# USA can bite my Scottish ass (Spoiler?) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 30, 2001, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952 "2001-05-30T03:07:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/1 "2001-05-30T03:07:02Z")
Just saw what USA calls the end of Braveheart. Cut to credits after the first volley of archers from the fargin’ Brits (no offense to present day English)? Not bare assed mooning? No death on the rack whilst proclaiming the Scot Freedom? Who the fuck whitewashed THIS movie? They left TONS on the cutting room floor, the meat of the movie, the guts of the heroism, the ass of a thousand Highlanders (an one Mick). I express my outrage at those bungholes who PC’ed that great movie to Disney-like bullshit. That is my opinion, anyway, anyone else feel cheated by this travesty of television? I am a Douglas. Fear my wrath. ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/2 "2001-05-30T04:20:52Z")
Methinks they’re showing it in two parts. Part 2 is tomorrow (Wed. 5-30) at 9pm ET/8pm Central. ---
**Author:** ![Spiritus\_Mundi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Spiritus\_Mundi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiritus_Mundi)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/3 "2001-05-30T05:07:06Z")
Sit your Scottish ass down. Put your Scottish whiskey down. Pick up your TV guide. Stare at tomorows listings until words become intelligible. Laugh, retrieve whiskey, drink to posts which cannot be retrieved. ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/4 "2001-05-30T13:18:31Z")
Bill, Relax, play 18 holes and cleave the Sassenach tonight. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/5 "2001-05-30T14:19:11Z")
I don’t get the newspaper, and don’t read TV Guide, and it woulda been nice of those bastages to say “stay tuned for scenes from tomorrow’s conclusion”, or “to be continued”. Even though I’m wrong, I remain indignant. Harumpf. Mebbe need to get meself back home from me pub tonight in time for the next chapter. ---
**Author:** ![Doubleclick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Doubleclick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doubleclick)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/6 "2001-05-30T22:33:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UncleBill \* > \*\*I don’t get the newspaper, and don’t read TV Guide, and it woulda been nice of those bastages to say “stay tuned for scenes from tomorrow’s conclusion”, or “to be continued”. > > Even though I’m wrong, I remain indignant. > > Harumpf. > > Mebbe need to get meself back home from me pub tonight in time for the next chapter. \*\* Don’t tell me you didn’t know how it ends…and you call yourself a Scot. 😃 \ ---
**Author:** ![TheLoadedDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@TheLoadedDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLoadedDog)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/7 "2001-05-31T00:59:46Z")
Shouldn’t it be "bite my Scottish **arse**? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/8 "2001-05-31T01:03:40Z")
AHA HAHAHAHA…stupid Scots bastid! WEEE invented the kilt, ye know? Stupid sheep fuggers! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/9 "2001-05-31T02:34:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > \*\*AHA HAHAHAHA…stupid Scots bastid! > > WEEE invented the kilt, ye know? Stupid sheep fuggers! > > 😃 \*\* Ahh, ye Irish lassie, perhaps the Gaelic interferes with yer English! I said “Scottish”, I am not a Scot, I am Irish, yet not an “Irishman”. I am from Douglas (Scotland), Deegan (Ireland), Murray (Ireland), and Donnelly (Ireland). I meself am American, Hawaiian, if you want to be specific. I am 25% Scot, 75% Irish. I’d kick yer arse (if you were a man) and have a pint at the same time! I am a Douglas, a Murray, a Deegan, and a Donnelly. [sub]and what’s wrong with buggerin’ sheep, I’ll ask ya?[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/10 "2001-05-31T03:02:16Z")
[sub]and what’s wrong with buggerin’ sheep, I’ll ask ya?[/sub] \*\* [/QUOTE] So many jokes…So little time. ---
