# Velveeta **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 4, 2007, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755 "2007-06-04T21:10:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2007, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/81 "2007-06-06T20:56:23Z")
[QUOTE=pulykamell] Mayo? I don’t think I’ve ever heard of such a thing. So the mayo is on the outside of the bread while it fries? Huh… [/QUOTE] Yep, and it makes a really good crispy, buttery outside. But, you can’t use the low-fat version because it doesn’t cook properly. Oh, I almost forgot. Since this thread made me crave cheese food so much, I tried making a grilled cheese with butter last night. It was delicious, though it tasted about the same as one with mayo. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2007, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/82 "2007-06-06T21:20:28Z")
[QUOTE=Winston Smith] Just once, can we have a conversation about Velveeta without it turning ugly? Jeez. [/QUOTE] Any subject here can turn ugly. Will no one think of baby Cheeses? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2007, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/83 "2007-06-06T21:25:22Z")
OK. That’s **1**. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2007, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/84 "2007-06-06T22:00:35Z")
[QUOTE=freckafree] And it makes GREAT trout bait! [/QUOTE] Ooooh! Thank you for bringing back a buried childhood memory. My brother and I were fishing in a tiny stream, with little pieces of American cheese for bait. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2007, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/85 "2007-06-06T22:10:58Z")
[QUOTE=overlyverbose] Yep, and it makes a really good crispy, buttery outside. But, you can’t use the low-fat version because it doesn’t cook properly. Oh, I almost forgot. Since this thread made me crave cheese food so much, I tried making a grilled cheese with butter last night. It was delicious, though it tasted about the same as one with mayo. [/QUOTE] My friend makes his grilled cheese with butter inside the sandwich and outside! This was a revelation. Mmmm, grilled cheese with tomato and bacon. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2007, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/86 "2007-06-06T22:29:10Z")
[QUOTE=kittenblue] Cheese Spread 3 lb. block of Velveeta 1 small jar horseradish (I think it’s 4 oz…Woebber’s) Sherry…fill the empty horseradish jar and dump in 1 T Worchestershire sauce Mix all the ingredients together and let stand…I put it in the fridge for a few hours or overnight. Then process in food processor or in a mixer until smooth. Serve with crackers and breadsticks. [/QUOTE] I just made a batch of this. Wow! That’s good eatin’! Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2007, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/87 "2007-06-06T22:53:29Z")
[QUOTE=Shirley Ujest] Any subject here can turn ugly. Will no one think of baby Cheeses? [/QUOTE] I like to picture Cheeses as a ninja, fighting other ninjas. ---
**Author:** ![kittenblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ba8739/32.png) [@kittenblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenblue)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/88 "2007-06-07T03:14:58Z")
[QUOTE=silenus] I just made a batch of this. Wow! That’s good eatin’! Thanks. [/QUOTE] Glad you like it! Isn’t it amazing how the texture changes? And it’s so addictive, too. I’m so glad I don’t have any horseradish in the house right now, because there’s a block of Velveeta at the back of the fridge, calling to me…maybe if I drink up the last of the sherry it’ll shut up…though I do need to make something for the picnic tomorrow, and Giant Eagle is open 24 hours… ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/89 "2007-06-07T03:23:39Z")
I’m going to make another batch tomorrow and play with it a bit. My initial changes will be to swap bourbon for the sherry and add some pepper sauce to the mix. But you are so right…the texture is so unlike Velveeta I never would have guessed that was the base. ---
**Author:** ![BMax](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bmax/32/4267_2.png) [@BMax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMax)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/90 "2007-06-07T04:35:13Z")
[QUOTE=Qadgop the Mercotan] In my household, we take a block of Spam, a block of Velveeta, run them thru a meat grinder (food processors puree them too much if you’re not careful) then spread the resulting mix on bread and pop it in the toaster oven until it’s crispy and bubbly and heart-stoppingly delicious! 🆒 (Some folks add onions to the grinder, and/or other vegetables/spices. I don’t go for that, but to each their own) [/QUOTE] Gods, Now I am totally craving that. I knew I should have bought that meat grinder at the Salvation Army! ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/91 "2007-06-07T12:17:45Z")
[QUOTE=Shirley Ujest] A mystery book could be written about this, ala Davinci Code. Yanno. Cheesy Fiction.: _Cheeses of Nazareth_ or something. [/QUOTE] That would be The Davinci Curd. It’s about those who follow the whey of The Lord. ---
**Author:** ![velvetjones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5f9b8f/32.png) [@velvetjones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/velvetjones)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/92 "2007-06-07T14:15:33Z")
I don’t particularly like Velveeta, never have and I tend to be a bit of a food snob because I like to cook with really fresh, minimally prepared ingredients and generally would never, ever, in a million years, even begin to consider purchasing Velveeta. Then **QtM** had to come along and mention grinding Velveeta up with Spam and spreading it on toast. Now _that_ sounds good. Thank you **anyrose** (and by extension Alton Brown) for the tip about making cheese sauce with cheddar. I’ve tried and failed before and that was probably my issue, adding the cheese all at once. Now I’m craving mac and cheese with all the mix ins that **silenus** talked about. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/93 "2007-06-07T14:37:37Z")
