# Vegetarian dinner guests. Aaaaaaaaaaaah. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 3, 2007, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584 "2007-04-03T17:03:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/81 "2007-04-04T00:16:40Z")
Might wanna read past the thread title, **Rubystreak**. Just sayin’. I agree the title is a little on the provocative side, but none of the posters so far have expressed the sentiment you accuse them of. ---
**Author:** ![threnodyangelfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@threnodyangelfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/threnodyangelfire)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/82 "2007-04-04T00:23:02Z")
[QUOTE=villa] I do one that is equal parts olive oil, fresh lemon juice, fresh grated parmesan mixed together, then poured over the linguini and tossed with lemon zest. And fresh basil thrown in I think. [/QUOTE] Holy shit that sounds good. And to the OP - yeah she’s a bitch. I’ve been through some pretty strict vegetarian phases in my life and I would never dream of making acomment like that. Even at the height of my veganism, when I came to a dinner party I would always bring food with me - to share with all, naturally but it also meant that the host didn’t have to go to any trouble for me. I also used to volunteer to come and help cook, and that way could help with salads and stuff that was vege. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heffalump_and_roo/32/7691_2.png) [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heffalump_and_Roo)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/83 "2007-04-04T00:24:43Z")
[QUOTE=Rubystreak] Yeah, one asshole vegetarian is mean to the OP (on his birthday, no less, the bitch!) and now, it’s open season on vegetarians. Why is everyone so ready to flip shit about this topic? Most vegetarians are not like the jerk that was rude to the OP; I’d be so grateful if someone made a special entree just for me, and would considered it beyond the call of duty. Most people would. Regardless of this, at the slightest opportunity, all this barely-repressed hostility comes out towards non-meat eaters. What, do you feel all judged or something, so you’ve got to lash out when you get the chance? Why not focus your bile on the specific person behaving badly and not spew it on all vegetarians in general? There is more than ample evidence of an unreasonable prejudice here, which is uncalled for, because as someone else said, if the woman in the OP weren’t a vegetarian, she’s probably find something else to bitch about. [/QUOTE] Whew! Glad you wrote that. Better you than me. > [@Q.E.D.](#): > > I agree the title is a little on the provocative side, but none of the posters so far have expressed the sentiment you accuse them of. You and I are not reading the same stuff. . . or interpreting it the same way. ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/84 "2007-04-04T00:27:57Z")
[QUOTE=Heffalump and Roo] You and I are not reading the same stuff. . . or interpreting it the same way. [/QUOTE] I would guess the latter. Examples, please? ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/85 "2007-04-04T00:33:12Z")
[QUOTE=Rubystreak] Most vegetarians are not like the jerk that was rude to the OP; I’d be so grateful if someone made a special entree just for me, and would considered it beyond the call of duty. Most people would. [/QUOTE] I do believe that’s pretty much what _every single person_ in this thread has said, if not explicitly then implicitly. > [@mhendo](#): > > Good rant. Bad title. > > This is not about “Vegetarian dinner guests,” it’s about your one asshole friend. > [@bordelond](#): > > Another issue is that vegetarians like SanVito’s “friend” makes a lot of people forget about the vast majority of easy-going, accomodating vegetarians. The pushy, whiny ones become the “default” vegetarians in too many people’s minds. > [@pulykamell](#): > > Yeah, your friend’s problem is not being vegetarian, it’s being a self-centered, rude asshole. > [@Cairo Carol](#): > > She’s a bitch pure and simple. > > For the record, none of the vegetarians I know would dream of behaving that way. > [@tdn](#): > > That’s true, but upon reading the title, I knew exactly what the contents inside would be. (in response to mhendo’s quote) And so on and so forth. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/86 "2007-04-04T01:00:23Z")
[QUOTE=Rubystreak] Yeah, one asshole vegetarian is mean to the OP (on his birthday, no less, the bitch!) and now, it’s open season on vegetarians. Why is everyone so ready to flip shit about this topic? Most vegetarians are not like the jerk that was rude to the OP; I’d be so grateful if someone made a special entree just for me, and would considered it beyond the call of duty. Most people would. Regardless of this, at the slightest opportunity, all this barely-repressed hostility comes out towards non-meat eaters. What, do you feel all judged or something, so you’ve got to lash out when you get the chance? Why not focus your bile on the specific person behaving badly and not spew it on all vegetarians in general? There is more than ample evidence of an unreasonable prejudice here, which is uncalled for, because as someone else said, if the woman in the OP weren’t a vegetarian, she’s probably find something else to bitch about. [/QUOTE] You can add me to the list. I think you flew way over the handle here! This thread was remarkably well-mannered. Are you \*trying \*to cause a fight? ---
