# Walked out of a restaurant tonight for the first time in my life **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 2, 2013, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103 "2013-02-02T04:59:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/21 "2013-02-02T17:27:25Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > A month or so later, we went back with our coupon, and it couldn’t have been the same restaurant! The service was amazingly attentive and quick. The server was congenial, more than competent, available when we needed her, and out of the way otherwise. She got a \*huge \*tip as a reward since we were getting our second free meal from the place. That’s awesome - I hope you complimented the manager, and let corporate know as well! ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/22 "2013-02-02T17:28:45Z")
My mom still (grumpily) tells a story about my dad that happened probably 45 years ago. They, as young marrieds, had gone out to a rare meal in a fancy restaurant. Perhaps pegging them as poor hippies that probably would give a flower as a tip, the waiter took their order and vanished. Moreover, everyone who worked there seemed to be blind, because neither one of my folks could catch anyone’s eye no matter how they tried. Finally, my dad says to my mom, “We’re never coming back here, right?” She allows as how that’s probably true, both because of the prices and because the service was so appalling. Dad then took his crystal goblet of ice water and dropped it on the floor, where it shattered into a million pieces. When someone rushed over to clean it up, he leaned over and said, “While you’re here, could we get some more bread?” 🙂 She likes to tell the story as an example of how mortifying he could be (they’ve been divorced since I was seven), but I never knew anybody who heard the story that didn’t say some variation on “Way to go VERNON!” – including several waiters. ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/23 "2013-02-02T17:29:32Z")
> [@DMark](#): > > 1. You saw they were crazy busy. > 2. You ordered and got what you wanted. > 3. Somebody obviously came when you asked (thus things were boxed to take away). > 4. Nobody came to give you your check. > > OK - so playing Devil’s Advocate: > > 1. Maybe they were short staffed/under-staffed for the night. > 2. The waiter might have been covering for the normal waiter in that section when he took the order - and maybe forgot to mention your order to the waiter in that section. > 3. Food is often delivered by others who see it backing up in the kitchen and just grab and deliver while it is still hot, rather than wait for crazy busy waiter to take it to the table. > 4. Everyone was doing what they could to get food out and tables cleared as fast as possible. > > So far - they have done what they could with the number of staff and the high volume of customers. > > The fact that you didn’t get your check immediately is not a good thing for a business, but hardly the worst thing that could have happened (no service at all, wrong food, cold food, no drinks, etc.). > > So - all in all - I think it sounded like they did more than a decent job in the circumstances. I would have gone to the checker and said, “They haven’t given us the bill yet.” My guess they could have snapped fingers and gotten your check immediately and you would have paid the full amount. > > Granted - leaving the bare minimum of tip would probably be fair (after all, it is not like you built up a relationship with anyone in there that night) but it was certainly not the worst restaurant experience I have ever heard of. And to be quite honest, I am usually more annoyed with the waiters who hover and ask 30 times “Is everything OK?” and usually ask the question when your mouth is full. It reeeeeeally sounds like you’re trying to **orchestrate** a trainwreck with this post. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/24 "2013-02-02T17:36:38Z")
> [@hrhomer](#): > > It reeeeeeally sounds like you’re trying to **orchestrate** a trainwreck with this post. Lighten up, Francis. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/25 "2013-02-02T17:39:38Z")
> [@hrhomer](#): > > That’s awesome - I hope you complimented the manager, and let corporate know as well! The manager who’d given us the coupon was on duty that night and he came over to speak with us. Yes, we let him know we were impressed. Didn’t occur to me to contact anyone higher, tho. However, on other occasions at other restaurants, I have gone to websites to say nice things when we had exceptional experiences. I try to balance complaining with praising when I can. It keeps me from becoming too much of an old grouch. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Zjestika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/8edcca/32.png) [@Zjestika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zjestika)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/26 "2013-02-02T17:40:46Z")
For my birthday we went out to a place where the gimmick is that the person who makes your food brings out the dish. We got an 8 course tasting menu and had at least 4 different servers. That’s cool, it’s a cool place and the food is awesome. However, as far as I can tell there’s no one designated to bring your check when it’s over, so we waited a while until we finally had to flag someone down. It’s not the end of the world, but it’s irritating, even when the service is really good overall. ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/27 "2013-02-02T17:43:13Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > Thanks aceplace… it just blew me a way that not _once_ did anyone come by to say “how is everything?” NOTHING. