# Update - Stepfather pleads to child molestation charges. Need advice. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 28, 2009, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-stepfather-pleads-to-child-molestation-charges-need-advice/494594 "2009-04-28T04:57:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Green\_Cymbeline](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_cymbeline/32/9244_2.png) [@Green\_Cymbeline](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Cymbeline)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-stepfather-pleads-to-child-molestation-charges-need-advice/494594/81 "2009-06-09T01:13:57Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > **nyctea** , question for you: what do you want to see happen? Here, take my magic wand, and think about what you want before you wave it. > > 'Cause I have to be honest - it looks like nothing this woman can do will please you. This thread and others have been all about how terrible a mother she is to keep these kids with her husband, in a state far, far away, and now she’s moved them away from him, to a state much closer to you, with an affordable rent and a cousin who needs her help and can help her out, and that’s not good, either? What do you want? I said in my update post that “I don’t know what to think… I don’t have a good feeling…” Her move was so sudden, which makes me think it was a knee-jerk reaction done for the wrong reasons, without really thinking through the pros and cons. I think uprooting the kids so suddenly, the very day after their stepfather is sent to prison, to go to a place where they know nobody except for a cousin Susan barely knows could be confusing, frightening and stressful to the kids, and take away any sense of security they had left. Greg’s kids were enrolled in summer camps and sports activities and were looking forward to hanging out with their friends and playing at their grandparent’s pool. Now all of a sudden, their stepdad disappears and they are driving across the country with no money to an unknown place, with a relatively unknown person (the cousin). Are they frightened? Do they know what is going on and why? I don’t know, because when Greg attempted to gauge their feelings, he was reprimanded by Susan. I acknowledge that perhaps it might turn out to be a good thing. That would be awesome. But the suddenness of it, and the fact that it appears not to be thought through very well, makes me skeptical. But I am willing to wait and see. ---
**Author:** ![legalsnugs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/45deac/32.png) [@legalsnugs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/legalsnugs)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-stepfather-pleads-to-child-molestation-charges-need-advice/494594/82 "2009-06-09T10:34:14Z")
> [@emmaliminal](#): > > …Yes, she and the kids are now closer to Greg and has more affordable rent. But Susan is still interfering with Greg’s fathering, is still making questionable life choices, is still involved with Stepfather the Molester’s family, and _is still relying on Greg’s child support to support more than just Greg’s kids._ Not to mention that she did _nothing_ to protect the children and even fought to have him returned to the home to await trial. Extreme denial, during which time he could have been molesting the children in the home. My question: where is the guardian ad litem in all this? What has he/she reported? Also, the fact that Greg’s child support is being used to support everyone is not a kick in the balls. He is paying court-ordered support for his own children. If the court determines she is not using the support solely for his children (reasonable pro-rata rent and utilities count), he can request it be reduced. My fear would be that she would either countersue, or even file, for an increase in support due to a material change in circumstance. Might fly, might not. I agree he should go for full custody and that he should immediately start taking advantage of every single minute of his court-ordered visitation (he should have the order registered in the new state so it can be enforced there), and talk to the children. Sounds like exW doesn’t give them any privacy on the phone. Just my two cents. ---
**Author:** ![Harriet\_the\_Spry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e56c9b/32.png) [@Harriet\_the\_Spry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harriet_the_Spry)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-stepfather-pleads-to-child-molestation-charges-need-advice/494594/83 "2009-06-09T14:32:32Z")
One other thing to keep in mind is that ex-wife may be eligible for some public assistance since she no longer has the stepfather’s income. This could be especially important for health insurance for the younger kids. She should be encouraged to apply for any public aid she’s eligible for. It will likely be accompanied by a caseworker working with her to get her into a job. ---
**Author:** ![ratatoskK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ratatoskk/32/2987_2.png) [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-stepfather-pleads-to-child-molestation-charges-need-advice/494594/84 "2009-06-09T16:47:35Z")
Greg should get his kids back. It’s good that he wants them back and good of you to be interested in helping. Re: Susan and her own kids, that’s not your problem. I’m glad the guy’s going to jail. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/update-stepfather-pleads-to-child-molestation-charges-need-advice/494594.md?page=4)