I forgot to say: one of my childhood memories is watching my dad sit down with the block of velveeta. He’d cut off a few slices and eat them with black pepper on top. He’d do some weird stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/94 "2007-06-07T17:24:47Z")
[QUOTE=Shirley Ujest] When I was a lass, my mother never bought Velveeta or salami because it was Poor People Food (or something). [/QUOTE] Velveeta is $4.99 a pound. My local grocer has center cut pork chops on sale for $1.99. Maybe it was cheaper in the olden days. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/95 "2007-06-07T19:05:24Z")
[QUOTE=ralph124c] Who makes that US Govt.-issued “chees-like” stuff, which is dispensed in large slabs? It was commonly referred to as “welfare” cheese. It was pretty much the same as velveeta. [/QUOTE] I think the USDA makes that using donated or taxpayer-subsidized milk… maybe has some big dairies under contract. We used to get those cheesy two-by-fours by the truckload when I was a summer camp counselor. It’s similar to Velveeta but not identical - whiter in color, IIRC, and a slightly more solid texture. I can’t say I’m a huge Velveeta fan, but it’s OK. Haven’t tried many of the recipes shared here, but I hope to. For mac and cheese, I go for cheddar and parmesan cheese with a little Campbell’s Cream of Mushroom soup mixed in. This is good stuff, too: [http://www.annies.com/products/macaroni\_cheese.html](http://www.annies.com/products/macaroni_cheese.html) ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/96 "2007-06-07T19:26:01Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] This is good stuff, too: [http://www.annies.com/products/macaroni\_cheese.html](http://www.annies.com/products/macaroni_cheese.html) [/QUOTE] That’s the stand-by for my friend’s picky kids, when they will eat nothing else. ---
**Author:** ![Plynck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Plynck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Plynck)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/97 "2007-06-07T19:50:27Z")
[QUOTE=Shagnasty] My wife … is the only female ever inducted into a 500 year old secret French cheese guild). [/QUOTE] I think that I read about that guild in a book. \*“The da Vacherin Code.” \* Cheesy plot. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/98 "2007-06-07T20:22:04Z")
[QUOTE=overlyverbose] Yep, and it makes a really good crispy, buttery outside. But, you can’t use the low-fat version because it doesn’t cook properly. Oh, I almost forgot. Since this thread made me crave cheese food so much, I tried making a grilled cheese with butter last night. It was delicious, though it tasted about the same as one with mayo. [/QUOTE] Same here today. I went out and got myself some Campbell’s tomato soup to complete the lunch. You know, I never grew up on tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches (my folks were both born in Poland), but I still feel like eating a Kraft singles grilled cheese with Campbell’s takes me back to childhood, although apparently not my own. Tried it with the mayo. Works pretty well, actually. Slightly less hassle than dealing with butter, although, I must say, I love the taste of butter, but a good trick to know if I run out! ---
**Author:** ![romansperson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/romansperson/32/17100_2.png) [@romansperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/romansperson)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/99 "2007-06-07T20:23:33Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] This is good stuff, too: [http://www.annies.com/products/macaroni\_cheese.html](http://www.annies.com/products/macaroni_cheese.html) [/QUOTE] I love the White Cheddar version of Annie’s. Yum! I used to buy it by the case via mail order after the store I bought it at went out of business. Fortunately the store I shop at now started carrying it about a year ago. Kraft just started making a new mac and cheese called Bistro Deluxe, which is awfully good too - it’s supposed to be ‘mac and cheese for adults.’ Something tells me Velveeta is still involved though … ---
**Author:** ![devilsknew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4da419/32.png) [@devilsknew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/devilsknew)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2007, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755/100 "2007-06-08T00:34:19Z")
[QUOTE=kittenblue] I used to go to a fairly fancy restaurant that set out a crock of a delicious, tangy cheese spread with crackers. I got the recipe from them, and was shocked to discover that it was not made with any fancy cheeses, but with Velveeta. The texture was totally different than that of the Velveeta. Here it is: Cheese Spread 3 lb. block of Velveeta 1 small jar horseradish (I think it’s 4 oz…Woebber’s) Sherry…fill the empty horseradish jar and dump in 1 T Worchestershire sauce Mix all the ingredients together and let stand…I put it in the fridge for a few hours or overnight. Then process in food processor or in a mixer until smooth. Serve with crackers and breadsticks. [/QUOTE] That sounds interesting and pretty good… it almost sounds like a Win Schuler Bar-Scheeze knockoff. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/velveeta/406755.md?page=6)