# Use a sock puppet? That's an instaban. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 19, 2018, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715 "2018-04-19T16:23:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/1 "2018-04-19T16:23:10Z")
So, are you in the National Guard, have changed your mind, and are looking for an out? [Try wearing a dinosaur hand puppet while taking an oath for a quick career ender](https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/checkpoint/wp/2018/04/18/she-wore-a-dinosaur-puppet-during-a-military-oath-it-got-her-and-a-colonel-removed-from-the-job/?utm_term=.300143a60a86). ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/2 "2018-04-19T16:56:42Z")
It doesn’t say what day this happened but last Friday was Prehistoric Creatures Day. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/3 "2018-04-19T16:57:43Z")
I saw that article. Bunch of morons all around. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/4 "2018-04-19T17:01:52Z")
There are few things I have ever been solemn about. The military oath found me very quiet and introspective, though. You’re part of an incredibly powerful and destructive force, continuing to remain so is worth thinking hard about from time to time. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/5 "2018-04-19T17:46:58Z")
“Are you allowed to eat jelly donuts, Private Lamb Chop?” “SIR, NO SIR!” “And why not, Private Lamb Chop?” “Sir, because my mouth is sewn shut and I lack an alimentary canal, sir!” ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/6 "2018-04-19T20:21:49Z")
In case they ever draft old, fat guys, I’ll break out this guy: > **[Crocodile Puppet - Bing](https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=BqssJdBZ&id=49FC24E2762844440880B2D84FAB2873302D5C3E&thid=OIP.BqssJdBZswzkb2ks28UBHgHaHa&mediaurl=http%3a%2f%2fwestmusic.cachefly.net%2fgetDynamicImage.aspx%3fw%3d800%26h%3d800%26b%3d00ffffff%26path%3dAurora-32024-Glade-Alligator-Puppet.jpg&exph=800&expw=800&q=Crocodile%2BPuppet&simid=608012262924422569&selectedIndex=14&ajaxhist=0)** > > Intelligent search from Bing makes it easier to quickly find what you’re looking for and rewards you. \*Croc-a-Gator. \* My kid’s childhood buddy. Still got him around, somewhere. ---
**Author:** ![DinoR](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dinor/32/2821_2.png) [@DinoR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DinoR)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/7 "2018-04-19T21:46:35Z")
There’s a better way to get out when your enlistment is coming to an end. Don’t reenlist. She didn’t also get kicked out. She lost her full-time position with the Guard. That whole one weekend a month, two weeks a year, and whenever the Governor or President activates her still applies unless they follow on by kicking her out. She presumably signed the paperwork so it applies longer than it did when the video was filmed. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/8 "2018-04-19T22:18:01Z")
Does “defend against all enemies, foreign and domestic” include Velociraptors? ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/9 "2018-04-19T23:02:22Z")
looks more like a velcroraptor ---
**Author:** ![Maserschmidt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/maserschmidt/32/18829_2.png) [@Maserschmidt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maserschmidt)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/10 "2018-04-19T23:22:09Z")
This is an excellent thread title. ---
**Author:** ![bobkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c67d28/32.png) [@bobkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobkitty)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/11 "2018-04-20T00:24:52Z")
> [@DinoR](#): > > She didn’t also get kicked out. She lost her full-time position with the Guard. The Colonel _did_ get kicked out, though. Demoted and retired effective immediately. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/12 "2018-04-20T01:08:28Z")
Stole the idea from an old MASH ep. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/13 "2018-04-20T01:37:33Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > looks more like a velcroraptor Bravo!😃 ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/14 "2018-04-20T17:25:54Z")
It’s worth noting these were the most senior leaders of the unit. The colonel, his First Sergeant, and senior NCO. very surprising. My dad’s last assignment was First Sergeant. I regret not asking him more about it. Embarrassing the service with public stunts is never a good idea. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/15 "2018-04-20T17:32:59Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > looks more like a velcroraptor Well done. ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/16 "2018-04-20T17:39:53Z")
In the whole disturbing panoply of “career limiting moves” I witnessed in my life-long military career, that is one I never saw or imagined I ever would. In the parlance, WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT OVER ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/17 "2018-04-20T17:44:27Z")
I was talking about this with a friend, and she mentioned re-enlistment ceremonies that were done while scuba diving, sky diving, and on horse back. So I guess it’s not all THAT out of the reach of the sane. ---
**Author:** ![ZonexandScout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zonexandscout/32/544_2.png) [@ZonexandScout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZonexandScout)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/18 "2018-04-20T17:58:58Z")
My first reaction is, “How do we end up with someone who has a job in public affairs not knowing that this would be a bad idea?” I mean, I can understand that an engine mechanic might think it’s a funny thing to do, but a Joint Public Affairs officer? OTOH, I’ve noticed that a lot of journalists can’t write, a lot of academicians can’t seem to do honest research, a lot of Christian ministers can’t teach love and acceptance, etc., so I guess she’s got company. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/19 "2018-04-20T18:05:32Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > I was talking about this with a friend, and she mentioned re-enlistment ceremonies that were done while scuba diving, sky diving, and on horse back. So I guess it’s not all THAT out of the reach of the sane. Those seem to me to be odd but not necessarily disrespectful. I do wonder, however, how you recite the oath while scuba-diving. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715/20 "2018-04-20T18:10:00Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > Those seem to me to be odd but not necessarily disrespectful. I do wonder, however, how you recite the oath while scuba-diving. I asked the same exact question. She said they held up cards. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/use-a-sock-puppet-thats-an-instaban/812715.md?page=2)