# Us low-end baristas can't read your fucking minds (mild and pointless) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 17, 2003, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908 "2003-03-17T02:56:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2003, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/21 "2003-03-17T17:38:05Z")
Someone who serves coffee and doughnuts at Tim’s is not a barista. There’s no steamed milk. There’s no foam. There’s no chance in hell you’re going to get an espresso and the hot-chocolate comes out of a machine. Hence, no barista. Coffee server? Sure. Barista? No. Anyhow - they make a mean doughnut at Tim’s. Their sammy’s are pretty good too. Buck up - it’s the joys of customer service. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Belrix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed655f/32.png) [@Belrix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belrix)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2003, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/22 "2003-03-17T20:23:34Z")
One of the “Who’s Talking” movies had the John Travolta cab-driver character giving a description of “Black” vs. “Regular” vs. “Light”, etc. He was playing a NY cabbie I think. Charles Kuralt’s autobiography (A life on the Road?)did a similar description. I have neither at my disposal right now but the “regular”, “light”, thing seems to be known in New York. A McDonalds in Boston mixed my cream & sugar for me, too, FWIW. ---
**Author:** ![Cerowyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/82dd89/32.png) [@Cerowyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerowyn)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2003, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/23 "2003-03-17T20:43:11Z")
With all due respect to pretty much every other Canadian, I really find it hard to drink Tim Horton’s coffee (and pretty much every other donut store coffee I’ve ever had). I adore their wonderful donuts, but rarely have more than one or two a year (a sad necessity for my already over-developed waist-line). **jin** , you’ll have to come up for one of the Toronto-area Dopefests, and we’ll send you back with a car-load of Timbits. My treat. **lola** , my heart goes out to you. I’ve sometimes observed that Tim Horton’s attracts the worst elements of Canadian society (especially obnoxious teenagers). Which, I guess, suggests that we’re not all that bad off. Just you get to deal with it. ---
**Author:** ![Audrey\_Levins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Audrey\_Levins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Audrey_Levins)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2003, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/24 "2003-03-17T21:05:13Z")
Never heard of someone else sugar-and-creaming coffee for you. This must be a Canadian thing. The only thing I pray for when I buy a cup of coffee at Starbucks is that there will be half and half in the cream carafes so I’m not forced to use milk or two percent. (The coffee won’t be the right color and consistency if it’s just milk. Gotta have half and half.) And I wish they would go back to using sugar shakers instead of just packets of sugar; aren’t they supposed to be some kind of New Age We Care About the World kind of place? Why waste all that paper, and make me stand there like a moron tearing open tiny packets for ten minutes? And has anybody else ever been as annoyed as me when they run out of white sugar, and all that’s left are those little packets of brown “Sugar In the Raw,” or whatever the hell it is? That stuff’s nasty! Doesn’t melt, and makes your coffee taste funky. I guess this was a hijack. Pardon me. I was carried away by my Starbucks pet peeves. CARRY ON. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2003, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/25 "2003-03-17T21:08:32Z")
This is why I get my morning caffeine fix at a specialty coffee joint. I walk in (generally dazed and confused) and one of the two “baristas” who has been working there forever (I mean, they KNOW when you’ve changed your hairstyle for pete sake!!!) says “Sludge 3 shots”? I nod and smile stupidly and hand her my punch card. I have never figured out the whole “Tall, or Grande” thing, so if coherent, I say medium, if I have to, but they generally know. On another note, not all customers are snotty/mean, when baristas make mistakes. One of the girls at “my” coffee shop consistantly makes it a large instead of a medium, which everyone finds kindof funny, it’s like a mental block, because as soon as she does it, she gets this look and goes “Oh, no, that’s a 16 oz, not a 20, why do I do that”? And I just say “ach, that’s okay” and tip them anyway. ---
**Author:** ![dietrologia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4491bb/32.png) [@dietrologia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dietrologia)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2003, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/26 "2003-03-17T21:22:13Z")
Only on Planet Cuckoo does one “build” oneself a cup of coffee in the morning. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2003, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/27 "2003-03-17T21:37:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by kung fu lola \* > \*\ ***jjimm** , the men who don’t flush the frigging urinals in the men’s room at Tim Horton’s have orange piss. Maybe they’re eating too much broccoli. Or they just drink too much beer. Or both. \*\* Sounds like they’re dehydrated - or maybe they don’t drink _enough_ beer, or something. I ain’t never seen _orange_ piss on the floor of a Dublin pub. Eeeugh. ---
**Author:** ![kung\_fu\_lola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f4b2a3/32.png) [@kung\_fu\_lola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kung_fu_lola)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/28 "2003-03-18T00:42:47Z")
Interestingly, **jjimm** , eliminating vitamin B makes your pee darker. Metabolizing alcohol uses up vitamin B. Hence, the beer comment. And a hearty GRRRRRRRR, and other disgruntled noises, to **alice** and **dietrologia**. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/29 "2003-03-18T01:05:01Z")
Who drinks 20 ounces of coffee at one sitting?? Me, I’ll never ever get the hang of the shots and the grandes and all those other things. To me it’s forever a binary choice: a cup or a _pocillo_ (demitasse), black or _con leche_, sweetened or not, sugar or aspartame; maybe an espresso, which will be a demitasse, unmixed with anything else, sugar on the side. But, yeah, if the stuff is made a-la-carte you should specify what you want, or take what you’re given. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/30 "2003-03-18T01:10:21Z")
Wait a minute. Are you **daring** to tell me that a place selling Baked Goods does not have 10,000 immediately salable examples of every single product it produces on hand at any given moment? _Shocked! Shocked I say!_ (Warning: Post may contain some Sarcasm.) ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/31 "2003-03-18T01:54:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jjimm \* > \*\*I ain’t never seen _orange_ piss on the floor of a Dublin pub. Eeeugh. \*\* Well, I would hope not! Erin go bragh, BTW! ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/32 "2003-03-18T11:55:04Z")
WHO THE HELL IS EMMA?!?!?!?! ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 11:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/33 "2003-03-18T11:56:53Z")
Scroll up: Emma is **kung fu lola**. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 12:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908/34 "2003-03-18T12:01:43Z")
Well you see, if someone would have just pointed that out to me sooner, I wouldn’t have had to make this scene. Sheesh. You expect me to _read_ an entire thread, like I don’t have the attention span of a ferret on crack? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/us-low-end-baristas-cant-read-your-fucking-minds-mild-and-pointless/161908.md?page=1)