**Author:** ![capybara](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/capybara/32/202_2.png) [@capybara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/capybara)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/87 "2007-04-04T01:27:23Z")
(Are “we” being whooshed? Rubystreak posts just after several people have noted the unpittiness of the thread. . . (re: Wring, Levdrakon. . . ) Perhaps it needs more irony-fortified?) ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/88 "2007-04-04T03:02:04Z")
[QUOTE=Anaamika] You can add me to the list. I think you flew way over the handle here! This thread was remarkably well-mannered. Are you \*trying \*to cause a fight? [/QUOTE] C’mon, you’re enjoying this thread more now because it’s more Pittish, ain’t ya? No need to thank me. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/89 "2007-04-04T03:09:27Z")
For some reason I always read your username as Rubysteak. Why _are_ you sticking up for those lettuce eaters, you cow muncher? :dubious: _ **MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!** _ ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/90 "2007-04-04T03:16:27Z")
[QUOTE=Rubystreak] C’mon, you’re enjoying this thread more now because it’s more Pittish, ain’t ya? No need to thank me. 😉 [/QUOTE] I was kind of wondering! Well, I’ll refrain from thank-yous and just say - Vegetarian creme brulee is goooooooooooooooooooooooooood! ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/91 "2007-04-04T04:16:41Z")
The correct response to this carping is, with a sincere smile on your face, and loudly so all can hear; “I gave it my best effort, I’m so very sorry it’s has proven not enough for you.” Don’t pause even a second for a response, smile broadly and move directly into a cheery conversation with whomever is standing closest to you, sort of, “Oh don’t you love this song, weather, that dress, so and so’s new hair cut.” You will come off as elegant and well mannered and she will be revealed for the ungrateful boor that she is, and I’d bet money she will never behave in this particularly ungrateful fashion again. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/92 "2007-04-04T04:21:22Z")
[QUOTE=Anaamika] **Kalhoun** , you suck. Now I want creme bruleee. Mmm, creme brulee’d vegetarian. [/QUOTE] There actually was an apocryphal story going around about 15 years ago, in the “oops! not quite what they meant” category of factoids that get circulated, of an Albany restaurant whose menu supposedly included Cream of Vegetarian Soup. ---
**Author:** ![Do\_Not\_Taunt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/do_not_taunt/32/2968_2.png) [@Do\_Not\_Taunt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Do_Not_Taunt)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/93 "2007-04-04T05:01:25Z")
Okay, I’ll be the (to a degree) serious dissenting opinion here. However, to be clear, I don’t condone being mean to dinner party hosts on their birthdays, and I think the lemon spaghetti sounds pretty damn good. And I agree that the friend in the OP was being an ungrateful jerk. However. I imagine if I’m throwing a dinner party, and making, say, a delightful little shrimp jumbalaya, and inviting twelve of my closest friends, I’d invite John, who’s allergic to shellfish. But naturally, I remember this fact about John, so I know I need to make something else without shrimp. Do I (a) whip up an eggplant parmesan and hope that the one guest I’m specifically making this for likes it and pat myself on the back for being a good host or (b) call John and the damn phone and say, “Dude, I’m making shrimp. What do you want instead?” I guarantee you the answer’s b, and I believe this is the correct way to handle this situation. And honestly - I think inviting friends to a dinner party and **not** considering their dietary restrictions makes you a shitty host. By considering their restrictions, you don’t become any better of a host than you already are by having the dinner party in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/94 "2007-04-04T06:03:56Z")
[QUOTE=Do Not Taunt] I guarantee you the answer’s b, and I believe this is the correct way to handle this situation. [/QUOTE] Why? Do you ask the other guests exactly what they want to eat? I mean, there’s nothing wrong with calling up your vegetarian friend and asking what he or she wants to eat–that’s a perfectly reasonable idea, however I disagree that this is **the** correct way to handle the situation. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/95 "2007-04-04T07:18:36Z")
[QUOTE=Alma] How strict a vegetarian is your contemporary? Most wine and a lot of cheeses are actually [not vegetarian](http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/vegetarian_and_vegan/entertaining.shtml). [/QUOTE] … why would fermented grape juice not be vegetarian? What’s next, non-vegan grapes? ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/96 "2007-04-04T07:26:22Z")
