# Unfortunate names of real people **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 8, 2011, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705 "2011-04-08T19:47:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/142 "2011-05-24T16:45:41Z")
> [@toofs](#): > > E-3 in the Navy is Seaman. I’ve met Seaman Seeman, Seaman Dick, Seaman Stanko, Seaman Hunter, and the best of all, Seaman Coffee. But not Seaman Staines? ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/143 "2011-05-24T17:48:06Z")
My parents were in Egypt when they met Peter Stiff. His wife was Gladys Stiff. ---
**Author:** ![ghostman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a3d4f5/32.png) [@ghostman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ghostman)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/144 "2011-05-24T19:57:53Z")
We were at the Detroit Tigers game last night. Pitchers: Furbush, Benoit (pronounced Ben wah) 2B: Sizemore LF: Dirks we were chuckling the entire time. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/145 "2011-05-24T20:30:18Z")
Acnepinescum (Acne-pine-scum pronounced Ac-ne-pi-ne-scum) Yesno (Yes-No pronounced Yez-no) ---
**Author:** ![Doctor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Doctor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/146 "2011-05-24T20:46:20Z")
Dick Marks. Dusty Rhoades. Knew a guy with the first name Wings. Jr. High gym teacher Mr. Head. Always wondered if his first name was Richard. ---
**Author:** ![Bijou\_Drains](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bijou_drains/32/2814_2.png) [@Bijou\_Drains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bijou_Drains)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/147 "2011-05-24T20:57:47Z")
Found out today about a woman who has the last name of Hiscock. ---
**Author:** ![Tess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@Tess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tess)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/148 "2011-05-25T00:33:34Z")
I used to work with a kid named Cinjin. Not sure if his parents simply heard the name St. John and didn’t bother to learn the proper spelling, or if they knew and decided to improve on it. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Girlfriend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.girlfriend/32/193_2.png) [@Dr.Girlfriend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Girlfriend)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/149 "2011-05-25T00:50:09Z")
Had a friend in high school who had the last name Yache. Pronounced “yah-key”. Her sister’s name was Tara… I have a customer at work whose last name is Ring. She married a guy named Cox and hyphenated her name. But for some reason she did it backward… Cox-Ring instead of Ring-Cox. Neither of them is great, but she never remembers her account number and just tells the tellers to “Pull up the Cox-Ring account.” It’s a credit to the tellers that none of them have busted out laughing… ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/150 "2011-05-25T01:44:00Z")
I just processed a credit card sale at work for a guy named Sebastian Sebastian. Saw his ID, so he’s legit. I think I’d kill my parents… Joe ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/151 "2011-05-25T01:59:40Z")
Frankenstein occurs often enough to be on the [top 100,000 surnames](http://www.census.gov/genealogy/names/dist.all.last). I’ve met a couple of people with the name over the years. I threatened employees who worked at a hotel with me with corporal punishment “if you even think about the possibility of perhaps considering a joke about the name” because can you even imagine how many jokes they’ve heard by the time they’re 5 even? I had a friend in college who I’ll call Victor Victor (his name was close but not that- same first and surname). His parents named him Victor and then split up when he was a baby, and his stepfather whose last name was Victor adopted him. ---
**Author:** ![GameHat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ed655f/32.png) [@GameHat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GameHat)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/152 "2011-05-25T02:21:05Z")
I’m not even joking, this is first-hand experience. I used to work with a guy named Michael Hunt. To his credit, he made damn sure to be called “Michael”. Catch him in the hall and say, “hey, morning Mike!” and he’d reply “Good morning to you! But please, call me **Michael**.” Can’t blame him 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cryptic\_C62](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Cryptic\_C62](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cryptic_C62)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/153 "2011-05-25T02:31:47Z")
My faves: My brother claims that while going through a database at his job, he found the name “Queenettrius Kimble”. My boss claims to have had a student named “Rosa Bosa”. As a young lad, I was doing some filing work at my mom’s office, and I found a folder with the name “Butts, Harry” I met an attendant at Walt Disney World whose full name was George Moorehead IV. He said that when it appeared on official documents, it was written “Moorehead IV George” (more head for George!) I know a female human whose last name is spelled “Vaitruardrok” but is pronounced like “Why too it low”. What the fuck? ---
**Author:** ![toofs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@toofs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/toofs)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/154 "2011-05-25T02:41:31Z")
> [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](#): > > But not Seaman Staines? Rumor has it there have been a few Seaman Staines on Navy ships. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/155 "2011-05-25T12:36:39Z")
> [@toofs](#): > > Rumor has it there have been a few Seaman Staines on Navy ships. Usually on the poop deck. ---
**Author:** ![Koldanar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@Koldanar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koldanar)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/156 "2011-05-25T12:37:43Z")
My father had a friend, Richie LaBarbara. He’s not the odd name; he married a Barbara. ---
**Author:** ![Shakester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shakester/32/437_2.png) [@Shakester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shakester)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/157 "2011-05-25T15:13:00Z")
When I worked in retail, I saw a few odd names on credit cards. The one I remember best was a sweet-looking young lady who had a rather unfortunate hyphenated surname: Allman-Hoare. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/158 "2011-05-25T15:57:12Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > I just processed a credit card sale at work for a guy named Sebastian Sebastian. Saw his ID, so he’s legit. I think I’d kill my parents… > > Joe Ah yes, the double name. There was a girl in my elementary school named Martina Martinez. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/159 "2011-05-25T15:58:47Z")
I had a teacher in HS with the unfortunate name of Roland Rotundo. He was sort of chubby. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![silvermist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@silvermist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silvermist)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/160 "2011-05-25T19:35:27Z")
> [@Uncle\_Jocko](#): > > I went to high school with a girl named Karla Hidy (HI-dee). Not so unfortunate, you say? > > Her older sister’s first name was Heidi. > > I always wondered what her parents were thinking. If she marries a Chinese man it may be Heidi Hidy Ho! ---
**Author:** ![Avarie537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/48db29/32.png) [@Avarie537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avarie537)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2011, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705/161 "2011-05-25T22:50:50Z")
I work at a vet clinic in a small town. One of our elderly clients is Ms. Ora Lee XXX. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unfortunate-names-of-real-people/577705.md?page=9)