# Unintentionally funny signs/ads **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 24, 2015, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695 "2015-05-24T03:08:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![funky\_little\_lee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@funky\_little\_lee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/funky_little_lee)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/1 "2015-05-24T03:08:32Z")
Yesterday while driving out of the mini-mart parking lot I was confronted with a hand-lettered sign: FREE KIDS FOOTBALL WEEKEND Had to parse that for a moment, but to be fair it was early in the morning. Last summer our neighbors got their driveway repaved. The guy who paved it left little flyers on nearby driveways that said: (guy’s name) DRIVEWAY SERVICE I JUST DID YOUR NEIGHBORS There’s probably been a zillion threads on this, but what have you seen recently? ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/2 "2015-05-24T12:35:35Z")
I see some of those “garage sale” type of signs around here every once in a while that say “GIANT KIDS SALE!” And I always think, “No thanks, I don’t need any giant kids.” ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/3 "2015-05-24T12:44:34Z")
For the past few years I keep seeing the same bumper sticker over and over. I haven’t been close enough to read one, but it’s got two lines of cursive and some kind of yellow splotch in the middle. Then my mom got a magnet of one. [Here it is](https://kiltsandkale.files.wordpress.com/2015/04/love-people-cook-them-tasty-food.jpg). It says. Love People Cook them tasty food. I’ve been sooooo tempted to run around and put a comma (period?) between cook them and tasty food. I honesty read it that way the first time I finally saw it and thought it was a joke. ---
**Author:** ![JWT\_Kottekoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3ec8ea/32.png) [@JWT\_Kottekoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JWT_Kottekoe)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/4 "2015-05-24T17:36:23Z")
Slow children at play ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/5 "2015-05-24T18:39:30Z")
A store I shopped at had a display by the register with a sign over it saying “POTHOS”. I thought “Porthos? Potholes? Portholes?” Then I saw the plant… ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/6 "2015-05-24T18:49:18Z")
There used to be a commercial food service company (local to Northern California, I think) that had “Enjoy life… eat out more often” on its trucks in flowing script. I think - but can no longer recall for sure - that a variant was “Please your wife - eat out [tonight | more often].” Not in the same class, but it’s bugged me for way too many years: “Integrity is Our Service” on a tire shop. Not the marquee - the very expensive and stylish site sign. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/7 "2015-05-24T20:28:03Z")
Special offer! Buy one get one free on all mens shoes. Erm… isn’t that how buying shoes normally works ? ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/8 "2015-05-24T20:34:51Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > A store I shopped at had a display by the register with a sign over it saying “POTHOS”. > > Then I saw the plant… Pot hos, just like crack-hos, but not fully certified yet. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/9 "2015-05-24T22:45:23Z")
Bob’s Butcher Shop _You can chew my bone, but you can’t beat my meat!_ ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/10 "2015-05-24T23:28:26Z")
> [@Shoeless](#): > > I see some of those “garage sale” type of signs around here every once in a while that say “GIANT KIDS SALE!” And I always think, “No thanks, I don’t need any giant kids.” And I don’t even need any garages. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/11 "2015-05-24T23:30:07Z")
City limit Enforced by radar. (Seen in San Luis Obispo, IIRC.) ---
**Author:** ![DinoR](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dinor/32/2821_2.png) [@DinoR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DinoR)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/12 "2015-05-24T23:32:27Z")
Long ago but it still sticks with me. A little corner store in the country that ran a fireworks concession around the back during the summer and had a banner facing the street. “Fireworks in rear!!!” :eek: OWWWW. