# Vagina Boiling & You \*internal screaming\* **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 27, 2019, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327 "2019-08-27T19:07:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/1 "2019-08-27T19:07:11Z")
So I was in a small New Age-y shop today, buying a stone figurine that I’d seen in the window. The whole place stank of [del]burning junk[/del] cheap incense, there were posters on the walls about psychic pain relief and aura colors and whatnot, and the lady asked my if I wanted to know the properties of the stone I was buying. (“Its properties are ‘hard’ and ‘light brown’,” thought I, too polite to say this out loud). As she bagged the crudely-carved kitty, she slipped a few flyers in as well. When I got home, I decided I’d read them for a laff. Yeah, about what I’d figured they’d be. Protection from “electromagnetic forces”, reiki healing 101, two copies of the same ad for yoni steaming– _record scratch_ _Yoni steaming_? Not-- they didn’t mean-- _please let them be talking about the diminutive form of ‘Yonatan’ somehow? Or some other meaning of ‘steaming’?_ I spent several seconds frozen in horror before I was able to make myself read the rest of it. > [@](#): > > Yoni Steaming is an ancient and natural practice where you, the client, detoxes your womb by sitting atop of boiling herbs. NO. > [@](#): > > This method of detoxing can help regulate your menstrual cycle after one session. NOPE. > [@](#): > > Curious to see how yoni steams can benefit you? See our reasons to yoni Steam on the back! I will never, _ever_ be that curious. NEVER. Also my yoni has curled up and retracted into my uterus, and shows no signs of ever wanting to come back. I know the New Age crowd is into all sorts of cruel and unusual “health” routines, but… GAH! Why? What sort of thought process do you need to have to decide, “Today I’m going to cook my hooha, and pay for the privilege”? Won’t someone think of the vaginas?!? ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/2 "2019-08-27T19:12:27Z")
It’s been a fad lately. I know Chrissy Teigen was on TMZ or People doing it. ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/3 "2019-08-27T19:15:24Z")
Hey, I could get this done locally. [https://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=yoni+steam+sacramento+ca&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8](https://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=yoni+steam+sacramento+ca&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8) Appropriately named “The Honey Throne.” ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/4 "2019-08-27T19:15:45Z")
Gwyneth Paltrow is famously a proponent of it. I think she wrote about it in her unfortunately named newsletter . . . _ **GOOP** _ ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/5 "2019-08-27T19:27:12Z")
I knew someone, and I say KNEW someone for 9 months. Her cycle was exactly synced to the full moon, each and every time. She claims it has always been so. I can just tell from the blood and her stating it for me to realize it. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/6 "2019-08-27T19:29:26Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > I knew someone, and I say KNEW someone for 9 months. Her cycle was exactly synced to the full moon, each and every time. She claims it has always been so. I can just tell from the blood and her stating it for me to realize it. So many questions…that I am wise enough not to ask. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_McQwark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4da419/32.png) [@Steve\_McQwark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_McQwark)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/7 "2019-08-27T19:33:48Z")
Several years ago I saw Joanna Lumley talking about this on tv. I thought it was on the Graham Norton show, but Google is claiming no knowledge of such an episode. Apparently she did a show in 2010 called “Joanna Lumley’s Nile” and when she was in Sudan she participated in a ceremony called “Dukahn.” Very similar to what you described, just with old-agey instead of new-agey inspiration. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/8 "2019-08-27T19:36:58Z")
More advantages to menopause. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/9 "2019-08-27T19:43:38Z")
It certainly gives “carpet steamer” new meaning. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/10 "2019-08-27T19:44:05Z")
Seems like too much steam would wrinkle it. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/11 "2019-08-27T19:48:09Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > Seems like too much steam would wrinkle it. Sure steams that way. ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/12 "2019-08-27T19:53:15Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > Gwyneth Paltrow is famously a proponent of it. I think she wrote about it in her unfortunately named newsletter . . . _ **GOOP** _ I knew clicking on this thread while I was eating would be a mistake. ---
**Author:** ![steatopygia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steatopygia/32/3132_2.png) [@steatopygia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steatopygia)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/13 "2019-08-27T20:00:26Z")
Excellent OP! ---
**Author:** ![DPRK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4491bb/32.png) [@DPRK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DPRK)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/14 "2019-08-27T20:02:11Z")
If you are truly hard-core, you are not going to sit near no boiling herbs. You go to a _real_ [sauna](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sauna) where the air temperature exceeds 100 °C. Don’t forget to roll around naked in the snow afterwards! ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/15 "2019-08-27T20:02:33Z")
I really hope that my uterus is not that accessible to steam, so as to be fully available when perched atop a pot of boiling herbs. And also…my period is hardly affected by Aleve. How can it possibly be affected by herb steam?! ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/16 "2019-08-27T21:03:17Z")
It’s definitely been in the news lately - but [not in a good way](https://www.bbc.com/news/health-49278279). ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/17 "2019-08-27T21:10:11Z")
But _which_ herbs? Basil? Catnip? Aloe Vera? ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/18 "2019-08-27T21:15:24Z")
> [@PatrickLondon](#): > > But _which_ herbs? Basil? Catnip? Aloe Vera? [Tarlek](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C5whXEjUsAAbdWD.jpg). 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/19 "2019-08-27T21:53:33Z")
You know, I’ve decided that if Gwyneth endorses it it’s probably a good thing to stay away from. ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327/20 "2019-08-27T21:58:43Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > I knew someone, and I say KNEW someone for 9 months. Her cycle was exactly synced to the full moon, each and every time. She claims it has always been so. I can just tell from the blood and her stating it for me to realize it. You may not believe this, but women have been known to lie about their periods. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vagina-boiling-you-internal-screaming/839327.md?page=2)