# Unhelpful responses **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 16, 2018, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646 "2018-11-16T21:30:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/21 "2018-11-19T15:33:46Z")
> [@Flyer](#): > > You’re evidently not a Christian. > > Corrie Ten Boom was a Christian. Since she wasn’t married, it’s axiomatic that she didn’t have children. > > I’ve occasionally answered that question in the exact same way. I know a number of Christians who are unmarried mothers. Even if you aren’t being questioned by Nazis, how hard is it to answer the question asked? If you respond “I’m not married”, I can assume you are a person (Christian or otherwise) who doesn’t believe in having children out of wedlock, or perhaps you didn’t hear me or that you misunderstood what I asked. ---
**Author:** ![gdave](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gdave/32/3683_2.png) [@gdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gdave)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/22 "2018-11-19T15:43:12Z")
> [@freckafree](#): > > There’s also the category of unhelpful responses to Amazon product questions. A person will ask about a product, “Do you know if this will do X?” And someone will respond, “I don’t know. I’ve never tried to do X with it.” How in the world is that helpful to the person who asked the question? This is pretty much entirely Amazon’s fault. If you have purchased a product in the past, Amazon will occasionally email a publicly posted question about it directly to you and ask if you can help answer it. The reply is then posted publicly. I’ve gotten such questions, and it was not at all clear in Amazon’s email that the question being asked was a public, general request for answers, not specifically and directly being asked of me in particular, and it was not at all clear that my answer would be publicly posted as a general, public response, rather than as a direct, private reply to the person asking the question. ---
**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/23 "2018-11-19T15:49:53Z")
> [@Flyer](#): > > You’re evidently not a Christian. > > Corrie Ten Boom was a Christian. Since she wasn’t married, it’s axiomatic that she didn’t have children. > > I’ve occasionally answered that question in the exact same way. Err… correction. Christians absolutely can and occasionally do have children out of wedlock. However, you’re correct that it’s axiomatic that many of them are so judgmental of it that they need to remind others via deliberately unhelpful answers. I mean, really. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/24 "2018-11-19T15:57:57Z")
Asking a question on StackOverflow (a programming q/a forum): Q: Can I use software library ‘doohickey’ to implement partially sharded thingamabobs? A: Why do you need partially sharded thingamabobs? JFC I need it because I need it. I’m working with constraints not under my control, the backstory is long and boring, this approach is my workaround. Answer the question or don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/25 "2018-11-19T17:37:44Z")
In the days before GPS, if you stop and ask for directions in the Appalachians, the most common response is “Oh, you can’t get there from here.” ---
**Author:** ![RaftPeople](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6f9a4e/32.png) [@RaftPeople](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RaftPeople)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/26 "2018-11-19T17:45:11Z")
One of our kids forgot to check oil in car and ruined the engine. The rest of the car was nice so there was some value there for the right person. The first statement of the ad was: “\*\* CAR DOES NOT RUN, NEEDS NEW ENGINE \*\*” Lots of people’s first questions was “how does it run?” We had a couple people show up to look at it, and ask if they could test drive it. ---
**Author:** ![Rocketeer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocketeer/32/4437_2.png) [@Rocketeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rocketeer)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/27 "2018-11-19T18:00:50Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#): > > In the days before GPS, if you stop and ask for directions in the Appalachians, the most common response is “Oh, you can’t get there from here.” My wife and I got a similar response when trying to get to Exeter Cathedral on our honeymoon. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/28 "2018-11-19T18:40:26Z")
> [@Flyer](#): > > You’re evidently not a Christian. > > Corrie Ten Boom was a Christian. Since she wasn’t married, it’s axiomatic that she didn’t have children. > > I’ve occasionally answered that question in the exact same way. I am certainly NOT standing up for the Nazi here, but she could have married, had children w/ her husband and then been widowed. Now she’s not married but has kids. ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/29 "2018-11-19T18:46:09Z")
> [@DummyGladHands](#): > > Me: do you have the scissors (or whatever) ? > > Him: what for? That kind of response to a Yes/No question has to be one of the most aggravating things; right up there w/ answering No to something and being asked if you’re sure. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/30 "2018-11-19T21:29:17Z")
