# ~~~ Virtual Christmas Party ~~~ **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 14, 2003, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862 "2003-12-14T00:52:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![Frankenbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c0e974/32.png) [@Frankenbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frankenbear)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/221 "2003-12-22T05:35:23Z")
:shakes the camera, trying to get **SixSwordS** out: At least all you do is get sent to alternate universes. I usually break the cameras. ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/222 "2003-12-22T05:43:53Z")
_takes **SanguineSpider** by the hand all gentleman-like and strikes a pre-victory pose for **Elaella** ’s all-seeing camera_ _gesturing towards the pool_ Shall we, my dear? Best to get chocolated up now before the real work begins. Better lose whatever clothing you don’t want to get ruined. I’m keeping my Santa hat but the Christmas Grinch socks are going. _suddenly takes **Sanguine** down by the shoulders and lathers her up in a flurry of chocolatey goodness. Whips off Santa hat and declares loudly in a menacing voice…_ I HAVE THE POWER OF CHOCOLATE! (chocolate! chocolate!) Whoa, cool echo. Ahem. What foolish mortals dare to enter the ring with the deadly duo of **SanguineSpider** , Warrior Queen, and I, **Horseflesh** , the Prince of Hershey, the King of Kisses? Speak knaves, or bow down before our glory. What about you, good sir? _points at **SiXSwordS** _ Do you and your comely redheaded wench wish to prove your worthiness in the Ring of Death By Chocolate? Step forward, lackeys, and receive your spankings. _dons Santa hat and steadies self on kiddie pool rim_ Bartender, have we run out of Butter Nipples? I require refreshment! ---
**Author:** ![Angua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8baadc/32.png) [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/223 "2003-12-22T10:36:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Horseflesh \* > \*\* > _find two inflated kiddie pools in the magic closet, fills one with eggnog and the other with Hershey’s chocolate_ > > Anyone up for a dip? I’ve got some wrasslin’ moves I’ve been wanting to try out… \*\* Oooh!! Chocolate mud wrestling! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Abdominal\_Snowman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f04885/32.png) [@Abdominal\_Snowman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abdominal_Snowman)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/224 "2003-12-22T13:59:28Z")
Wow, I was invited to this shindig by Elaella, but now I’m a little frightened… Well, I suppose there’s only one thing for it! \*strips to the waste and smears chest in chocolate" BRING IT ON! _puts Horseflesh in headlock, while attempting to fend off SanguineSpider with other arm_ Nice to meet you, now quit hitting me with SixSwordS adult toy! ---
**Author:** ![Chimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@Chimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimpy)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/225 "2003-12-22T14:07:22Z")
Am I too late for the Chocolate wrestling tournament? Here I come LOOK OUT **Abdominal** SPLAT ---
**Author:** ![Jennyrosity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@Jennyrosity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennyrosity)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/226 "2003-12-22T14:15:17Z")
Damn it! My genii costume is covered in chocolate now! _Goes into costume cupboard, comes back in Ursula Andress-style bikini._ Is there room in the chocolate paddling pool for me? ---
**Author:** ![Chimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@Chimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimpy)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/227 "2003-12-22T14:19:53Z")
come on in **Jennyroisity** by the way presents for everyone in my bag. _takes flying dive into pool slides out of other side_ ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/228 "2003-12-22T14:26:35Z")
**SexSwordS** , looks like we got another one on our side. Welcome to the party, **BigDaiv** and **Abdominal Snowman**. Help yourselves to some drinks, and by all means feel free to get nekkie. ---
**Author:** ![Chimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@Chimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimpy)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/229 "2003-12-22T14:59:03Z")
GET NAKED LAST ONE GETS NO PRESENTS _leaps on **Horseflesh** pinning him to bottom of kiddy-pool_ ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/230 "2003-12-22T15:10:59Z")
:: looks around :: I am getting more presents. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/231 "2003-12-22T15:38:23Z")
