# Velveeta **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 4, 2007, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755 "2007-06-04T21:10:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/21 "2007-06-05T07:03:28Z")
Velveeta is one of the things I miss. I used to drop chunks of it in a pot of Hormel chunky chili no beans and let it melt. Was really good. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/22 "2007-06-05T07:31:50Z")
We can’t get Velveeta over here. I could order it from eBay, but I don’t want to pay $40 for some shitty fake cheese by mail. But without it, you can’t make decent nacho cheese. UK nachos have solidified, rubbery melted cheddar on them, and they suck. American nachos are the best. The only place we can get nachos with good nacho cheese is at the movie theater. And we rarely have time to go. ---
**Author:** ![Common\_Tater](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/common_tater/32/13846_2.png) [@Common\_Tater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Common_Tater)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/23 "2007-06-05T10:00:50Z")
[QUOTE=Big Bad Voodoo Lou] You can’t make good chili con queso dip with a fine block of high-end cheddar cheese and gourmet chili that won the first prize at the chili cookoff. You need canned Hormel chili and Velveeta to get the consistency and flavor just right. Save the good cheese and chili for other meals! [/QUOTE] Hormel, to their undying shame and detriment, changed their Chili preparation some years ago. It’s just not the same. Velveeta is pretty good for a classic egg omelet, although I have tried making them with more expensive varieties. Gouda is nice, and pepper jack, but I enjoy Velveeta here. So sue me! I think baked omelets benefit from “real” cheeses, but for a quick frying pan omelet, Velveeta is hard to beat. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/24 "2007-06-05T11:33:22Z")
[QUOTE=Omegaman] I used to so enjoy it as a child. My sweet mother would put a slice on toast and cook it under the broiler until it turned a golden brown. The fond memories of childhood complete with taste and smell. [/QUOTE] We had that a lot during the lean days, and my mom put a piece of bacon on it, too. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/25 "2007-06-05T11:40:43Z")
When I was a lass, my mother never bought Velveeta or salami because it was _Poor People Food_ (or something). However, we always had a jar of Cheez Whiz in the frig. Go Figure. I adored it as a kid, enjoying it at all my friends and cousins houses with much envy. Now that I am a so-called adult, I usually have a brick of this stuff in my fridge ( along with salami) on permanent basis. Just to fill the hole of this gap in my youth. Is it just me or is **Velveeta** just one of the best product names evar? ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/26 "2007-06-05T11:45:00Z")
> [@](#): > > she is the only female ever inducted into a 500 year old secret French cheese guild This is so cool! You guys must be so constipated. A mystery book could be written about this, ala Davinci Code. Yanno. Cheesy Fiction.: _Cheeses of Nazareth_ or something. ---
**Author:** ![Merkwurdigliebe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/74df32/32.png) [@Merkwurdigliebe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merkwurdigliebe)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/27 "2007-06-05T11:59:02Z")
Velveta Shells and Cheese are probably the best mac and cheese type thing ever… ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/28 "2007-06-05T12:06:14Z")
I made the velvetta and hormel chili dish a couple years ago for the missus and I to enjoy during the StuporBowl. I (as usual) made way too much food, and the chili con queso was barely touched. After many, many hours sitting out, it congealed into a consistency somewhere between jello and injection-molded hard rubber. Halfway through spooning it into the sink the next morning, the garbage disposal said “I don’t think so” (really). ---
**Author:** ![Yeeter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/96bed5/32.png) [@Yeeter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeeter)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/29 "2007-06-05T12:24:02Z")
A friend of mine told me she wants to name her child “Velveeta.” She played it off as a joke at the time, but I wouldn’t be really surprised if she actually used it (maybe as a middle name or something). I emailed her the link to the fudge recipe, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/30 "2007-06-05T12:52:14Z")
Wasn’t there a band called **Velveeta Underground**? I know the Mockers had a song by that name… ---
**Author:** ![yellowval](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/919ad9/32.png) [@yellowval](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yellowval)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/31 "2007-06-05T12:55:03Z")
Velveeta is really the best for mac and cheese. It can’t be denied. And speaking of Cheez Whiz, is anyone else here a fan of Cheez Whiz and green olive sandwiches? Preferably open-faced on rye bread or those round cinnamon loaves (don’t knock it 'til you’ve tried it). Mmmmm … I could go for one right now. ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/32 "2007-06-05T13:12:11Z")
[QUOTE=NinetyWt] Plus, you can make [fudge](http://southernfood.about.com/od/fudgerecipes/r/bl30222c.htm)with Velveeta !! [/QUOTE] this is just plain _wrong_. Name that quote: “Did you get me my cheese whiz, boy?” hint: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPfHkw3snF4](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPfHkw3snF4) ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/33 "2007-06-05T13:17:16Z")
[QUOTE=cochrane] I like peanut butter-and-Velveeta sandwiches. With chunky peanut butter, o’ course. [/QUOTE] > [@yellowval](#): > > And speaking of Cheez Whiz, is anyone else here a fan of Cheez Whiz and green olive sandwiches? Preferably open-faced on rye bread or those round cinnamon loaves (don’t knock it 'til you’ve tried it). Mmmmm … I could go for one right now. These are two of the most _disgusting_ ideas for food I have seen in a long time. This means, of course, I cannot wait to try 'em. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![hotflungwok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/edb3f5/32.png) [@hotflungwok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hotflungwok)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/34 "2007-06-05T13:21:12Z")
Ugh, you people need help. Cheez whiz is not something you eat, it’s something you consult a urologist for. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/35 "2007-06-05T13:37:41Z")
[QUOTE=StuffLikeThatThere] I’m a pretty good cook, and I like making interesting dishes, but sometimes, if no one is around, I dump a bunch of Velveeta and a package of frozen spinach in a saucepan and heat it up till it’s all melty and pour it over pasta. When I eat it, I am as happy as when I was six and had only to worry about whether I would be allowed to go swimming the next day. [/QUOTE] That is _so_ going on my grocery list. I’ll buy the two pound brick, and save half for Ro-tel Dip dinner a week later. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/36 "2007-06-05T14:18:53Z")
[QUOTE=Common Tater] Hormel, to their undying shame and detriment, changed their Chili preparation some years ago. It’s just not the same. [/QUOTE] Use Wolf chili instead. Same great taste you remember. Or better yet, toss in a can of drained Ro-Tel as well. Dip of the gods! ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/37 "2007-06-05T14:19:33Z")
[QUOTE=hotflungwok] Ugh, you people need help. Cheez whiz is not something you eat, it’s something you consult a urologist for. [/QUOTE] No, that would be _vulveeta._ ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/38 "2007-06-05T14:20:58Z")
[QUOTE=China Guy] Name that quote: “Did you get me my cheese whiz, boy?” hint: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPfHkw3snF4](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPfHkw3snF4) [/QUOTE] Old man in lobby, to Elwood, in _The Blues Brothers_. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/39 "2007-06-05T15:33:28Z")
To support my theory that there is a song about every conceivable topic, I present the lyrics from the bridge of _Family Restaurant_, by Uncle Bonsai: _Velveeta It’s on everything that you can buy, it’s Velveeta It’s the Spam of the cheeses, it’s sure to appease, it’s Velveeta Just the name brings the tears to my eyes, it’s Velveeta It’s like cheese with a perfect disguise_ ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2007, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/40 "2007-06-05T19:12:58Z")
Velveeta is made from recycled plastic. The plastic-old rubber duckies. :o [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755.md?page=3)