# Waffle-shaped burns on my penis **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 10, 2009, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525 "2009-09-10T06:22:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6bbea6/32.png) [@The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Seventh_Deadly_Finn)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/1 "2009-09-10T06:22:25Z")
I’ve got these waffle-style burns on my penis. Care to tell me how I got them? Some asshole’s probably going to ask me if I’ve been putting my penis in a waffle iron. How the hell should I know? Fuck you. ---
**Author:** ![ajb867](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f14d63/32.png) [@ajb867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ajb867)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/2 "2009-09-10T06:29:47Z")
You paid me fifty bucks and you left the damn waffle iron in my bathroom. ---
**Author:** ![Face\_Intentionally\_Left\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/face_intentionally_left_blank/32/288_2.png) [@Face\_Intentionally\_Left\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Face_Intentionally_Left_Blank)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/3 "2009-09-10T06:38:02Z")
The Shadow knows. Ask him. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/4 "2009-09-10T06:48:38Z")
> [@The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](#): > > Fuck you. Not with a burnt penis thank you very much. ---
**Author:** ![ivn1188](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e480ec/32.png) [@ivn1188](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivn1188)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/5 "2009-09-10T06:48:48Z")
props ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Nader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Darth\_Nader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Nader)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/6 "2009-09-10T07:01:49Z")
Have you been putting your penis in a waffle iron? What kind of car do you drive? ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/7 "2009-09-10T07:06:38Z")
Kinda puts a whole new spin on “leggo my eggo”, don’t it? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6bbea6/32.png) [@The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Seventh_Deadly_Finn)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/8 "2009-09-10T07:07:15Z")
> [@Darth\_Nader](#): > > Have you been putting your penis in a waffle iron? What kind of car do you drive? Japanese. Gray. Can’t remember what it’s called. ---
**Author:** ![StaudtCJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/90ced4/32.png) [@StaudtCJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StaudtCJ)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/9 "2009-09-10T07:07:46Z")
Don’t sunbathe nude under the mosquito netting anymore? ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/10 "2009-09-10T07:21:46Z")
Gives a new spin to the jingle “waffly versatile”. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/11 "2009-09-10T07:24:09Z")
Have you been fucking any Belgians? ---
**Author:** ![Mr\_Buttons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@Mr\_Buttons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr_Buttons)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/12 "2009-09-10T07:36:04Z")
Maybe fell onto a BBQ grill while drunk? The little metal trays can get quite hot, maybe you fell on it, did a “youch!”, then fell on it again at a 90 degree angle, giving it the BBQ look? If it’s not that, I’d recommend staying away from the crazy bitch you hooked up with last night. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mr\_Buttons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@Mr\_Buttons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr_Buttons)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/13 "2009-09-10T07:41:40Z")
> [@The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](#): > > Some asshole’s probably going to ask me if I’ve been putting my penis in a waffle iron. How the hell should I know? Fuck you. Ok, I gotta know. If you don’t know where your penis has been, how the hell are we supposed to know? :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Tabby\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tabby\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tabby_Cat)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/14 "2009-09-10T07:47:35Z")
Ok I’m going to get in trouble laughing at work _snerk_ ---
**Author:** ![Roland\_Orzabal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@Roland\_Orzabal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roland_Orzabal)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/15 "2009-09-10T08:07:07Z")
Whatever the eventual outcome of this thread, it has made my personal list of all-time classics. Well played, sir. ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 9:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/16 "2009-09-10T09:07:28Z")
If “burns” = “raised welts”. ☹ [Kool Moe Dee] Go to the doctor [off/Kool Moe Dee] ---
**Author:** ![CT\_Damsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CT\_Damsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CT_Damsel)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 9:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/17 "2009-09-10T09:07:40Z")
:mad:I put your dick in the waffle iron, and I’d do it again!:mad: ---
**Author:** ![Elyanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b5ac83/32.png) [@Elyanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elyanna)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 9:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/18 "2009-09-10T09:31:12Z")
You met a girl with waffle-maker for a vagina. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 9:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/19 "2009-09-10T09:33:29Z")
The Wages of Gin are Death. Also, a waffle-ized ding-dong. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6bbea6/32.png) [@The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Seventh_Deadly_Finn)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 9:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525/20 "2009-09-10T09:57:52Z")
> [@Mr\_Buttons](#): > > Ok, I gotta know. If you don’t know where your penis has been, how the hell are we supposed to know? :eek: I said I’d never tell, but… That was my question in [the thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=530321) that inspired this one. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waffle-shaped-burns-on-my-penis/509525.md?page=2)