# Unfortunate Company Names **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 11, 2009, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720 "2009-09-11T19:36:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/81 "2009-09-18T16:47:52Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > There’s a big trucking company on the East Coast called **G** uaranteed **O** vernight **D** elivery. Acronym in BIG letters, with the spelled-out name in much smaller letters below. The best part is their phone number, also prominently displayed on their trucks: 1-800-DIAL-GOD. See, it’s as easy as that. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/82 "2009-09-18T17:33:19Z")
Speaking of delivery, I love the **YELLOW** truck company. Whose logo is in that shade of **YELLOW…wait, orange!** ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/83 "2009-09-18T18:17:02Z")
> [@](#): > > There’s a big trucking company on the East Coast called Guaranteed Overnight Delivery. Acronym in BIG letters, with the spelled-out name in much smaller letters below. Jack Chalker wrote a series of novels about a fictional company called **G.O.D.** and swears he didn’t know an actual such firm existed… …until one truck with G.O.D. on it pulled up next to him at a stop light one day. Freaked him out. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/84 "2009-09-18T18:22:52Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > **Jefferson Smurfit** “When in the course of Little Blue People events, it becomes necessary for one Tiny People to…” They’ve changed their name recently to **Smurfit-Stone** , which isn’t an obvious improvement. I pass this place all the time on Route 128 north of Boston. I see trucks with the name Smurfit-MBI on the roads here. Related company? > [@CalMeacham](#): > > **Gorny-Gorny Mortuaries** in Elizabeth New Jersey. They have a huge yellow sign you can’t miss on the Jersey Turnpike, with a big clock stuck between the two _Gorny_s. Even if your family name is Gorny, why double it? Is that any worse than Mahindra & Mahindra? > [@Ludovic](#): > > Speaking of delivery, I love the **YELLOW** truck company. Whose logo is in that shade of **YELLOW…wait, orange!** I always wondered about that as well. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/85 "2009-09-18T18:33:20Z")
That’s one of those situations where I wondered for awhile, until I realized that it’s probably a FAQ that is on the company’s website. Which indeed it is: apparently deep orange sticks out better at night than yellow. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/86 "2009-09-18T18:37:25Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > It’s ironic that one would think that would be a huge Google hit from porn websites and V1ag4@ spammers, but most of the hits for “Mammoth Erections” are about the actual construction company name. I suspect a lot of people are linking to their website for giggles, and if I understand Google’s methodology right, that helps their ranking. There’s a business in the Chicago suburbs called [Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services](http://www.adolfservices.com/). Yes, it has the “and Cremation Services” right on their sign, and I hate to say it always brings up bad associations with the “Adolf” part. They have a bad location, too - funeral home right next to an old age home. ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/87 "2009-09-18T18:42:54Z")
We have a **Leavitt Funeral Home**. That always slays me. Although, personally, I think I’m going to have my services at the House of Browns. ---
**Author:** ![Taciturn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cab0a1/32.png) [@Taciturn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taciturn)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/88 "2009-09-18T19:09:40Z")
There’s a chain of West Indian restaurants in the GTA (Greater Toronto Area) called Willy’s Jerk. They have a franchise not far from where I work. At some point, a competitor opened up called “Juicy Jerk’s”… ---
**Author:** ![bartleby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bartleby/32/10491_2.png) [@bartleby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bartleby)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/89 "2009-09-18T19:36:19Z")
once again… When I lived in NYC, there was a “Soon Fat” Chinese take-out place. There used to be an OB-GYN in western MA named Dr. Finger. who can forget [Big Bone Lick](http://www.big-bone-lick.com/) state park. It’s even on Beaver Rd. And yes, there is indeed a Beaver Lick baptist church down the street. ---
**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/90 "2009-09-18T19:38:27Z")
We have a local attorney firm by the name of Grimm & Grimm…we fondly referred to them as The Brothers Grimm. What were the designers at “http:/ /www.speedofart.com/” thinking? ETA: And I also forgot about ANY business in French Lick, Indiana… ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/91 "2009-09-18T19:38:50Z")
