# Unfilmable Books **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 9, 2012, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501 "2012-11-09T18:19:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/21 "2012-11-09T21:10:46Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > The Silmarillion would be a bigger one. I agree . ☹ Sadly, one of the most loved SF books “The Moon is harsh Mistress’ can NOT be done as a 2+ hour film. Maybe as a mini-series ala Rome or Deadwood. It’s been mentioned time after time here on lists of “books you’d like to see made into a movie” but I don’t think it can be done. In general, I’d say that only RAH’s YA novels could be made well into films. ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/22 "2012-11-09T21:49:45Z")
> [@Eutychus](#): > > Michael Schur … the co-creator of “Parks and Recreation.” He also plays Dwight’s cousin Mose on The Office. ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/23 "2012-11-09T21:53:02Z")
\*The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay \* by Michael Chabon would be a great HBO mini-series, but I don’t know how they could ever pull it off in a single movie. There’s just so much story to tell. ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/24 "2012-11-09T22:08:37Z")
The Silmarillion…gods, can you imagine trying? You’d lose the general public in the first, oh, 15 hours just trying to keep track of some of the names… 😛 (I think a lot of books, probably every book I’ve ever read COULD be adapted to the screen…but most would lose a lot, or everything in the translation) ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/25 "2012-11-09T22:12:08Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > The Silmarillion would be a bigger one. That’s the one I came in here to mention. Parts of it could be blown out into movies all their own, but the book, as a whole, is essentially a history book, covering literally thousands of years of events, with hundreds of characters, many of whom are very important for very short stretches. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/26 "2012-11-09T22:15:44Z")
> [@StusBlues](#): > > The Universal Baseball Association, Inc., J. Henry Waugh, Prop Interesting choice. It’s been 30 years since I read it (I suspect that most avid players of Strat-o-Matic or APBA Baseball read it at some point)…from what I recall, most of the issue would be that an awful lot of the book takes place in the protagonist’s thoughts. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/27 "2012-11-09T22:16:50Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > Interesting choice. It’s been 30 years since I read it (I suspect that most avid players of Strat-o-Matic or APBA Baseball read it at some point)…from what I recall, most of the issue would be that an awful lot of the book takes place in the protagonist’s thoughts. Exactly! ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/28 "2012-11-09T22:59:34Z")
[“A Civil Action”](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120633/) should’ve never been made into a movie. Very good book, but a lawyer researching corporate pollution does not make for gripping big screen action. It’s not really a book in the modern sense, but “Paradise Lost” would be very hard to do well on the big screen, I think. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Rieux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/29 "2012-11-09T23:14:19Z")
The Voynich Manuscript ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/30 "2012-11-09T23:23:43Z")
According to [this 2007 Cracked article](http://www.cracked.com/article_15072_the-10-most-awesome-movies-hollywood-ever-killed.html), Will Ferrell has been attached to _A Confederacy of Dunces_, but just can’t seem to get it to work. ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/31 "2012-11-09T23:27:47Z")
> [@HeyHomie](#): > > According to [this 2007 Cracked article](http://www.cracked.com/article_15072_the-10-most-awesome-movies-hollywood-ever-killed.html), Will Ferrell has been attached to _A Confederacy of Dunces_, but just can’t seem to get it to work. Chris Farley was attached before his death, I believe. I hear it’s moving forward again with Zach Galifianakis in the lead, as of this past May. ---
**Author:** ![kushiel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbce88/32.png) [@kushiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kushiel)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2012, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/32 "2012-11-10T00:41:26Z")
Okay, I’ll bite. I have no idea how they are going to do this 50 Shades of Grey movie. It’s unlikely a major movie studio would commit to an X rating for a movie this hyped - it needs to be an R rating to grapple in the housewives too embarrassed to go to an X rated movie, the women who haven’t read the book but want to see what all the hype is all about and the teens who couldn’t get in otherwise. So how do you stay faithful to the book and make it any good without the explicit sex? It’s a really generic romance novel without the kink aspect. So, uh, I guess it’s filmable, but in the same way many people say A Scanner Darkly and Dune were. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2012, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/33 "2012-11-10T00:53:14Z")
> [@XT](#): > > The Silmarillion…gods, can you imagine trying? You’d lose the general public in the first, oh, 15 hours just trying to keep track of some of the names… > > 😛 > > (I think a lot of books, probably every book I’ve ever read COULD be adapted to the screen…but most would lose a lot, or everything in the translation) Said this before, but parts of it could be filmable-the Beren and Luthien saga, for example. No way a single movie of the entire thing would work, of course, but we aren’t restricted to that option at all. ---
**Author:** ![Doughbag](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Doughbag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doughbag)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2012, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/34 "2012-11-10T01:05:35Z")
Peter F.Hamilton “Reality Dysfunction” and the sequels… unless they make like 3 movies per book… however, I would like to see it done ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2012, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/35 "2012-11-10T01:14:32Z")
I was a huge fan of the **Animorphs** series when I was a kid. Yes, CGI has advanced alot since that abomination of a TV series, but it’d still be pretty hard to film. Large portions of any given episode would consist of scenes of CGI animals with the actors doing voice over, one character is basically a telepathic hawk, another is a blue centuar with a scorpian tail (though I wonder if they could pull off having Ax’s human actor be a CGI composite of the other 4). None of the aliens are even remotely humaniod, and most of Visser Three’s morphs would look like something out of a bad acid trip. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Universe\_Lashes\_Out](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8797f3/32.png) [@The\_Universe\_Lashes\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Universe_Lashes_Out)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2012, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/36 "2012-11-10T01:38:49Z")
> [@Jas09](#): > > Someone has the film rights to _Inifinite Jest_, and I’m hard-pressed to figure out how that would be filmed in a reasonable or compelling way. We did get [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJpfK7l404I) pretty cool music video out of it. (Although I can’t believe they didn’t have the computer crash down over Otis P. Lord’s head at the end, and other various fanboy quibbles.) ---
**Author:** ![jordanr2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/838e76/32.png) [@jordanr2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jordanr2)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2012, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/37 "2012-11-10T01:41:10Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > _Naked Lun_– shit, no. I thought it was great, it’s just not an adaptation of the book. ---
**Author:** ![jordanr2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/838e76/32.png) [@jordanr2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jordanr2)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2012, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/38 "2012-11-10T01:47:45Z")
> [@casdave](#): > > I think James Joyce’ Ulysses would also be as unfilmable as it is unreadable. It’s [already been filmed](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0062414/), and it’s quite a good movie. ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2012, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/39 "2012-11-10T04:41:07Z")
_Replay_ could be tricky, what with the various characters who cover a 25-year age range (including one going from 14 to 39). Then there’s condensing all those loops into a reasonable running time. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2012, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501/40 "2012-11-10T06:56:56Z")
> [@The\_Universe\_Lashes\_Out](#): > > We did get [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJpfK7l404I) pretty cool music video out of it. (Although I can’t believe they didn’t have the computer crash down over Otis P. Lord’s head at the end, and other various fanboy quibbles.) That is fucking awesome! Although, I must admit, I always pictured Ann Kittenplan as much more of a steroid freak. > [@](#): > > There’s a noise like the historical sum of all cafeteria accidents everywhere. I believe it was actually the monitor that came down on Lord’s head. Wallace did not foresee flat panel displays. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfilmable-books/640501.md?page=3)