# Useless crap that you want. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 12, 2002, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608 "2002-05-12T07:46:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![njufoic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/278dde/32.png) [@njufoic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njufoic)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/21 "2002-05-12T17:43:19Z")
I want to put a police scanner in my car, complete with the big aerial on the roof. In fact, I may do that this summer. -Andrew L ---
**Author:** ![kitarak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/898d66/32.png) [@kitarak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kitarak)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/22 "2002-05-12T18:03:02Z")
A lightmill. No good reason, they just look cool. šŸ™‚ And they have some neat and rather subtle physics behind them. ---
**Author:** ![scr4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/23 "2002-05-12T18:26:48Z")
Whatā€™s a lightmill? Is that the same as a [radiometer](http://www.scientificsonline.com/Products/DisplayProduct.cfm?productid=1484)? I really want a Van de Graff generator. And that device which has two wires sticking up, and a discharge arc travels up between the wires. (What do you call those anyway?) ---
**Author:** ![Dragonblink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Dragonblink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragonblink)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/24 "2002-05-12T18:30:06Z")
I want one of [these](http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/fun-stuff/5991.shtml) so bad it hurts. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/25 "2002-05-12T19:20:11Z")
I want a dollhouse. An historic Brooklyn brownstone replica with a gaslight in fromt and a carriage house and tin ceilings and miniture tiffany fixtures and tiny antique furniture. And a green laser pointer. ---
**Author:** ![Francesca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@Francesca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Francesca)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/26 "2002-05-12T19:39:33Z")
I want a t-shirt that says ā€œI donā€™t believe in your magical sky pixieā€. But I donā€™t want a laser pointer. Is that so wrong? ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/27 "2002-05-12T19:42:38Z")
I am on a run of indulging myself in some not-exactly-necessary purchases. My latest, yesterday- a Dolby Surround Theater in a box. Some day soon, if the day arrives when I can watch the Simpsons on HDTV, I will want an HDTV. I actually want one now, but even _I_ canā€™t manage to justify it to myself, since thereā€™s not a sinlgle program that I want broadcast in HDTV. I take all my high-tech purchasing cues from Homer. If he wants it, I have it!šŸ˜› (Except for the mobile home) ---
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/28 "2002-05-12T19:50:18Z")
I want two things: (1) a pet TOUCAN bird-they are beautiful, but I understand they are not happy in captivity-owning a bird that isnā€™t happy would make me unhappy (2) a solid 18KT gold ROLEX watch-anybody have one of these-are they comfotable to wear? ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/29 "2002-05-12T19:55:44Z")
Thereā€™s this thing they advertise on late night TV, which is an attachment for your garden hose that you can use to blast leaves out of your gutters with super-strong stream of water. We donā€™t even _have_ gutters, or a garden hose, but I want this anyway. It just looks so neat. ---
**Author:** ![MagicalSilverKey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@MagicalSilverKey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MagicalSilverKey)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/30 "2002-05-12T20:06:31Z")
Iā€™ve always wanted a soda vending machine ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/31 "2002-05-12T20:07:42Z")
Nice rims for my Passat. Tasteful, not flashy or ā€œghetto.ā€ A GeForce 4 video card. Lutron remote control light dimmers. A green laser pointer. A heated towel rack. A Sirius satelite radio receiver. A moster dick so enormous, women will faint at its sight. An old Western Electric dial telephone. ---
**Author:** ![Dagny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9f8e36/32.png) [@Dagny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dagny)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/32 "2002-05-12T20:11:42Z")
Becuase what I really need in life is more makeup and perfume. Chanel eye shadow in Sphinx Chanel bronzer powder in Mirage Bobbi Brown Gel Eyeliner in Sepia Guerlain Nahema perfume Guerlain Mahora perfume Maybelline Moisturewhip Lipstick in Hot Hot Hot That fridge does look pretty darn cool. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/33 "2002-05-12T20:15:38Z")
Oh ā€¦ and one of those Russian wrist watches, too. ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/34 "2002-05-12T20:25:05Z")
I want a hamburger, no a cheeseburger. I want a hot dog. I want a milkshake. I want potato chips. I want an apartment in Knoxville. I want a green laser pointer. I want a George Foreman Grill thing, even though Iā€™d never use it. And I want a gameboy advance even though I havenā€™t seen any games for it that I want. ooh, and a new vacuum cleaner. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/35 "2002-05-12T20:25:12Z")
I have so much useless stuff right now, I have to make myself stop buying every little thing that catches my fancy. But, I really really want a green laser pointer. And not just that, I also want one of those turbo-jet lighters that shoots a green flame. And I donā€™t even smoke! ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/36 "2002-05-12T20:29:03Z")
This remote control. And this paddle game. Just the remote control and and paddle game, and thatā€™s all I want. And this chair . . . ---
**Author:** ![Francesca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@Francesca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Francesca)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/37 "2002-05-12T20:31:17Z")
I forgot: I have only ever seen one informercial in my life. Being green to the ways of informercials I was caught off-guard and with my defenses down. I now have a lifelong desire for a cooking thing that keeps cooking for hours even when you take it off the hob. ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_Ice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f1d935/32.png) [@Lady\_Ice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_Ice)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/38 "2002-05-12T20:56:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by GuanoLad \* > \*\*A light sabre. > > [The type that really works](http://www.lightsaberreplicas.com/VadRRlarge.html) \*\* I was just wondering earlier today if they actually made these. Now I REALLY want one. Eighteen hundred bucks? Crap.ā˜¹ I guess Iā€™ll have to settle for the green laser pointer. ---
**Author:** ![Mac\_Guffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Mac\_Guffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mac_Guffin)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/39 "2002-05-12T22:24:23Z")
[Homer] Mmmmā€¦ Green laser pointer![/Homer] Want me one oā€™ them. And a blue one too. They say you can put a visible spot on low clouds with a green pointer. I have plenty of red ones. And I built my own working lightsaber outta plumbing tubing, lexan tubing and Electroluminecent wire. But I broke it dueling. Poop. I geek therefore I am. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608/40 "2002-05-12T22:28:20Z")
A winning ticket to a 50 million lottery. Norm Abramsā€™ workshop in my backyard. A green laser pointer. I have a red one. A decent bottled ice tea that is not too sweet and NO LEMON!!! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/useless-crap-that-you-want/108608.md?page=3)