# Universe tells gotpasswords that he can't have the free Doritos

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/universe-tells-gotpasswords-that-he-cant-have-the-free-doritos/268769>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [October 12, 2004, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/universe-tells-gotpasswords-that-he-cant-have-the-free-doritos/268769 "2004-10-12T03:35:11Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/universe-tells-gotpasswords-that-he-cant-have-the-free-doritos/268769/1 "2004-10-12T03:35:11Z")

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Once again, I find myself in a Minneapolis hotel room. Like clockwork, one week a month, I make the trek from San Francisco to Minneapolis for business.

I wanted something to drink, so I go down the hall to the vending machines. I feed my money into the Coke machine, and just as I press the button, I spot a bag of Doritos dangling precariously from the top row of another vending machine. I wrestle the bottle out of the machine (is it just me, or have the machine makers made it more difficult to retrieve a bottle? They always seem to be tilted _just so_ when they drop and I have to reach up into the belly of the machine to pop it loose and get it to drop all the way out.)

Anyway…this is about Doritos, not inconvenient soda machines.

The bag of the afore-mentioned cheesy salty orangey crunchy goodness is clinging to the very end of the spring coil that’s supposed to push it forward until it drops into the basket. Rather than make a racket beating and banging on the machine or trying to rock it and jolt the chips loose, I figure that I can buy the bag behind it, and have a twofer. I’m going to be in this hotel long enough for this to be a viable plan. I slide a dollar bill at the machine. It does not go into the machine.

I see the light. Exact change only.

Alas, I am unable to convince the machine that 18 cents is anywhere close to exact change. So, I head back to my room with no Doritos.

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**Author:** ![Rhubarb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/59ef9b/32.png) [@Rhubarb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhubarb)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/universe-tells-gotpasswords-that-he-cant-have-the-free-doritos/268769/2 "2004-10-12T03:41:53Z")

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Go ahead and smack the machine around a little. If anyone asks, it took YOUR money. Doritos are too important to just leave dangling.

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**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/universe-tells-gotpasswords-that-he-cant-have-the-free-doritos/268769/3 "2004-10-12T15:10:24Z")

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Free the Doritos! Free the Doritos!