# Unfortunate Company Names **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 11, 2009, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720 "2009-09-11T19:36:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2009, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/61 "2009-09-12T17:37:41Z")
In these threads, I always contribute the Northeastern US brand: B&M Baked Beans ---
**Author:** ![Claptree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@Claptree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claptree)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2009, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/62 "2009-09-12T17:50:48Z")
I hadn’t thought about it for a while, and checking now I see they’ve changed their name. I submit [IBI Group](http://www.ibigroup.com/), formerly Cumming-Cockburn with the website www dot cumming-cockburn dot com. Unsurprisingly, that URL is now a porn site. ---
**Author:** ![enomaj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/59ef9b/32.png) [@enomaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enomaj)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2009, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/63 "2009-09-12T18:08:11Z")
Siemens I’m gonna throw in Beaver College(Arcadia University) . I remember them trying to stick it out before succumbing to a name change. ETA: Beaver started admitting men 1972. Notable alumnus: Mike Hunt. ---
**Author:** ![TWDuke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@TWDuke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TWDuke)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2009, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/64 "2009-09-12T18:20:53Z")
… which reminds me of the institution formerly known as “[Dummer Charity School](http://www.thegovernorsacademy.org/home/content.asp?section=about%20us).” (Spelled “Dumm’r” on the Web page, but that’s just dumb.) ---
**Author:** ![supergoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@supergoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supergoose)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2009, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/65 "2009-09-12T21:12:07Z")
Not risque but I love it anyway: Bray and Scarff (kitchen appliances). ---
**Author:** ![Angel\_of\_Doubt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7cd45c/32.png) [@Angel\_of\_Doubt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angel_of_Doubt)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2009, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/66 "2009-09-12T22:34:03Z")
> [@Leiko](#): > > **Angel of Doubt** , I think there’s also the “strap-on” rhyme to consider. Oooooh. I would never have thought of that, it seems kind of a, er, stretch. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2009, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/67 "2009-09-13T01:48:27Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > “Fluke” was also the name of a trucking company whose trucks I recall seeing many times on the highway. Their slogan? “If it gets there on time, it’s a Fluke!” There’s a big trucking company on the East Coast called **G** uaranteed **O** vernight **D** elivery. Acronym in BIG letters, with the spelled-out name in much smaller letters below. > [@StaudtCJ](#): > > Around here we have a company called Sofa King. And the commercials say the prices are Sofa King Low. There was a Doper named **Sofa King** , but he’s not been around for years. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2009, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/68 "2009-09-13T02:00:34Z")
nevermind ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2009, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/69 "2009-09-13T03:09:54Z")
There’s a British diversified services company that, among other things, leases and maintains potted plants in office buildings. Their name is Rentokil - “rent-to-kill.” :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![pudytat72](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@pudytat72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pudytat72)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2009, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/70 "2009-09-13T14:11:40Z")
Twinkie’s 20" Twankies “We Simply Want Your Business & We Do It Right The First Time” There were steel shutters over all the windows so we never could figure out what they were selling. (wheel rims?) ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2009, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/71 "2009-09-13T15:08:14Z")
Bob’s Grill in Nags Head, N.C. has the mock-pugnacious motto emblazoned over its building, “Eat and get the hell out!” ---
**Author:** ![HookerChemical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/278dde/32.png) [@HookerChemical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HookerChemical)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2009, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/72 "2009-09-14T20:13:55Z")
They’re defunct now, but I’ve always thought Hooker Chemical was an unfortunate name for a company. Also, I find it a somewhat humorous Internet handle. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2009, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/73 "2009-09-14T20:15:36Z")
> [@friedo](#): > > I always thought Custer Battles was a pretty horrible name for a military contractor. “Sure, we’ll sell you some battles! Just like Custer’s!” > > Not surprising that they seem to be out of business. I’ve noticed that this is/(was?) an ironic name, too. But the way you put it is hilarious. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2009, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/74 "2009-09-14T20:37:30Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Snap-on Tools has taken a lot of ribbing over the decades for its name. I swear the following is true. In 1971/1972 ish Snap-On came out with an electronic oscilloscope / engine analyzer. Engine oscilloscope and analyzer So what to call it? :::: Drum roll::: The Snap-On Anal-O-Scope (a-Nal - O - scope) It analyzes, it’s an oscilloscope. The name has it all. Anyway our SO rep came in one day and his uniform shirt had the patch for the new test on the shoulder. A guy I worked with took one look at the patch and said: ( You know where this is going, right?) “What’s an anal scope?” The SO guy came right back with: “It’s a Greek tune up.” ---
**Author:** ![Nancarrow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c37758/32.png) [@Nancarrow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nancarrow)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2009, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/75 "2009-09-14T20:47:02Z")
> **[Network Support Lakeland FL || Boring Business Systems](https://boring.com/)** > > Complete Network Support & Network Management Services in Lakeland FL . Printers, Copiers & Scanners from Lakeland's most reliable Network Support company. Name of the founder, apparently. Family owned business. Office supplies, naturally. Unfortunately they no longer seem to have the page with a picture of the current owner. Lovely guy I’m sure, but his name, and company name, combined with the expression he was wearing… priceless. (I’m from London, never been anywhere near central Florida. Found the company at work one day when I decided to type ‘boring’ into google) ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2009, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/76 "2009-09-14T20:49:34Z")
> [@Love\_Rhombus](#): > > We have a sporting-goods store here in PA called Dick’s. What’s the apostrophe in the logo, you ask? A couple of balls (soccer and basketball). What’s even better is that there’s a mega-strip-mall kind of place outside of Philadelphia with a Dick’s Sporting Goods right near a Giant supermarket. So one of the signs pointing people to various locations reads: GIANT DICK’S ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2009, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/77 "2009-09-14T20:58:43Z")
Naval Sea Systems Command, the largest of the U.S. Navy’s five system commands, is referred to as “NAVSEA”, which looks an awful lot like what you might feel at sea. There’s a realtor in the Philadelphia area called “Prudential Fox & Roach”. The Fox part is OK, but Roach… maybe I’ll just take the \*virtual \*tour, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Cheapo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8e7dd6/32.png) [@El\_Cheapo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Cheapo)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2009, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/78 "2009-09-14T20:58:56Z")
My personal favorite is… [Harness, Dickey & Pierce](http://www.hdp.com) Sounds more like a place that does below-the-equator body jewelry. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/79 "2009-09-18T13:16:07Z")
> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#): > > There’s a British diversified services company that, among other things, leases and maintains potted plants in office buildings. Their name is Rentokil - “rent-to-kill.” :rolleyes: They must be active in Canada as well, because I’ve occasionally seen their trucks around here… but I thought they were exterminators. In which case, the name makes perfect sense. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/80 "2009-09-18T13:45:29Z")
Others have already mentioned **Fluke** and **Rentokil** (which sounds like an alternative to “Rent to Own”), which would have mentioned. A couple of less popular ones: **Jefferson Smurfit** “When in the course of Little Blue People events, it becomes necessary for one Tiny People to…” They’ve changed their name recently to **Smurfit-Stone** , which isn’t an obvious improvement. I pass this place all the time on Route 128 north of Boston. **Gorny-Gorny Mortuaries** in Elizabeth New Jersey. They have a huge yellow sign you can’t miss on the Jersey Turnpike, with a big clock stuck between the two _Gorny_s. Even if your family name is Gorny, why double it? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720.md?page=5)