# Viking vs. Pirate **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 22, 2003, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076 "2003-09-22T13:29:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/1 "2003-09-22T13:29:26Z")
im not entirely sure which forum to stick this in, so mods feel to shift it if im in the wrong one. place your bets now! who’s going to win in a fight between a Pirate captain and a Viking king? they’re both at the top of their games, armed, pirate with a cutlass, viking with a sword. anything goes. and they’re on a desert island, being cheered on by their respective pirate ship and viking longboat crews. my moneys on the Pirate, for no other reason that i like pirates. your thoughts please, this is to settle an office argument. i am outnumbered 2 to 1, by my ‘colleagues’ that think the Viking would win, due to the fact that theres no money in it for the Pirate so he would’nt be giving his all, which i think is a crap reason, because he’s fighting for pirate pride. Arr! ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/2 "2003-09-22T13:42:56Z")
Yarrr, do ye love her? Then cut off the lassie’s head and parade thy love on the yardarm for all the landlubbers to see, yarrrrr. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/3 "2003-09-22T13:45:49Z")
Well, if it’s a boat agains boat battle, the pirates win, simply because they can blow the vikings out of the water before they ever board. There’s just no contest there. But in combat? It’s the vikings, hands down. Even discounting the berserker rage, they’re just bigger, stronger, and have better weapons. Both fight in mainly brute strength kind of ways, and a heavy two handed sword chomps down on a pirate’s cutless any day. And Vikings are more likely to survive several cuts before succumbing, whereas one whack from a Viking’s sword, and the pirate’s down. Hell, even a musket shot would probably just piss the bastard off. ---
**Author:** ![Kinthalis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kinthalis/32/16084_2.png) [@Kinthalis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kinthalis)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/4 "2003-09-22T13:55:22Z")
Well a pirate would not be wearing any armor. I’m guessing a viking king is likely to be wearing the traditional chainmail tunic helm and shield. Hmmm, I would place my bet with the Viking, simply due to the extra protection. I’m not fmailiar with the typical skill of a pirate with a blade as compare to a viking king however. It would seem likely to me that the viking would have received more training with the weapon than a Pirate would have with his. But someone correct me if I’m wrong 😉 So my mooney’s on the viking. oh yeah… Hardy har har maite, I’ll be walking the plank soon’er than ye think! I may be a baudy pirate, but I be no bloody swordsman! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/5 "2003-09-22T14:28:51Z")
Vikings. They have better hats. ---
**Author:** ![Jenaroph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/6 "2003-09-22T14:39:53Z")
It takes a viking to raze a village. (renaissance fest t-shirt) ---
**Author:** ![Floater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/dc4da7/32.png) [@Floater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Floater)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/7 "2003-09-22T16:04:51Z")
The vikings transversed the North Atlantic in open boats. Pirates were sissies sailing around under the hot Caribbean sun. It takes men to win this contest. ---
**Author:** ![SanguineSpider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SanguineSpider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanguineSpider)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/8 "2003-09-22T16:13:17Z")
VIKINGS RAWK!!! Spider just happens to have Norse in her veins! WHOOOOOOOOT! ---
**Author:** ![SanguineSpider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SanguineSpider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanguineSpider)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/9 "2003-09-22T16:15:09Z")
and some Scottish/Irish, but they went there, too! ---
**Author:** ![White\_Lightning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@White\_Lightning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Lightning)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/10 "2003-09-22T18:07:31Z")
It’s supposed to be Pirates vs. Ninjas. If this is a spinoff, at least acknowledge that. ---
**Author:** ![JerH](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/bb73d2/32.png) [@JerH](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JerH)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/11 "2003-09-22T20:02:24Z")
It depends on whether it’s a baseball or a football game. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/12 "2003-09-23T12:19:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by White Lightning \* > \*\*It’s supposed to be Pirates vs. Ninjas. If this is a spinoff, at least acknowledge that. \*\* it can’t be a spinoff if i havent seen the original thread now can it. read the OP. office argument. so there ---
**Author:** ![Jennyrosity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@Jennyrosity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennyrosity)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/13 "2003-09-23T12:32:06Z")
Seeing as the Vikings sucessfully invaded Northumbria, I’m gonna go with them. Anyone who can start a fight with a Geordie AND WIN is pretty much unbeatable. Or a Glaswegian. ---
**Author:** ![White\_Lightning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@White\_Lightning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Lightning)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/14 "2003-09-23T20:56:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by \*\*paulberserker \*\*\* > it can’t be a spinoff if i havent seen the original thread now can it. It’s not a thread, it’s an entire movement. A lifestyle, almost. Just a freak coincidence I guess. Anyway, pirates would win, they’re sneakier than vikings. (But ninjas could crush them both) ---
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2003, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/15 "2003-09-24T09:32:40Z")
BAH! You can’t claim this is a spin off thread, because as long as I’ve known, the biggest challange has been “Cowboys vs. Indians”. And from there have spawned such debates as “Pirates vs. Vikings”, “Cowboys vs. Pirates”, “Cowboys vs. Dinosaurs”, and, well, a lot more involving Cowboys than ninjas. If anything, the ninja argument is an aftereffect. And no matter how sneaky Pirates are, Vikings are just as sneaky…they only choose to be more blatant because, well, it’s worked so far. I mean, how many countries have been conquered by pirates? Terrorized, maybe, but Vikings have taken over a lot of the European coast and England/Ireland. Lets see some pirates do that! I love pirates as much as the next guy, but it’s really no contest. ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2003, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/viking-vs-pirate/203076/16 "2003-09-24T13:24:40Z")
PBS just recently had a short series on called (I think) _Warrior Challenge_ and they taught modern people to use old weapons. One of the episodes was the Vikings! (Yay!) You average Viking raider had a couple of throwing spears (I did not know that) and a shield plus a hammer or axe and dirks and assorted knives. Swords were rare, but a Viking King would probably be able to lay his pillaging hands on one. Plus he could probably score some armour, probably leather, and a helmet. (No horns though, but that would make the hat cooler.) Pirates on the other hand have a couple of flint lock pistols and a cutlass. Assuming both the pistols fire the first time he’d have a slight edge. Although the pistols would have roughly the same accurate range as the Viking’s spears. So, unless the Pirate’s parrot is a little ninja-y, on land, the edge goes to the Viking. On water, the Pirate’s cannon take the day.