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/13 "2015-05-25T00:08:07Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#): > > Not in the same class, but it’s bugged me for way too many years: “Integrity is Our Service” on a tire shop. Not the marquee - the very expensive and stylish site sign. Does Yoda work there? Once, outside a grocery store, the sign that always announced what was on sale that day said “One gal homo $1.” Lesbians are cheap. Stock up. There’s also one that I guess is unavoidable, but there are a lot of cemeteries in Indiana that started out as family burial plots, so they’re called “The Hamer Cemetery,” or the “Harris-Newman Cemetery.” There’s one where the original family had what is actually a fairly common name around here, and the word probably did not have its slang meaning when the cemetery was named. Anyway, it’s “The Gross Cemetery.” It happens a lot, and in the early days of the internet, you could find lots of photos of fast food restaurants advertising for “closers,” where the “C” had fallen off the sign. Nonetheless, I still laugh every time I see that McDonald’s is “NOW HIRING LOSERS.” ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/14 "2015-05-25T00:37:52Z")
> [@DinoR](#): > > “Fireworks in rear!!!” :eek: OWWWW. There was an automotive shop that moved twice in the years I knew it, and each time it took the back half of a facility. Its sign thus always read like an AIDS warning/invitation: **CAPITAL TRANSMISSION IN REAR** ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/15 "2015-05-25T00:53:51Z")
There was a car dealership in town that jumped on the pink ribbon bandwagon, with a huge, like, six-foot cling ribbon in the window. Whoever put it up missed the point of the pink ribbon campaign-- confused it with the yellow ribbon for the troops, or something (or maybe wasn’t a native English speaker). Anyway, under the ribbon it said “Support Breast Cancer.” When I told that story to a friend, she told me that there was once a “Rally for Melanoma” in her town. “Yay! You go, Melanoma!” ---
**Author:** ![3trew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/13edae/32.png) [@3trew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3trew)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/16 "2015-05-25T05:52:28Z")
An item called “Pro Select Crack Fix” Newspaper headline for local sports team: “Riders Ready for Willy After Romp” A food label: “FAP Pacific Rock Cheese” Store signs: “Women’s Dresses”, “Women’s Bras”. A product called Touch Kids Lunch Fork Several final product signs with their Lorem Ipsum still there, not replaced by actual copy. A product called an Aqua Zoom Osculating Sprinkler. A children’s video called Pony Play Date. I show the picture of that one to people to see how they react. ---
**Author:** ![JKellyMap](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jkellymap/32/15880_2.png) [@JKellyMap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JKellyMap)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/17 "2015-05-25T06:27:10Z")
> [@3trew](#): > > A children’s video called Pony Play Date. I show the picture of that one to people to see how they react. ??? ---
**Author:** ![3trew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/13edae/32.png) [@3trew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3trew)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/18 "2015-05-25T06:32:53Z")
Google “Pony Play”. Don’t do it at work. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 10:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/19 "2015-05-25T10:49:42Z")
It wasn’t a sign, but it was a bit of garbled English with similar humorous results. First, there’s a large children’s hospital in Indianapolis called “Riley,” named for James Whitcomb Riley, a bizarre poet I don’t like, whom some people in Indiana are fanatically proud of. Anyway, many years ago, Riley was running ads for some fundraiser for their new burn unit, and they had a racecar driver in one of the ads, asking people to participate in a fundraiser to raise money which would be given “to burn children at Riley Hospital.” Direct quote. Not “_for_ burn children,” not “to the burn _unit_,” not “to burn_ed_ children.” Nope. The commercial ran a lot, and I’m positive that is exactly what he said “to burn children.” ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e4f/32.png) [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_is_the_new_Analog)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695/20 "2015-05-25T13:36:33Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > There was a car dealership in town that jumped on the pink ribbon bandwagon, with a huge, like, six-foot cling ribbon in the window. Whoever put it up missed the point of the pink ribbon campaign-- confused it with the yellow ribbon for the troops, or something (or maybe wasn’t a native English speaker). Anyway, under the ribbon it said “Support Breast Cancer.” > > When I told that story to a friend, she told me that there was once a “Rally for Melanoma” in her town. “Yay! You go, Melanoma!” In college, I ran a 5k called the Run for Sickle Cell. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unintentionally-funny-signs-ads/720695.md?page=2)