 😕 Thanks ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/2 "2000-08-28T03:26:56Z")
Touching. ---
**Author:** ![evilbeth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/evilbeth/32/2268_2.png) [@evilbeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/evilbeth)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/3 "2000-08-28T03:53:08Z")
Well, _love_, for one thing. Then there is kissing, fondling, toys, mutual masturbation…the list goes on and on. ---
**Author:** ![lee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lee/32/7455_2.png) [@lee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lee)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/4 "2000-08-28T04:12:37Z")
Well, two womem can lay together so that each has one of the other’s leg between their own and embrace each other kissing and groping and rubbing against each other’s leg until they come. ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/5 "2000-08-28T05:05:18Z")
Most real lesbian sex that I know of seems more along the lines of what **lee** posted above. Rubbing with the legs is nice, as is manual stimulation. Going down is heavenly, but some couples **never** do it - snd there doesn’t have to be a need for it. Using vibrators is also common, although it is not like in porn - most of the time it’s clitoral or labial stimulation. Many don’t penetrate except with the fingers. And wild, strap-on sex with nipple clamps and whips probably happens with no more than one couple out of 50. My favorite way to make love to my SO is for her to sit between my legs, her back to me. I suckle and bite her neck while I manually stimulate her breasts and tummy with one hand, her clitoris and labia with the other. When she comes I bite her neck, pull her nipples, and rub her until she pushes me away. Hmmmm…think I have to go now… ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/6 "2000-08-28T06:22:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Anthracite \* > \*\*Hmmmm…think I have to go now… \*\* I think I have to go now too… ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/7 "2000-08-28T06:23:07Z")
That didn’t take long. Tahnks Anthracite. High five me! ---
**Author:** ![ricepad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b38774/32.png) [@ricepad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ricepad)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/8 "2000-08-28T06:26:03Z")
Hey, **relic\_11** …why doncha just ask **jane**? ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/9 "2000-08-28T11:59:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lance Turbo \* > \*\*That didn’t take long. > > Tahnks Anthracite. High five me! \*\* Eeeeeeeewwww! Not with **that** hand! ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/10 "2000-08-28T15:00:51Z")
Don’t mean to hijack the thread… but while we’re on the topic, why are lesbians such a turn-on for men? I mean from an evolutionary viewpoint (Mr. Winky and I know, from a hormonal viewpoint!). Seems to me that lusting after lesbians would be a drawback to fathering as many children as possible… ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/11 "2000-08-28T15:05:25Z")
Una, you’re doing this on purpose… Re: OP I agree it sure seems kinda odd, as nice and fulfilling as mutual masturbation and leg grinding is, it seems like a very limited sexual menu. I guess my response question would be, is she a mature _practicing_ lesbian, or just a girl who feels a attraction to other women which she hasn’t acted on in the carnal sense. If its the latter then this isn’t unusual at all, its not diffeent than a high school girl wrestling with her first dating experiences. She probably could find the prospect of oral sex on a guy icky, and very likely is overwhelmed by the concept of actually being penetrated by a guy. In that case I have little doubt she’ll outgrow her immaturity and come to love oral sex, just as most heterosexual couples do as they mature. If she is a chronologically mature lesbian, not only in sexual maturity, but also in the acceptance of her sexuality, and still feels this way I’d presume she had some type of unpleasant experience as a child. In that case her and her partner would probably consider therapy to determine if it is something more than a sexual idiosynchrosy. In short, it is odd. But I’m sure theres a long list of heterosexual women who recoil at the thought of sexual intercourse as well, leaving the same “huh?” response. ---
**Author:** ![Centerline](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/94ad74/32.png) [@Centerline](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Centerline)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/12 "2000-08-28T15:28:59Z")
“Seems to me that lusting after lesbians would be a drawback to fathering as many children as possible…” Huh? Still works, you know, from an evolutionary point of view. Now…where did I put my club in this cafe?.. ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/13 "2000-08-28T15:33:57Z")
Im baffled as to why any lesbian gave this question an answer when I don’t think it deserves one. ---
**Author:** ![Tymp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Tymp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tymp)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/14 "2000-08-28T15:51:35Z")
I’m sure everyone appreciates your judgement of the OP’s worthiness, **handy**. ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/15 "2000-08-28T16:16:54Z")
**handy** commenting on the worthiness of a post??!?!?! Smoke 'em if ya got 'em folks, thats the final sign of the apocalypse. ---
**Author:** ![lee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lee/32/7455_2.png) [@lee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lee)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/16 "2000-08-28T16:22:43Z")
Someone did not know something, so they asked a question in General Questions. How is that inappropriate? We are fighting ignorance. I thought the question was not phrased offensively at all. And sometimes people say things that you don’t quite understand, but don’t want to ask them directly about. I remember my mother making a remark about making panties for the dog for when she had her period. This raised a bunch of questions that I did not want to ask her over the phone. ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/17 "2000-08-28T17:15:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by handy \* > \*\*Im baffled as to why any lesbian gave this question an answer when I don’t think it deserves one. \*\* Here’s why - because of **lee’s** reasons, and because I fucking felt like it. Am I allowed to do that? You’ve made it clear through other comments and offhand remarks that you don’t care for me very much **handy**. Why, I do not know, but please keep these personal matters outside of GQ. ---
**Author:** ![relic\_11](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/50afbb/32.png) [@relic\_11](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/relic_11)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/18 "2000-08-28T18:08:52Z")
ricepad, she doesn’t know either! She’s new to this thang, she just came out recently and hasn’t found a nice girl. ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/19 "2000-08-28T18:19:01Z")
Una, I don’t know if he really dislikes you or not, but from past experience, he just has cranial-rectal inversion and his comments have no basis. Fact is, you can’t read into them. I’d save the energy of getting annoyed. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2000, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991/20 "2000-08-28T18:35:30Z")
The OP was in no way inappropriate. The thread title and OP could have been phrased in a way that had less potential for misunderstanding, but the poster is new. Let’s cut her some slack. Thanks for posting a great question, **relic\_11**. I, too, assumed that oral sex was almost always part of lesbian sex. Now I know better. Welcome to the SDMB. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ummmm-lesbians/30991.md?page=2)