# Waiter/waitress rants **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 31, 2010, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357 "2010-05-31T06:07:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 15
**Author:** ![villa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc79bd/32.png) [@villa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/villa)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2010, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/281 "2010-08-11T15:40:42Z")
I may be in Virginia, but I bleed Green and Gold. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2010, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/282 "2010-08-11T15:42:22Z")
I still remember the commentary that morning on the radio show I used to listen to. “And the Amish! The Amish make _really great tables_!” ---
**Author:** ![villa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc79bd/32.png) [@villa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/villa)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2010, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/283 "2010-08-11T15:45:53Z")
I always wondered why God gave the white and asian people the **useful** gifts. I mean what kind of stepchild does that make the black people feel like? Harry Potter got better gifts from his adoptive family. [QUOTE=God] Hmmm - I’ve given out diligence and technical know-how. Who’s this here? The blacks? You mean I have to give them something? Hell, what’s left in the closet. Dance - that’ll have to do. I know, we already promised it to the gays, but they’ll just have to share. [/QUOTE] ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2010, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/284 "2010-08-11T15:55:39Z")
Well, technically, Black people got worship and celebration. So I guess that means they get to worship and celebrate everybody else? ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/285 "2010-08-11T17:56:36Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > If you can’t understand why “Black people are shitty tippers” is racist while “Black people are more likely to be shitty tippers than white people” is an observation of fact, there’s not much more I can say. This can of worms gets opened regularly, every few months, and you know what’s always in it? Worms. ---
**Author:** ![jaxbus4000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c89c15/32.png) [@jaxbus4000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaxbus4000)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2010, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/286 "2010-08-11T18:01:32Z")
Back in the day when I was a waiter, we had a clown come in on Sundays to work our champagne brunch. Well as you can imagine we had large groups of families come in. Enevitably I would get a large group. They would make such a mess of the table as they would feed their kids all the crackers and take up so much of my time running back and forth getting sodas for their kids. Yes, all part of the job. But they would run up a large bill and would only put down a couple of dollars. They were the cheapest tippers. This was a very fine restaurant, and finally they instituted a mininum gratuity. But I always loathed working on the Sunday brunch. lol. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2010, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/287 "2010-08-11T18:11:19Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > This can of worms gets opened regularly, every few months, and you know what’s always in it? A circumcised, declawed, and overweight cat driving a Hummer? > [@](#): > > Worms. Oh. > [@jaxbus4000](#): > > Enevitably I would get a large group. They would make such a mess of the table as they would feed their kids all the crackers and take up so much of my time running back and forth getting sodas for their kids. Yes, all part of the job. But they would run up a large bill and would only put down a couple of dollars. They were the cheapest tippers. Not surprising. People like that are just socially retarded. ---
**Author:** ![AWB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@AWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AWB)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/288 "2010-08-12T02:06:45Z")
> [@MTCicero](#): > > Now, as to the issue of a mandatory gratuity for large groups, he says that’s pretty much here to stay, and is a necessity for one reason (and this is how he put it): black people. He said, again, that black people were the absolute shittiest tippers he ever had to deal with. He said that it was routine for them to tip $0.07 on a $300 bill. And this was, of course, after having run the server ragged during their entire stay at the restaurant. OK, here’s my experience: I once worked at a Domino’s Pizza in suburban Maryland, about 10 miles SE of Washington, DC. I only worked there for two weeks, because tips were crappy; e.g., one night I made 18 deliveries, and only made $0.50 in tips (yes, less than 3 cents per delivery). The other nights were better, but barely. I think my overall tip:delivery ratio was $0.50/delivery. Relevance: I am white, all (yes all) of my deliveries at this store were to blacks. This _was_ suburban Maryland; single family homes on large lots, not rowhouses in inner-city. After a move to a slightly better Dominos (still below-average tips), I started working at a Virginia Dominos. Tips were well _above_ average, to a mixed-race populace. There, I saw no correlation between race and tips. And a bit of a irony: the uber-rich often undertipped. Especially the girls at a all-girls boarding school; they were @!#?@! rich, and tipped poorly. So my final analysis: it’s more neighborhood that effects tipping behavior. Each of the 10 Dominos I worked at had a general tipping level. It was mainly happenstance that the two crappy-tipping Dominos were in mostly black neighborhoods. ---
