I thought of another one that wasn’t that bad.
The Double Dragon movie. It had a kind of cheesy TMNT feel and look to it but Alyssa Milano in those tight jean shorts made up for a lot of the films short-comings.
Exactly. But the postman is called Luj Skaiawaka, the cat is Chew-wallah, the Maharajha has a breathing apparatus and the mail makes lightsaber sounds for no reason. So it’s just the same ! 
Seriously though, it’s not that Advent Children’s plot was hard to follow… it’s that even if you somehow managed to follow it (a miracle in itself, even if your knowledge of everything FF VII and its sequels, derivatives and bit plots is exceptional) IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE. It has nothing to do with the existing plot elements, goes from nowhere to nowhere, then Sephiroth suddenly appears out of nowhere because fuck it, that’s who the fans are here to see.
And when the plot is over, nothing has been resolved except maybe Cloud isn’t such a whiny little bitch any more, which he wasn’t so much in the game to begin with anyway.
If ever there was a film where the “plot” serviced the action like a desperate crack whore, it’s this one. It’s like a porn flick, except it’s about choreographed beatdowns instead of choreographed cumshots.
/me inserts a link to choreographed final fantasy beatdowns
I didn’t even know there was a Double Dragon movie. It has a 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, though.