IT HAS BEGUN! _cue Mortal Kombat music_ _splats **BigDaiv** full in the face with a handful of chocolate, causing him to release his grip to clear his eyes, then twists out of **Abdominal Snowman** ’s headlock with the help of the slippery dark liquid_ Hmmm, ice cream with chocoalte syrup. My favorite! You shouldn’t have, really. _sweeps **Abdominal** ’s legs, then puts him in a figure four leglock while simultaneously putting **BigDaiv** in a reverse full nelson and delivering a Stone Cold Stunner_ Hah, 3 years of watching the WWF is finally paying off! Come on in **Sanguine** and give this big galoot a spanking. Smother him if you have too. _spies **Jennyrosity** , grabs her ankle and gives a yank_ In chocolate wrestling, all bikinis are the same. And by that I mean missing… _unties **Jenny** ’s top with a practiced move_ ---
**Author:** ![Jennyrosity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@Jennyrosity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennyrosity)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/232 "2003-12-22T17:11:41Z")
No fair, I was having fun pretending to be a Bond girl! Oh sod it! _Smothers Horseflesh in chocolate and kisses._ ---
**Author:** ![Chimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@Chimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimpy)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/233 "2003-12-22T17:20:24Z")
_shaking his head as he regains consciousness to see **Horseflesh** and **Jennyrosity** “wrestling”_ OI OI you two break it up **CHOCO-SLIDING RUGBY TACKLE OF DOOM** _the entire group slide at a ridiculous speed and out of the pool landing squarely on the rest of the party_ suddenly a voice from the bottom of the pile shouts “Foods done” and the entire party run into the dining room ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/234 "2003-12-22T17:26:49Z")
Ho, ho, ho! A worthy opponent. _takes the punishment from **Jennyrosity** , then returns the same twofold_ This is more fun than a pool full of chocolate Dopers! **Jenny** , I’m afraid you’re not **completely** covered in chocolate. May I? Or do I have to put you in a Brazilian jujitsu submission hold? ---
**Author:** ![Abdominal\_Snowman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f04885/32.png) [@Abdominal\_Snowman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abdominal_Snowman)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/235 "2003-12-22T17:55:00Z")
_wakes up from the incredible pain of having Horseflesh’s legs wrapped around him_ Bugger all, I can’t take that! I WON’T take that! _grabs tin foil covered Festivus pole and proceeds to wreak major havoc on Horseflesh’s head and nether regions_ Ah HA! Take that! And that! _Grabs BigDaiv and puts him in the Phantasmal Flying Choco-rific Butt Kicking of Terror Hold_ Now THAT’S a Christmas Party! ---
**Author:** ![Chimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@Chimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimpy)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/236 "2003-12-22T18:01:08Z")
Fortunately i learnt to counter Phantasmal Flying Choco-rific Butt Kicking of Terror Hold during my long stay in kanchunia and this results in **Abdominal Snowman** ending up at the bottom of a huge dog-pile ---
**Author:** ![zephyrine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/35a633/32.png) [@zephyrine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zephyrine)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/237 "2003-12-22T20:05:34Z")
Oh no! There’s been naked chocowrestling going on and I didn’t notice! I was too busy buttering my nipples (er… that’s what I was supposed to do, right? I may be a little confused. I was telling my life story to what I thought was a strangely inert partydoper when someone pointed out that he strongly resembled a coat rack). Did someone mention food? Might be a good idea… on the other hand, chocolate is food, isn’t it? _instantly perks up at the sight of chocolate-coated people_ ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/238 "2003-12-22T20:22:14Z")
_Entering the front door is a short (4’ 7") blue and orange man wearing a **SiXSwordS** costume._ Me likey **misstee**. ipismischticate! Me wantei much likker drinkers. zizleit barghinder. Choco choco wrestle. You takest like **SiXSwords** picture image. Who desire kissey kisser? _puckers lips and runs towards **zepheryine** _ ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/239 "2003-12-22T20:33:33Z")
**BLAST!!!** **storms in out of the snow** I’m late… and entirely too sober… and clothed… and un-chocolate-y… **HELP!!** ---
**Author:** ![zephyrine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/35a633/32.png) [@zephyrine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zephyrine)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862/240 "2003-12-22T20:34:13Z")
Aargh! Get away from me! I want big, strapping chocolate covered men, or failing that, a decent coat rack who is interested in me as a person! HEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/virtual-christmas-party/218862.md?page=13)