# Very proud of my spouse yesterday **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 11, 2019, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959 "2019-03-11T17:31:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/1 "2019-03-11T17:31:26Z")
Well, I’m proud of her fearlessness in general, but yesterday seemed noteworthy. We have good local transit, including light rail. All of these have priority seating for seniors and disabled folks, and it is clearly marked as such. But it seems that people of a certain age are either too engaged with their smart phones or just don’t give a shit that someone older may need to sit for a lengthy ride. For a city that is supposedly so friendly, there are a lot of self-absorbed people. The train was crowded yesterday when we got on carrying our purchases, and there were some 20- or 30-somethings occupying all of the senior seating. A few of them even looked up at us as we got on the train, then went right back to staring at their tiny screens as we stood there. My lovely, talented and fearless spouse leaned over two of them as though squinting at the sign, and loudly read off “Oh look: Priority seating: you are required to move for seniors and people with disabilities.” Then stood back upright and waited. One of the two sitting there finally squeaked out “Oh, would you like to sit down?” No, dumbass, I’d like to stand for the next twenty minutes so you can LOL to your ‘friends’. Being nicer than I am, she just said “Why yes, thank you.” ---
**Author:** ![Jasmine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jasmine/32/2964_2.png) [@Jasmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jasmine)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/2 "2019-03-11T17:36:12Z")
She shoots … she scores! Good for her! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/3 "2019-03-11T17:58:59Z")
Sweet. ---
**Author:** ![bibliophage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bibliophage/32/7615_2.png) [@bibliophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophage)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/4 "2019-03-11T20:08:30Z")
What’s that? You? A _senior_?! Why, ma’am, I do most heartily apologize. I was deceived by your youthful glow and girlish charm. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/5 "2019-03-11T20:12:10Z")
> [@bibliophage](#): > > What’s that? You? A _senior_?! Why, ma’am, I do most heartily apologize. I was deceived by your youthful glow and girlish charm. Yeah, I thought you were asking for that old codger you came in with… ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/6 "2019-03-11T20:20:12Z")
“Pardon me, but I’m pregnant. Would you let me have your seat?” “Well, certainly. Please - sit down.” _She does so. The gentleman notices that she is quite slender in the waist._ “Pardon me for asking, but how long have you been pregnant?” “About twenty minutes - and I can still hardly walk!” Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Ruken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f475e1/32.png) [@Ruken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruken)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/7 "2019-03-11T22:24:58Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Well, I’m proud of her fearlessness in general, but yesterday seemed noteworthy. We have good local transit, including light rail. All of these have priority seating for seniors and disabled folks, and it is clearly marked as such. But it seems that people of a certain age are either too engaged with their smart phones or just don’t give a shit that someone older may need to sit for a lengthy ride. For a city that is supposedly so friendly, there are a lot of self-absorbed people. > > The train was crowded yesterday when we got on carrying our purchases, and there were some 20- or 30-somethings occupying all of the senior seating. A few of them even looked up at us as we got on the train, then went right back to staring at their tiny screens as we stood there. My lovely, talented and fearless spouse leaned over two of them as though squinting at the sign, and loudly read off “Oh look: Priority seating: you are required to move for seniors and people with disabilities.” Then stood back upright and waited. One of the two sitting there finally squeaked out “Oh, would you like to sit down?” No, dumbass, I’d like to stand for the next twenty minutes so you can LOL to your ‘friends’. Being nicer than I am, she just said “Why yes, thank you.” Or just use your words and ask to sit. This sort of passive aggressive bullshit is something to be embarrassed about, not proud of. Shame on the kids for paying her any mind. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/8 "2019-03-11T23:08:08Z")
> [@Ruken](#): > > Or just use your words and ask to sit. This sort of passive aggressive bullshit is something to be embarrassed about, not proud of. Shame on the kids for paying her any mind. Thank you for your threadshit and for being part of the problem. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/9 "2019-03-11T23:11:23Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Thank you for your threadshit and for being part of the problem. Exactly. Sounds like a 20-something who sits in the seniors’ seats. I’m proud of your spouse, too. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/10 "2019-03-11T23:33:54Z")
In addition to being old, I have spinal stenosis, which means I cannot remain on my feet more than five minutes, before I absolutely MUST sit down. On a recent visit to Motor Vehicles, I knew the place would be crowded, so I brought my cane, in case I had to stand. A very nice young lady saw my cane and offered me her seat. I’ll always be grateful for that. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/11 "2019-03-11T23:57:50Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > “Pardon me, but I’m pregnant. Would you let me have your seat?” > > “Well, certainly. Please - sit down.” > > _She does so. The gentleman notices that she is quite slender in the waist._ > > “Pardon me for asking, but how long have you been pregnant?” > > “About twenty minutes - and I can still hardly walk!” > > Regards, > Shodan A little misogyny anyone? ---
