# Unreasonable Standards For Every Body Part, Only $9.95! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 7, 2003, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654 "2003-05-07T13:52:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/1 "2003-05-07T13:52:26Z")
_I apologize for the lack of colorful profanities in this rant, but if I typed what I really was thinking the servers would melt down and we’d have barbecued hamsters._ It is one of the stereotypes of women that we have a problem accepting our bodies. A negative body image is almost expected for those of us who bear two X chromosomes. The media are constantly showing us unreasonable standards of beauty with pencil-thin models, teenage girls with absolutely perfect skin, and porn stars with bulbous fake boobs, among others. I’ll admit, I’ve had a problem accepting myself as beautiful. It took a very good friend and ten years of losing steroid weight before I looked in the mirror and said, “Dang, I’m hot!” But there was always one part of my body that I was perfectly fine with. One part of every woman’s body that I thought–silly me–was immune to Negative Body Image. How wrong I was. Recently I discovered a website called [vaginainstitute.com](http://vaginainstitute.com) This is not a worksafe site as it contains pictures of what it discusses, namely The Perfect Vulva. It also contains detailed descriptions of The Perfect Vulva. Submitted for your perusal: [The Perfect Vulva.](http://www.vaginainstitute.com/The_Ideal_Vagina/The_ideal_vaginal_looks_prefer/the_ideal_vaginal_looks_prefer.shtml) > [@](#): > > The labia majora (outer vaginal lips) should be well formed, they should be perfectly round forming an ached look between the female legs, these lips should be free from dimples, warts, crevices, wrinkles and colour discrepancies without excessive hair follicles (men tend to view excessive hair as a male characteristic). The closer a female has her labia majora to these ideals, the more attractive her genitalia become to males as viewing it as something normal. > > The labia minora (inner vaginal lips) should not protrude past the outer vaginal lips. Almost all males do not like the look of long inner vaginal lips. Long inner vaginal lips are deformities of the female reproductive organ and men do not like these abnormalities to be present on the female body. The inner lips should reside hidden by the outer lips, they should also be symmetrical in length and shape. Having one labia that is asymmetrical is once again a deformity of the female genitalia. Perfectly developed women will always have symmetrical labia minora which do no protrude past the outer lips, they will also have labia minora that is smooth and even without excessive folds or crevices and wrinkles. The inner lips should be free from any presence of hair and should take on a pink colour tone, slight colour variations will vary between ethnic groups. The inner lips should not be thick or have darkening at the tips. This ideal is ever so becoming as something that men want and desire in the female form. > > The clitoris should not be excessively long, but at the same time it should not be hidden from view, many men find it arousing to see the clitoris becoming erected as it shows function of the female reproductive organ. There is one increasing ideal that men are seeking and that is being able to see the glans of the clitoris with a small hood. The hood should not fully cover the entire clitoris and it should not be thick or dark with flaps of skin hanging every where. A clean even look is preferred by most men. > > The size of the vagina should be small, almost all men would say that smaller is better, it provides pleasure to men, so consequently they prefer a small vagina. They also prefer a small vagina, because genitalia is not the best looking part of the female body, so a small vaginal canal looks better and functions at optimal performance. It also represents health of the female, a healthy women will always have a tight and small vagina as she has maintained her vaginal tone, in essence she has taken care of her vagina and not neglected it. Size does matter, but its female size which comes into play since many women do suffer a size alteration with their vaginas and most all men seek women with a healthy and tight vaginal tone. Then comes this claim: > [@](#): > > These are the main characteristics that 96% of the male population seek on behalf of women. Notice the links on the main page to labia and vulva enhancement sites so that you, too, can live up to these standards Preferred By 96% of Men. But wait! It gets better! On the main page, members can read articles discussing the following: > [@](#): > > “Females with larger vagina’s (sic) produce more vaginal odors.” > _An interesting fact about females and the size of their vagina, is that it has a direct correlation between the amount of vaginal odour that they produce, females with…_ Grammar check, anyone? > [@](#): > > “Women with smaller vagina’s (again, sic) enjoy more orgasms.” > _Not being able to achieve an orgasm is a female inadequacy which tends to be less present with females that have a smaller or tighter vagina when compared to females with a loose vagina, this is…_ I guess no one took me up on that grammar check. When we poor, unenlightened non-members click these links, we are redirected to [this page.](http://www.vaginainstitute.com/Register/index.html) (Contains the back of a nude woman.) For just $9.95, we can get such valuable information as the world’s largest vaginal data collection centre, statistics about vaginal, clitoral, and labia size, and what a normal and healthy vulva is and what the deformities are. (Judging by the pictures on the site, pubic hair is a deformity). And then there are the testimonials… > [@](#): > > I needed to know whether or not I was normal, and the Vagina Institute provided me with the answers I was seeking. > Wendy M. > > My vulva is hideously grotesque, but with the Vagina Institute, I know now which parts I need to change & improve. > Ann Marie S. > > Finally something that puts our vagina’s in clear perspective without the constant masking of the truth, looks do matter! > Jenny R. Wha…but…sputter…sputter…brain exploding… :eek: :mad: :eek: :mad: :eek: :mad: :eek: :mad: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!?! I’m not even going to go into the same flippin’ model on every page with her “trendily mussed” blonde hair. I hate her. If you want even more fun, take the [the online quiz](http://www.vaginainstitute.com/womanhood/index.shtml) to see if you are one of the lucky ones who possess The Perfect Vulva. (No pictures except a nude woman lying on her stomach on top of the page.) Me and my Imperfect Hideous Vulva are going to kick this site repeatedly with jackboots to make ourselves feel better. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Blunty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@Captain\_Blunty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Blunty)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/2 "2003-05-07T14:30:21Z")
