# Unintentionally amusing nude scenes **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 15, 2004, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-amusing-nude-scenes/240169 "2004-04-15T14:48:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2004, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-amusing-nude-scenes/240169/61 "2004-04-20T17:41:07Z")
> [@Bambi Hassenpfeffer](#): > > What, no mention of _[The Thomas Crown Affair](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0155267/)_, where Rene Russo just kept turning up gratuitously naked? For the especially cynical among us, there’s some added amusement here. Apparently Ms. Russo is an extremely devout Christian, and in publicity interviews for the movie, she described at length how she had engaged in a lot of soul-searching and prayer about whether or not it was the right thing for her to do at that time. Based on the movie, we know what her decision (discovery?) was. So now I have an image of Rene on her knees, looking up to the sky, asking, “What would Jesus do?” And God responding with, “If Jesus had titties, he would shake them like a Polaroid picture. That’s what Jesus would do. Go forth and jiggle in peace, my child.” ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2004, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-amusing-nude-scenes/240169/62 "2004-04-20T18:10:36Z")
So God is a rapper of some kind! Where does he stand on the East Coast-West Coast feud? ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2004, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-amusing-nude-scenes/240169/63 "2004-04-20T23:54:05Z")
> [@Bambi Hassenpfeffer](#): > > That particular film also featured the most obvious product placement I’d ever seen, for Pepsi. Rene and someone were chatting in an office, and she picked up a Pepsi can. Suddenly the camera switched to a shot of her head and upper body, more or less filling the frame, with the Pepsi can to her lips. The can was of course rotated and centered perfectly in her hand to expose the logo, and she was holding her fingers carefully so as not to obscure any part of it. As soon as she pulled the can away, it cut back to the prior two-shot. Maybe…didn’t the same movie have some security guards zooming on on Brosnan’s watch, and making a big deal over what brand it was? ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-amusing-nude-scenes/240169/64 "2004-04-21T01:16:35Z")
So, apparently no actor or actress should ever commit the offense of being over 40 – at least if they’re going to do a nude scene. Okay. (Granted, both Kirk Douglas and Michael have completely flat asses.) Does anybody remember a movie called _Tarzan, the Ape Man_? It ostensibly starred Miles O’Keefe as an oddly mute Tarzan, but it was really a John Derek vehicle for his wife, Bo. She’s naked through about half the movie, which is nice eye candy, but she seems so spacey that you have to wonder what kind of drugs John was giving her. You may burst out laughing at the line, “They’re washing me just like a horse!” Richard Harris, of all people, plays her father. > [@](#): > > The in-disguise Uther having his way with Igrayne in Excalibur is a riot. I mean, c’mon. In full plate-mail? Talk about some major chafing. This has been covered before on the SDMB, but here goes. First, there’s no such thing as “plate-mail”. There’s mail, and there’s plate. Uther (disguised as the Duke of Cornwall) is wearing a rather fancifal version of full plate armor. In order to impregnate Igrayne (played by the director’s 17-year-old daughter), he need only lift up his tassets, untie his brayette from either his arming cote or his trews, untie his trews and either pull them down or just tear them asunder, and away we go. Personally, I would have unbuckled and removed the tassets altogether to avoid bruising the girl’s tender underaged skin, but if I recall, they were left in place. In short, it’s possible, but I don’t recommend it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-amusing-nude-scenes/240169.md?page=3)