> [@Stuntman\_Mike](#): > > From just a couple months ago… > > My email in response to a car for sale ad: > > “Hello, I’m interested in the Cadillac for sale. Does it have a sunroof? I cannot see in the pics. Thanks very much.” > > Response from seller: > “its still available nice car low miles loaded up runs great” > … This is just the 1980’s hard-sell rule: “Never say ‘no’ to the customer.” It’s an incredible time-waster for all involved, but still sales canon in a lot of places. It’s also where the response “I’ll take that as a ‘no’.” comes from. > [@Flyer](#): > > You’re evidently not a Christian. > > Corrie Ten Boom was a Christian. Since she wasn’t married, it’s axiomatic that she didn’t have children. > > I’ve occasionally answered that question in the exact same way. You may have occasionally responded in that manner, but in doing so you have not answered the question. “I’m a Christian who doesn’t believe in pre-marital sex, have never broken that personal rule, have never donated sperm, and am as yet unmarried” MIGHT be enough to actually answer the question. But I’m sure some Doper will find an exception I’ve missed. I assure you that there are quite a few Christians who do not believe God is a member of the cult of virginity. ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/31 "2018-11-19T21:47:55Z")
Reminds me of the old joke Q: How do you know you are talking to an engineer? A: The answer to every question is “It depends” ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/32 "2018-11-19T21:58:39Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > But I’m sure some Doper will find an exception I’ve missed. Like “but I’ve taken in my sister’s children after they were orphaned.” Or “I conceived when I was raped, and choose to bear the child and parent her.” Or the aforementioned widow, who would not currently be married, but might have children." So no, its not at all axiomatic that she didn’t have children - even assuming that Christian means no premarital sex - which of course is a completely laughable idea as the number of seven month babies born to good Christian couples can attest to. ---
**Author:** ![ftg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ftg/32/2801_2.png) [@ftg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ftg)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/33 "2018-11-20T13:09:04Z")
Another vote for computer forums: Q: “How do you do X in Java?” A1: “You really should switch to PHP.” A2: “Here’s how to do Y.” A3: “No one ever needs to do X.” And on and on. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/34 "2018-11-20T13:29:56Z")
> [@Folacin](#): > > I know a number of Christians who are unmarried mothers. Sure, _nowadays_. Generations ago, though, there was an enormous stigma against being an unwed mother. Answering “I’m not even married” to “Do you have children?” would have been about as natural as answering “I never even went to college” to “Did you go to grad school?” might be today. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/35 "2018-11-20T13:33:13Z")
> [@Nawth\_Chucka](#): > > That kind of response to a Yes/No question has to be one of the most aggravating things; right up there w/ answering No to something and being asked if you’re sure. Out of left field I know, but I started watching Deadwood on Amazon Prime and people on the show do this ALL THE TIME! “Did you get that blood out of the floor?” “I’ve been scrubbing all night!” “That’s not what I f_cking asked you, you f_ucking c\*cksucker!” (Removed some swear words for clarity) ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/36 "2018-11-20T13:38:38Z")
I was at the kitchen table having cereal and poring (pouring? 🆒) over the 2% milk container. I asked my father’s wife “what’s the difference between Skim Milk and 2% Milk?” She answered “Skim milk is skim milk, and 2% milk is 2% milk”. Me 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/37 "2018-11-20T15:26:41Z")
Last week I emailed someone asking for another person’s date of birth. She responded, “Which hotel is she staying at?” 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/38 "2018-11-20T15:36:00Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > Sure, _nowadays_. Generations ago, though, there was an enormous stigma against being an unwed mother. > > Answering “I’m not even married” to “Do you have children?” would have been about as natural as answering “I never even went to college” to “Did you go to grad school?” might be today. This sort of thing shows an amazing lack of knowledge about History. Was their stigma…sure. But there were also ways to get around that stigma. A young widow moves into town to live with her cousins - that was a popular one. Heck, nuns were known to have children. All quietly hushed up, but we have historical records of such things from pretty much every historical period. It is certainly not axiomatic that unmarried Christian = no children. (I don’t think its that much of an unhelpful answer - it isn’t a direct answer, but you pretty much get the answer out of it - but it certainly isn’t the case that unmarried = no children, or even unmarried Christian = no children - and that’s the sort of false equivalence that doesn’t do society any good in understanding either its present or its past. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/39 "2018-11-20T15:41:55Z")
It was not uncommon for an unmarried woman to leave home for six months to care for a sick relative, or some such nonsense. And then for her parents to suddenly “adopt” a child. ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646/40 "2018-11-20T15:43:56Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > A recent interview I had went like this: > > Interviewer: What medications are you on? > Me: I do not do any drugs. > Annoyed Interviewer: I did not ask about drugs. I asked about medications. So this is an example of \*you \*giving an unhelpful response? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unhelpful-responses/824646.md?page=3)