# Upcoming News Stories **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 25, 2008, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483 "2008-11-25T21:47:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2008, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/1 "2008-11-25T21:47:05Z")
Just as sure as the winter snow we will soon see; 1. A picture of a solider at a inauguration rehearsal with a sign around his neck reading “President Obama.” 2. Outage on AM radio, “Did you see him salute that Marine? How dare he?” 3. A recorded message from Dick Clark on the New Years’ show. He is to ill to host, I bet. 4. At least one person nominated for the cabinet will not be approved. 5. What else? ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2008, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/2 "2008-11-25T21:48:59Z")
Somebody, somewhere, will find a reason to get pissed off that Obama is buying a dog. ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2008, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/3 "2008-11-25T21:58:39Z")
At least one member of the inner circle will utter the dreaded “I do not recall” in front of Congress within the first year. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2008, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/4 "2008-11-25T22:17:47Z")
Whatever Michelle and/or the kids wear for the Inauguration will be severely criticized. Obama’s first judicial nomination - a seemingly routine appointment to something like the U.S. District Court in Omaha, who has been recommended by both the state’s Senators, all of its representatives, a unanimous resolution by the state legislature and approved by the American Bar Association - will come under intense scrutiny because the candidate has no record either for or against abortion rights. An ordinary gang fight between two tribes in a central Asian country whose name no one can pronounce will be proclaimed as “the test” Biden said Obama would face. Amy Winehouse will overdose on drugs, proving that Obama is leading western civilization down the road to ruin, even though Winehouse isn’t even an American. In non-politcal news, worldwide media coverage will focus on New York City trying to dig out from under a 4-inch snowfall. Meanwhile, Buffalo, NY will have had 31 inches of snow the same evening and be doing just fine. ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2008, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/5 "2008-11-25T23:12:35Z")
**kunilou** is good at this. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Knig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@Typo\_Knig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Knig)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/6 "2008-11-26T02:17:23Z")
[Aliens say: “Send more Chuck Berry!”](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voyager_Golden_Record#Appearances_in_fiction) ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/7 "2008-11-26T03:39:06Z")
> [@Typo\_Knig](#): > > [Aliens say: “Send more Chuck Berry!”](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voyager_Golden_Record#Appearances_in_fiction) Worse than that. Aliens say: “Don’t have analog turntables anymore. Send CD!” ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/8 "2008-11-26T05:23:42Z")
> [@kunilou](#): > > Amy Winehouse will overdose on drugs, proving that Obama is leading western civilization down the road to ruin, even though Winehouse isn’t even an American. [http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/showbiz/2008-11/26/content\_7240531.htm](http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/showbiz/2008-11/26/content_7240531.htm) I dunno if that’s a prediction or not. It happened before you made it. ---
**Author:** ![dalej42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@dalej42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalej42)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/9 "2008-11-26T05:43:46Z")
There will be rain in Southern California. The news will cover it as if Noah was sailing the ark right down the freeway. We’re not celebrating New Years Eve because of the economic crisis. People are staying at home on New Year’s Eve because of their 401k balance, not because it falls in the middle of the week. ---
**Author:** ![audit1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@audit1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/audit1)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 9:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/10 "2008-11-26T09:18:27Z")
Airports will be crowded with holiday travelers this season. With a live report here is our correspondent at the airport. ---
**Author:** ![audit1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@audit1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/audit1)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 9:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/11 "2008-11-26T09:22:20Z")
We will see a report on how a small town marching band came up with a creative way to raise money to go to the inaugural parade. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 9:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/12 "2008-11-26T09:34:55Z")
The dollar will rise. Economists will be concerned. Shortly thereafter, the dollar will fall. Economists will be concerned. ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/13 "2008-11-26T10:50:35Z")
> [@audit1](#): > > We will see a report on how a small town marching band came up with a creative way to raise money to go to the inaugural parade. Darn you! I forgot that one. Back to our live reporter with the Marine Corps Band (“The President’s Own”) on the subject of a special march that can be played on frozen instruments. We will also have a piece about what presidents and presidents=elect talk about on the drive from the White House to the Capitol. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/14 "2008-11-26T11:27:28Z")
> [@E-Sabbath](#): > > [http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/showbiz/2008-11/26/content\_7240531.htm](http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/showbiz/2008-11/26/content_7240531.htm) > > I dunno if that’s a prediction or not. It happened before you made it. Wow, in that pic she looks like a young Keith Richard. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/15 "2008-11-26T11:29:34Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > The dollar will rise. Economists will be concerned. Shortly thereafter, the dollar will fall. Economists will be concerned. After an unusually long period of stability for the price of dollars, economists will be concerned. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/16 "2008-11-26T11:40:35Z")
The credit crunch means that people will buy less during this Christmas season. There will be many sales. The media will cover this obsessively. Robert Peston will have a nervous breakdown due to overwork. Economists will be concerned. The Christmas #1 single will be hyped to high heaven and then instantly forgotten. ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/17 "2008-11-26T13:12:26Z")
Local and state police forces will be out in force over the New Years’ holiday, adopting a “zero tolerance” policy towards drunk driving. Local taxi ab companies will be offering free rides home for people too drunk to drive. ---
**Author:** ![Neidhart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Neidhart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neidhart)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/18 "2008-11-26T13:19:36Z")
Chinese toy recalled because it contains lead. And has small parts. Good Samaritan does something heartwarming. Homeless people still homeless. Baby needs liver transplant. Gene for $DISEASE discovered; actual cure, if any, still 50 years in the future. Oh yeah, and new environmental data shows the effects of climate change will be so extreme that the human race will be extinct in 200 years. ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/19 "2008-11-26T13:21:03Z")
A small town somewhere will erect a nativity scene in front of City Hall. A dust-up will ensue. Somehow, and I’m not sure how yet, the right wing will attack Obama over it. ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2008, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483/20 "2008-11-26T14:16:13Z")
A pretty white woman will go missing. Her remains may or may not be found, but her husband will be arrested and charged with her murder. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/upcoming-news-stories/474483.md?page=2)