**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 7:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/11 "2001-05-31T07:58:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UncleBill \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > > \*\*AHA HAHAHAHA…stupid Scots bastid! > > > > WEEE invented the kilt, ye know? Stupid sheep fuggers! > > > > 😃 \*\* > > Ahh, ye Irish lassie, perhaps the Gaelic interferes with yer English! I said “Scottish”, I am not a Scot, I am Irish, yet not an “Irishman”. I am from Douglas (Scotland), Deegan (Ireland), Murray (Ireland), and Donnelly (Ireland). I meself am American, Hawaiian, if you want to be specific. I am 25% Scot, 75% Irish. I’d kick yer arse (if you were a man) and have a pint at the same time! I am a Douglas, a Murray, a Deegan, and a Donnelly. > > [sub]and what’s wrong with buggerin’ sheep, I’ll ask ya?[/sub] \*\* Surely you’re 100% American, if that’s where you were born? I mean, I could claim to be 50% Scottish, 25% Irish and 25% English if I wanted to, but since I was born in England it’s a bit far-fetched. ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 9:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/12 "2001-05-31T09:42:01Z")
> [@](#): > > I could claim to be 50% Scottish, 25% Irish and 25% English if I wanted to, but since I was born in England it’s a bit far-fetched. I dunno Mattk, Its worked for our footballers for years 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/13 "2001-05-31T10:01:19Z")
Ah…the Andy Townsend Defence…fair play, **Twist**! ---
**Author:** ![dlb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@dlb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dlb)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/14 "2001-05-31T12:29:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UncleBill \* > and what’s wrong with buggerin’ sheep, I’ll ask ya? I wouldn’t know. I don’t have your extensive sexual experience. I’m told, however, that they don’t run away as fast if you stick their hind legs in your boots. ---
**Author:** ![dlb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@dlb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dlb)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/15 "2001-05-31T12:29:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UncleBill \* > and what’s wrong with buggerin’ sheep, I’ll ask ya? I wouldn’t know. I don’t have your extensive sexual experience. I’m told, however, that they don’t run away as fast if you stick their hind legs in your boots. ---
**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/16 "2001-05-31T22:34:20Z")
dlb, hard to believe information like that (boots) can be learned any way but first hand! UncleBill to Sheep Du Jour: You’ve bred with dlb, now breed with me! sili whose first language was Russian - Russians roll their "r"s as well as Scotts, but they don’t know nearly as much about sheep. ---
**Author:** ![robgruver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@robgruver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robgruver)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/17 "2001-05-31T23:01:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UncleBill \* > \*\*Even though I’m wrong, I remain indignant. > \*\* Typical Scot. ::D&R:: ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2001, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/18 "2001-05-31T23:01:25Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by tradesilicon \* > \*\* UncleBill to Sheep Du Jour: > You’ve bred with dlb, now breed with me!_\* I don’t recall ever breeding with **dlb** , or with any male, but if I did, I hope I was good! And as for **sili** if you be a lassie from the Mother Russia, or for that matter a lassie from ANYWHERE, I’d love to roll my R’s against your R’s (or your arse!) ---
**Author:** ![Celyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@Celyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Celyn)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2001, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/19 "2001-06-01T00:40:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Spiritus Mundi \* > \*\*Sit your Scottish ass down. > Put your Scottish whiskey down. > Pick up your TV guide… > \*\* And now for some Scottish pedantry: it is **whisky** dammit!! ---
**Author:** ![ruadh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d2c977/32.png) [@ruadh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ruadh)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2001, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952/20 "2001-06-01T06:57:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mattk \* > \*\*Surely you’re 100% American, if that’s where you were born? I mean, I could claim to be 50% Scottish, 25% Irish and 25% English if I wanted to, but since I was born in England it’s a bit far-fetched. \*\* Interestingly enough, I read a newspaper article yesterday about the British elections which mentioned that there would be a number of “Irish and British-born Irish” voting in them. That’s the first time I’ve seen that usage over here that involved white people (it’s quite common, of course, to hear “Pakistanis” referred to as such even if they were born in Britain). Hey Twisty, when I get my passport, do I get to call myself “Irish”? 😉 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/usa-can-bite-my-scottish-ass-spoiler/66952.md?page=2)