[QUOTE=Nava] … why would fermented grape juice not be vegetarian? What’s next, non-vegan grapes? [/QUOTE] I would assume that has nothing to do with grapes but rather refers to wine that is fined with isinglass (a product made from fish). It’s also used in beermaking–I’ve used it in some of my homebrews, although lately I refrain from fining the beer and letting any particles clouding up my beer naturally settle to the bottom. A similar issue with cheese. Most cheese is made with natural rennet, an animal product. It wouldn’t matter for vegans anyway (who don’t eat any sort of cheese), but ovo-lacto vegetarians would also be prohibited from eating cheese made with natural rennet. ---
**Author:** ![Uzi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/91b2a8/32.png) [@Uzi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uzi)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/97 "2007-04-04T08:24:00Z")
[QUOTE=Swallowed My Cellphone] Can I have your lemon spaghetti recipe? [/QUOTE] [QUOTE=villa] I do one that is **equal parts** olive oil, fresh lemon juice, fresh grated parmesan mixed together, then poured over the linguini and tossed with lemon zest. And fresh basil thrown in I think. I usually serve it with chicken and prosciutto sauteed in lemon & garlic. [/QUOTE] Sounds excellent, but I think it would be lost on my family. When I buy fresh lemons my wife always says we have lemon juice in the fridge and pulls out a green bottle with the picture of a lemon on it.:dubious: :rolleyes: If I’m inviting people over I always tell them what we are having that way they can object beforehand. Me: We’re having Vietnamese with peanut sauce and then we’ll.. Guest: I’m allergic to peanuts. M: Oh,..So should I get some epinephrine, or will you supply your own? G: Uh, I think I have something else to do on that day. M: Well, of course, you know best, FREAK!\* It is amazing I still have parties let alone friends! 😃 \*Actually, I would change the menu once I knew that. But if I’m cooking ribs and you are a vegetarian, then you’re probably not going to fit in anyways. ---
**Author:** ![SanVito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sanvito/32/2805_2.png) [@SanVito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanVito)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 9:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/98 "2007-04-04T09:56:19Z")
Hello all, sorry I disappeared for a few hours, being in a different time zone and all. Thank you for your support and for those who tried to turn an argument against me. All pitters welcome. I don’t have any problem with vegetarians, wouldn’t invite them at all if I did, although I’ll be damned if I’m going to dictate an entire menu around one person’s personal preferences (and for her, it’s definately a preference - I’ve seen her happily throwing wine and cheese down her neck without a moment’s thought to vegetarian purity). Okay, this pit thread was more about her than her vegetarianism. I guess her vegetarianism gets on my wick because it’s yet another example of how she likes to go around making herself sound special. I’ve recently decided enough is enough after: 1. She sent me a long email rant accusing me of being jealous of her good looks and ability to attract men after I dared suggest that picking up drunk strangers on trains, something that’s becoming a bit of a habit, was perhaps not the best way to find a nice, ‘safe’ relationship. (Err, well I’m a lesbian so I don’t see how I’d be jealous of that). 2. I invited her out to Sunday lunch with my cousins who were staying with me. When I phoned her asking where she was, she said she was just on her way to the gym and could we change it to an evening do instead (we were already in the restaurant). When I pointed out to her that, no, we were already there and I had to take my cousins to the airport in the evening, she said I was so selfish and slammed the phoen down on me. WTF??? Stuff her. Shove an apple in her mouth and stick her on a spit. Although I don’t think she’ll taste very nice. ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/99 "2007-04-04T10:10:32Z")
Don’t bother with the apple etc, she’ll taste bitter whatever you do. I’ve been a vegetarian for nearly 25 years and my friends all know me well enough to know that if I’m invited for dinner and they genuinely have no idea what to cook, I’ll happily bring my own. Sometimes it’s just so much easier than causing them the stress of providing something for one difficult person. Either that, or they just give me spaghetti with pesto which is more than acceptable. Your “friend” sounds like the kind of person you want to drop off the nearest tall building and never hear from again. Maybe next time she picks up a drunk stranger on a train, she’ll find out exactly why you shouldn’t do that kind of thing. At least you won’t have to invite her to dinner again. ---
**Author:** ![Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bites_when_provoked/32/18073_2.png) [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bites_When_Provoked)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 10:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584/100 "2007-04-04T10:38:36Z")
…but enough about that. How about that lemon spaghetti recipe? 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/vegetarian-dinner-guests-aaaaaaaaaaaah/398584.md?page=6)