Those people cannot be _serous!_ That was one of the most ridiculous things I have ever seen! It infuriates me to think that some women could come across that site and go away thinking that their vagina is abnormal or “ugly.” I don’t even want to think about the women who go away and have surgery because of shit like this. These, ahem, “people”, should be ashamed of themselves. I took that shitty quiz too, and according to those nutjobs I have a vagina of average apperance. Hey buddy, I like it, and I have never had any complaints. And I’ll wager my orgasm against _any_ woman who has a so called “perfect vagina.” (note: THEY DO NOT EXSIST!!!) **Spazcat** , your rant was great. I couldn’t have said it better myself. (And I didn’t.) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Fin\_man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/51bf81/32.png) [@Fin\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fin_man)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/3 "2003-05-07T15:05:06Z")
I can’t wait until I get home tonight - damn filters at work. I’m sure I’ll be outraged at the statements but I’m also sure I’ll like the pictures. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Edward\_The\_Head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ce73a5/32.png) [@Edward\_The\_Head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Edward_The_Head)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/4 "2003-05-07T15:14:10Z")
It’s got to be a joke. I think the responces gave it away. Besides how many guys are gonna be looking at your pussy and say “Your lips are not symmetrical, get out of my bed!” Any idiot that would say that is not thinking with the right head! 😃 Heck I wouldn’t even know what symmetrical meant at a time like that. SpazCat, your pussy looks fine from over here. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/5 "2003-05-07T15:16:17Z")
> [@](#): > > I’m sure I’ll be outraged at the statements but I’m also sure I’ll like the pictures. Prepare for disappointment. No pix of vaginas. Just women in bathing suits or tastefully nude (sideways, so you can’t see anything). This has to be a joke site. It doesn’t resemble anything serious. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/6 "2003-05-07T15:21:56Z")
I’m going with joke as well. But very well done, a lot like Landover Baptist. ---
**Author:** ![ratty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ccd318/32.png) [@ratty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratty)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/7 "2003-05-07T15:29:45Z")
Wait a minute. Are you sure this isn’t some sort of elaborate joke? Or some incredibly convoluted lead-in to a porn site? I was reading through the stuff on that page, and it’s just too…much. Humans just don’t think like this unless they’re a) crazy or b) joking. I’ll admit, it’s pretty subtle, but some of the language seems like a give-away that somebody’s pulling a fast one. “Ever so becoming”? “Hideously grotesque”? It’s almost Onion-like. The fact that they want money is also suspicious. It must be either a pay porn site or a pay humor site. If someone was actually conducting some sort of study on the human vagina and its perception in various cultures as determined by appearance, (which is reasonable, I suppose) they would not be using language like “ever so becoming” and I seriously doubt they’d want $9.95 for the privilege of viewing their research. If these people are actually serious…well, I don’t even know what to say. I guess there could well be vagina fashion Nazis out there. _shrug_ If that’s what these people choose to believe, that’s their business. The only thing that concerns me is the easily manipulated faction of women who have serious self-esteem issues and will be terrorized by the thought that their vulva might not be perfect. I mean, cosmetic surgery on the labia? Please. Unless you can quite literally throw 'em o’er your shoulder like a Continental soldier, I’d say you’re fine. Even then such a skill might come in handy. Suffice to say, if I ever catch somebody near my hoo-ha pulling out a measuring tape, they will receive a swift kick to the forehead and no mistake. It’s a privilege to be allowed down there in the first place. Don’t talk to me about the “perfect vulva”. To most men I know, the “perfect vulva” is whichever one is closest to hand. ---
**Author:** ![XJETGIRLX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9fc29f/32.png) [@XJETGIRLX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XJETGIRLX)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/8 "2003-05-07T15:33:16Z")
Well, I don’t know. It could very well be serious. I haven’t clicked on the link (being at work & all) but this reminded me of something I saw on Berman & Berman once. I happened to be flipping through, and they had a woman on there who had had plastic surgery done ‘down there’ to even out the inner labia, as they were of larger than average size. First thought through my mind was “WTF?” but they did a whole interview with her, the surgeon who did her surgery, and started talking about how wonderful it was that you could do that kind of plastic surgery, and what kind of women might want to have it done. As stupid and vulgar as I think the whole topic is, I unfortunately think it may not be just a joke. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/9 "2003-05-07T15:37:32Z")