**Author:** ![GaryM](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garym/32/241_2.png) [@GaryM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaryM)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2019, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/12 "2019-03-12T00:27:24Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > In addition to being old, I have spinal stenosis, which means I cannot remain on my feet more than five minutes, before I absolutely MUST sit down. On a recent visit to Motor Vehicles, I knew the place would be crowded, so I brought my cane, in case I had to stand. A very nice young lady saw my cane and offered me her seat. I’ll always be grateful for that. Have you considered something like [this](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0051OFXY8/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_U_iXVHCbCZN75AE)? I purchased a similar item for my wife to use when we went on trips with a church group. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2019, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/13 "2019-03-12T00:33:33Z")
Good ffor ChefWife! Years back, I was commuting to and from work via Metro (DC area). I had sprained my ankle. I remember one occasion standing directly in front of the “move for senior / disabled” seats, with my cane. The seat occupants didn’t even have the excuse of being locked into their screens. Now, I did have someone offer me a seat once, entirely unsolicited, a couple years back. To be fair, this was after the insanely overcrowded car caused me to actually faint… I don’t recommend this as a way of getting a seat, but it did work. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2019, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/14 "2019-03-12T00:53:00Z")
> [@GaryM](#): > > Have you considered something like [this](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0051OFXY8/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_U_iXVHCbCZN75AE)? > > I purchased a similar item for my wife to use when we went on trips with a church group. I used one of those before and after back surgery last year and it was a huge help. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2019, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/15 "2019-03-12T01:40:25Z")
> [@Ruken](#): > > Or just use your words and ask to sit. This sort of passive aggressive bullshit is something to be embarrassed about, not proud of. Shame on the kids for paying her any mind. You don’t know shit about passive agressive. :rolleyes: The Passive aggressive option would be : “Oh look! We are in the presence of really special people. The kind of special people who get to ignore the rules and sit where ever they want instead of letting the designated people sit there. Normally people who sit in seats designated for others, without conscience, when everybody knows they shouldn’t, are worthless assholes , But some people are just so special they can just sit there pretending they don’t notice everybody else seeing how special they really are” ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2019, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/16 "2019-03-12T04:34:38Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Well, I’m proud of her fearlessness in general, but yesterday seemed noteworthy. We have good local transit, including light rail. All of these have priority seating for seniors and disabled folks, and it is clearly marked as such. But it seems that people of a certain age are either too engaged with their smart phones or just don’t give a shit that someone older may need to sit for a lengthy ride. For a city that is supposedly so friendly, there are a lot of self-absorbed people. > > The train was crowded yesterday when we got on carrying our purchases, and there were some 20- or 30-somethings occupying all of the senior seating. A few of them even looked up at us as we got on the train, then went right back to staring at their tiny screens as we stood there. My lovely, talented and fearless spouse leaned over two of them as though squinting at the sign, and loudly read off “Oh look: Priority seating: you are required to move for seniors and people with disabilities.” Then stood back upright and waited. One of the two sitting there finally squeaked out “Oh, would you like to sit down?” No, dumbass, I’d like to stand for the next twenty minutes so you can LOL to your ‘friends’. Being nicer than I am, she just said “Why yes, thank you.” So, did they move, or did they basically say, “Sucks to be you”? ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2019, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/17 "2019-03-14T00:47:01Z")
I’ll say this for the teens in Montreal. Even while on their phones, they notice me when I get on a bus and invariably one will offer me their seat. Sometimes, I get on a Metro for just two stops and I have to explain to someone that I don’t even want to sit down. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2019, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/18 "2019-03-14T00:52:08Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > Exactly. Sounds like a 20-something who sits in the seniors’ seats. I’m proud of your spouse, too. 🙂 Seriously, man. I’ve had people pull that crap on me _when I was on crutches_ after leg surgery. And I was wearing shorts, so it’s not like they missed the cast. I think however they are called out is just dandy. (In my case, it was another young man standing next to me who asked in a loud stage voice, “you’re in a cast and on crutches. Don’t you think you should be sitting down in these seats right here where those young men are sitting and reading the newspaper?” “Why yes, yes I do. That would be VERY helpful!” Finally one of them was embarrassed enough to give me a seat.) ---
**Author:** ![Iggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iggy/32/3364_2.png) [@Iggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iggy)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2019, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/19 "2019-03-14T01:00:42Z")
> [@wolfman](#): > > You don’t know shit about passive agressive. :rolleyes: > > The Passive aggressive option would be : > > “Oh look! We are in the presence of really special people. The kind of special people who get to ignore the rules and sit where ever they want instead of letting the designated people sit there. Normally people who sit in seats designated for others, without conscience, when everybody knows they shouldn’t, are worthless assholes , But some people are just so special they can just sit there pretending they don’t notice everybody else seeing how special they really are” And if I were the target of such passive-aggressiveness I would tell the speaker to go pound sand. You can ask for a seat but it is presumptuous to think that someone is not disabled because they don’t obviously look disabled. I have absolutely no duty to discuss my medical situation with a stranger on public transit. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2019, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959/20 "2019-03-14T01:18:14Z")
> [@Iggy](#): > > And if I were the target of such passive-aggressiveness I would tell the speaker to go pound sand. You can ask for a seat but it is presumptuous to think that someone is not disabled because they don’t obviously look disabled. I have absolutely no duty to discuss my medical situation with a stranger on public transit. Perhaps, but what do you think the odds are that on any given train car with all handicapped seats taken, every person in a handicapped seat who doesn’t appear to have a disability actually has an invisible disability? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/very-proud-of-my-spouse-yesterday/830959.md?page=2)