# \[UPDATE--KIDNEY FOUND\](step) Dad's in stage 5 renal failure. Am I nuts to consider giving a kidney? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 31, 2014, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033 "2014-03-31T23:52:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![usedtobe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ec9cab/32.png) [@usedtobe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/usedtobe)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2014, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/41 "2014-11-02T01:57:02Z")
nm ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2014, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/42 "2014-11-02T03:39:39Z")
Hoping for good news šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2014, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/43 "2014-11-02T04:10:08Z")
He went into surgery about 8pm. Itā€™s 11 now and mom hasnā€™t called with an update, but they said it would be about 3 hours. So it seems itā€™s going as expected so far. Work isnā€™t too busy, so I should get out on time and maybe talk to mom before she heads to the hotel. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2014, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/44 "2014-11-08T06:45:03Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > He went into surgery about 8pm. Itā€™s 11 now and mom hasnā€™t called with an update, but they said it would be about 3 hours. So it seems itā€™s going as expected so far. Work isnā€™t too busy, so I should get out on time and maybe talk to mom before she heads to the hotel. Are you able to drop by with an update? It would be appreciated šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2014, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/45 "2014-11-08T07:24:26Z")
Oh, yes! Heā€™s doing great. Was in hospital Sat-Tues, then moved to the longer-term ā€œcleanā€ housing where he will be for 3-4 weeks with my mom as his ā€œcaretaker.ā€ Itā€™s an interim housing setup with 70 rooms and communal kitchens and living rooms. No TVā€™s in the bedrooms, they donā€™t want anyone laying in bed watching TV all day. Heā€™s up and about, encouraged to walk around the building and can go out for meals and grocery shopping and stuff, as long as heā€™s careful about wearing a mask and washing his hands. Heā€™s getting blood drawn and checkups nearly every day, and thereā€™s a big adjustment with medications, which are constantly re-evaluated during this month. But, the kidney is producing well, perfusing well, and his biggest discomfort right now is the recovery from the abdominal surgery and the big incision. Heā€™s pretty sore, but really not complaining! Since I already had plane tickets for the 11th to 13th, Iā€™m going up there on Tuesday to visit. Visitors are allowed on the first floor, have to leave shoes and coats and other outerwear in the coat room (gotta remember to pack slipper socks), and cannot go up to the bedroom/living quarters areas. First floor has different receiving/entertainment rooms, though, which are designed for socializing between residents and any visitors they may have. So far, so good, yay! Thanks for asking! ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2014, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/46 "2014-11-08T10:25:46Z")
Great news! So glad to hear it šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Knig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@Typo\_Knig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Knig)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2014, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/47 "2014-11-08T12:49:08Z")
šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2014, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/48 "2014-11-08T17:59:22Z")
What wonderful news! Have a great visit. šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2014, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/49 "2014-11-08T18:38:30Z")
> [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](#): > > Iā€™ve got my fingers crossed for your dad. A friend had a kidney transplant several years ago (live donor) and almost immediately started feeling better. He was up and walking the next day, and only in the hospital for a few more after that. > > Mayo is good. Very very good. Your dad has a great chance of having this go well. Agreed; Mayo is an amazing place. Let him know how lucky he is to get care there. Fingers crossed here as well. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2014, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/50 "2014-11-15T03:14:26Z")
I visited Mom and Dad this week from Tue-Thur. Heā€™s healing very well, though his doc ordered a liter of fluid on both Tue and Thur, and added magnesium and potassium supplements for him to take. Dadā€™s a bigger dude and is used to feeling warmish most of the time. Since surgery, heā€™s constantly cold and canā€™t get comfortable. This is apparently normal, but itā€™s tough on him. On Thursday before I checked out from my hotel, they came to visit and see my room (a one-room suite). Dad ended up taking a couple hour nap in the nice squishy-yet-firm bed with the sherpa comforter and the heat turned up. The front desk let me check out late - everybody near Mayo is very accommodating to patients and their family! Heā€™s also not really comfortable walking much yet - was still using a wheelchair while I was visiting, days 10-12 post-op. Seems like he should be walking more, and the nurse heā€™s been seeing daily gave him a pedometer on Wednesday with orders to walk 2,000 steps a day. So itā€™s not just me thinking heā€™s babying it a little. Heā€™s getting mini checkups and blood drawn pretty much every day, and meds adjusted along with that. Heā€™s got a big book he has to keep everything written down in, and had two different education classes while I was there. The time I spent visiting was largely accompanying my folks to various appointments, learning the pedway system around the humongous Mayo campus, running small errands to give Mom a little break, and finding food for myself and them. Dadā€™s not eating much, but OK - heā€™s been on a weight loss track for about 6 months and is down 40 pounds, plus since heā€™s not moving a lot and body working on healing, heā€™s not as hungry as he used to be. Doctor is satisfied with how heā€™s doing and eating and adjusting so far. He may (might!) get home before Thanksgiving. Iā€™m pooped. Iā€™m just doing a half day at work today, itā€™s like Iā€™m jet-lagged since I had to time shift my schedule to 6 hours earlier than Iā€™m used to. I was getting up at 5am for three days when Iā€™m used to getting up at 11 or noon. Really disorienting to get up for the day when itā€™s still dark out! Anyway, Iā€™m glad I went, as are my folks, but I think the visiting was also draining for Dad and hopefully theyā€™ll settle into a quieter schedule that will keep him more comfortable and heal better in the next week or so. Anyone still following, thanks for keeping tabs! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Holdsworth\_Effect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/848f3c/32.png) [@The\_Holdsworth\_Effect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Holdsworth_Effect)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/51 "2014-11-17T02:18:56Z")
Good to hear. You are amazing, and kudos to you. Iā€™m channeling your mom šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033/52 "2014-11-17T04:30:33Z")
Glad heā€™s doing well! Thatā€™s great news. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-kidney-found-step-dads-in-stage-5-renal-failure-am-i-nuts-to-consider-giving-a-kidney/685033.md?page=2)