The comments from ‘members’ that say: “My vulva is hideously grotesque, but with the Vagina Institute, I know now which parts I need to change & improve.” assure me that it’s a joke. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/10 "2003-05-07T15:46:50Z")
What the fuck??!! That’s right up there with those web sites that provide how-to manuals on bulemia. I hope to God that web site is a joke. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/11 "2003-05-07T15:50:34Z")
H’uh? Most vulvas are ugly anyways (sorry, but I find the female genitalia really ugly…). Who cares? It’s your GENITALIA. It’s not how it looks-it’s how it performs! ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/12 "2003-05-07T16:00:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CalMeacham \* > \*\*Prepare for disappointment. No pix of vaginas. Just women in bathing suits or tastefully nude (sideways, so you can’t see anything). > > This has to be a joke site. It doesn’t resemble anything serious. \*\* The main page has two (2) full-on views of the female fun bits. I don’t think it’s a joke site. I think it’s affiliated with plastic surgery centers (centres, if you prefer). There are three sidebar likns on the main page to sites advertising mammary enhancement, labial enhancement, and female pumping (whatever that is). Even if it is a joke, that doesn’t make it any less stupid/disgusting/insert adjective here. ---
**Author:** ![Feynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecb155/32.png) [@Feynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feynn)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/13 "2003-05-07T17:06:52Z")
The Vagina Institute - “Researching female genital size since 1995.” That’s only 8 years of research, what can they possibly know? I’ve been researching female genitalia for much longer then that… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/14 "2003-05-07T17:08:10Z")
If it is affiliated with legitimate plastic surgery centers, I think it’s cause for concern that every single instance of the plural of “vagina” on the site is spelled “vagina’s”. Not to mention all the “vulva’s”. I also find it more than a little strange that they will allow you to have access to their data for $9.95 for thirty days, billed automatically thereafter at $5.95 per month. I think it’s a front for a pay-for-porn site. ---
**Author:** ![cowgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@cowgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cowgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/15 "2003-05-07T17:13:14Z")
Horrifying. I’m glad that for every body part I have there is someone to (a) tell me how inadequate it is and (b) sell me a solution to it. I’m CERTAIN that the reason many women don’t orgasm is because their vagina isn’t “perfect.” I would like to think it is a joke - but even if it is, I am sad but certain that many women _would_ be convinced by it. (“Oh no! Maybe _that’s_ why my husband left me! I need surgery TODAY!”) ---
**Author:** ![StarvingButStrong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/starvingbutstrong/32/335_2.png) [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/16 "2003-05-07T17:13:25Z")
"There is also the increasing problem that men ask their female counterparts to cover and conceal their vagina’s from view either by asking then to wear some panties of some other garment, so they do not see their vagina when making love. This problem is getting so bad because men are not finding women with a vagina that they prefer, over half of the male population have asked their partner to cover their vagina from their view. " Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Joke site, gotta be. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_great_unwashed/32/4791_2.png) [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/17 "2003-05-07T18:59:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > **H’uh? Most vulvas are ugly anyways (sorry, but I find the female genitalia really ugly** It’s just a matter of opinion, but, you are so wrong. I am sure the site is as genuine as the $9.95 price-tag to register suggests – it almost certainly funds itself on the prurience of adolescent males, the quotes are laughable. It makes me kind of icky to boast, but I was having a conversation with a long-time friend and she remembered a time shortly after her second child that she asked me to check if she was “alright”. We weren’t lovers at the time so that was pretty damned trusting of her. I told her honestly what I thought. I was absolutely gob-smacked when more than ten years later she tells me that she was grateful to know that she was normal and that I’d restored her confidence no end (and I was so, um, flattered, to have helped). So that’s my boast, pathetic isn’t it? BUT, this woman was (and still is) damned fucking attractive, really she would universally be received as “hot”, yet she harboured such negative opinions about the shape of her vulva that she remembers reassurances many years later. People who prey on other people’s fears are scum. No matter who the target “audience” is for the site, they are part of the problem. And on preview, what **Feynn** said, eight years? Pah! light-weights! ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/18 "2003-05-07T20:06:37Z")
I know, I’m just saying that I personally feel that way. Besides, it’s not like everyone sees it. I couldn’t care less about how my naughty bits look, as long as they’re healthy. ---
**Author:** ![ratty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ccd318/32.png) [@ratty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratty)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/19 "2003-05-07T21:42:49Z")
I’m with **Guin** here. Who the hell cares what your vulva looks like as long as it’s healthy? Are there really women out there wallowing in despair over the length to width ratio of their labia minora? Are there men out there who actually give a flying fuck about this? And there are actually plastic surgeons who have no qualms about taking thousands of dollars and reinforcing beauty terror tactics by agreeing to hack apart perfectly normal cooters? What the hell is this world coming to? ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654/20 "2003-05-07T22:42:32Z")
This thread is surreal. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/unreasonable-standards-for-every-body-part-only-9-95/173654.md?page=2)