**Author:** ![MTCicero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a4c791/32.png) [@MTCicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MTCicero)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/289 "2010-08-12T02:26:16Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > > [@MTCicero](#): > > > > Well, I certainly wouldn’t want to get in the way of your feelings of white guilt. > > Yeah, objecting to blanket statements about people based on the melanin content of their skin makes me a real race traitor, all right. Maybe next week, you can tell us about how Hispanics can fit 20 or 30 people in a house, and how Asians can turn a TV into a watch. > > I’d type more, but I’m off to put my hair into shitty white girl dreadlocks and get fitted for a dashiki. _Oh_, I get it! You were going for humor there! I surmise that you’re a chick? No wonder, then, that I read your post completely straight-faced. But do keep trying. You’ve come a long way, baby (and so forth). ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/290 "2010-08-12T03:55:03Z")
**AWB** has made a false quote of me up above. I did not write what he has attributed to me. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/291 "2010-08-12T04:12:42Z")
> [@Una\_Persson](#): > > **AWB** has made a false quote of me up above. I did not write what he has attributed to me. I think it was a coding error, rather than malicious misattribution. He meant to quote **MTCicero** (who _did_ make the quoted statement), but got messed up in trying to sort out the multi-quote feature. You can see that from the [quote=“MTCicero, post:258, topic:541357”] code at the top of the post. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/292 "2010-08-12T04:13:32Z")
On the hole, I’ve found gays to be better tippers ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/293 "2010-08-12T05:33:30Z")
> [@Una\_Persson](#): > > **AWB** has made a false quote of me up above. I did not write what he has attributed to me. I’ve fixed his quote tags so the correct person is attributed. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/294 "2010-08-12T15:51:43Z")
> [@AWB](#): > > And a bit of a irony: the uber-rich often undertipped. This was my experience when I was working at the coffeeshops on my university’s campus in college. During Parents’ Week, it was inevitably the family in really expensive clothes who ordered several complicated specialty drinks and expected you to break a $100 bill that would neglect to drop anything in the tip jar, even their change. > [@MTCicero](#): > > I surmise that you’re a chick? No wonder, then, that I read your post completely straight-faced. But do keep trying. You’ve come a long way, baby (and so forth). It’s been scientifically proven that I’m hilarious. You, on the other hand, are mostly just tedious. > [@Una\_Persson](#): > > **AWB** has made a false quote of me up above. I did not write what he has attributed to me. FYI, because of all the craziness due to people screwing up attributions accidentally in the new nesting quotes system, the mods have said that if you see an error, you should report the post and they’ll come fix it. So that’s how to deal with it in the future. ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/295 "2010-08-12T17:46:42Z")
I’ve never waited tables except in a bar, but I used to have a coworker who was the most annoying person in the world to go out to eat with. She was really, really into food and would take up so much of the waitperson’s time with open-ended questions like, “So…tell me about the halibut.” or “What’s the most delicious thing you have here?” We stopped into a Starbuck’s one time and she wanted them to \*tell her \*about the blueberry muffin. She tipped well, though. probably because she is Cuban and not Black. Oh, and in all of my recent jobs, we always had to have alcohol on a separate check because it’s not allowable under federal expenses or something. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/296 "2010-08-12T17:53:04Z")
> [@lorene](#): > > We stopped into a Starbuck’s one time and she wanted them to \*tell her \*about the blueberry muffin. “It has 420 calories, 20 grams of fat, and will taste like it’s been sitting out for three days.” ---
**Author:** ![villa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc79bd/32.png) [@villa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/villa)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/297 "2010-08-12T18:01:29Z")
> [@lorene](#): > > I’ve never waited tables except in a bar, but I used to have a coworker who was the most annoying person in the world to go out to eat with. She was really, really into food and would take up so much of the waitperson’s time with open-ended questions like, “So…tell me about the halibut.” or “What’s the most delicious thing you have here?” We stopped into a Starbuck’s one time and she wanted them to \*tell her \*about the blueberry muffin. Well if a person has more information about a subject than you do, and you wish to elicit that information, you should be asking open-ended questions. Now that is ridiculous for a muffin, but I wouldn’t think twice about asking someone to “tell me about the halibut.” It’s a hell of a lot easier than asking what the size is, how is it cooked, what is the sauce like, is the sauce heavy or thin, etc, etc. And the server will probably tell me something I wanted to know but would otherwise forget to ask. ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/298 "2010-08-12T18:13:14Z")
> [@villa](#): > > Well if a person has more information about a subject than you do, and you wish to elicit that information, you should be asking open-ended questions. Now that is ridiculous for a muffin, but I wouldn’t think twice about asking someone to “tell me about the halibut.” It’s a hell of a lot easier than asking what the size is, how is it cooked, what is the sauce like, is the sauce heavy or thin, etc, etc. And the server will probably tell me something I wanted to know but would otherwise forget to ask. Yeah, the halibut example wasn’t a good one. She would ask things like, “Which is better, the lobster mac and cheese, or the steak?”—picking 2 very different dishes. I don’t know. There were places we went (we traveled for work a fair amount) where waitstaff would seem very happy to answer these kinds of questions, and other places where I could tell it was kind of a drain on them. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/299 "2010-08-12T18:20:03Z")
> [@Enderw24](#): > > On the hole, I’ve found gays to be better tippers I sure hope the typo was intentional. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357/300 "2010-08-12T18:46:10Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > FYI, because of all the craziness due to people screwing up attributions accidentally in the new nesting quotes system, the mods have said that if you see an error, you should report the post and they’ll come fix it. So that’s how to deal with it in the future. I had reported it at the time, but since the Moderators were busy I needed to clarify that I was not the one making any race-based statements. I also knew it was accidental, but I know that people often do not read carefully and sometimes the wrong word in the right ear can lead to a lot of harassment later on. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357.md?page=14) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/waiter-waitress-rants/541357.md?page=16)