As long as we’re talking state parks, how about the [Bong Recreation Area](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bong_Recreation_Area)? ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/92 "2009-09-18T19:43:35Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > I always thought the employment-statistics firm Challenger Gray & Christmas just sounded goofy. They are an outplacement firm that large companies bring in to help soon-to-be-axed employees transition from employment/relative security to unemployment/job searching/insecurity. I always thought it sounded ironic because if you see them around your workplace late in the year, you would probably be wise to plan only modest Christmas festivities and save your money. There’s the Clabber Girl brand of baking soda. There’s nothing particularly bad about the name, but I used to be perplexed by their URL, which has since been changed. It was www. [clabbergirl2.com](http://clabbergirl2.com). That’s right, “clabbergirl2”. Because with all the people clamoring to use the URL “ClabberGirl”, they were obviously asleep at the switch when they decided to put up a Web site. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/93 "2009-09-18T22:10:09Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > [Rentokil] must be active in Canada as well, because I’ve occasionally seen their trucks around [Toronto]. We have 'em on this coast, too. Actually, I just made an appointment with one of their sales agents for a quote next week. She closed with the question, “How did you hear about us?” I told her that they had a contract with another company I worked for about fifteen years ago, and opted not to add that I was reminded of them by an internet messageboard thread about unfortunate company names. ---
**Author:** ![Martini\_Enfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/martini_enfield/32/11123_2.png) [@Martini\_Enfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martini_Enfield)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/94 "2009-09-19T00:55:43Z")
I think most _Red Dwarf_ fans would agree that Italian appliance manufacturer Smeg has an unfortunate name… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![pabstist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e99b99/32.png) [@pabstist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pabstist)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/95 "2009-09-19T01:19:47Z")
I loved seeing these trucks as a kid back in the 80’s. Seriously, what kid wouldn’t love seeing a truck that said “humpin to please” in HUGE letters?! [http://www.hankstruckpictures.com/pix/trucks/kevin\_mcclintic/2003/aug26/hump66.jpg](http://www.hankstruckpictures.com/pix/trucks/kevin_mcclintic/2003/aug26/hump66.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![cwthree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@cwthree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cwthree)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/96 "2009-09-19T01:21:16Z")
There used to be a video rental place in Chicago called **Tapeworm**. I suppose someone was thinking “books:bookworm::tapes:…” Their logo was an anthropomorphic caterpillar. I once came across some inexpensive spatulas sold under the brand name **Rubber Queen**. When I think of the phrase “rubber queen,” kitchen implements is _not_ the first thing, or even the second thing, that comes to mind. ---
**Author:** ![cwthree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@cwthree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cwthree)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/97 "2009-09-19T01:24:24Z")
> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#): > > There’s a British diversified services company that, among other things, leases and maintains potted plants in office buildings. Their name is Rentokil - “rent-to-kill.” :rolleyes: You beat me to this one! There’s a Rentokil plant service in Chicago as well. I can’t look at the name without thinking, “Rentokil - when rent-to-own isn’t enough.” ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/98 "2009-09-19T04:59:01Z")
Granted this isn’t a corporate name, but it seems to fit the theme well. Living at a certain apartment house in my neighborhood probably is a good deal more pleasant than you would think, judging by the name of the place. [But then it would have to be](http://s494.photobucket.com/albums/rr308/DeathB4D_Calf/?action=view¤t=ChezCrappy.jpg). ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/99 "2009-09-19T06:43:58Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > We have a **Leavitt Funeral Home**. Of course knowing it’s pronounced “Levitt” blunts the gag a little. In the Buffalo area, there are several mortuaries called [Amigone](http://www.amigone.com/). Put a ? after it if you have to. ---
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720/100 "2009-09-19T07:49:21Z")
It must suck trying to get deliveries to the Crapi Apartments. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-company-names/509720.md?page=6)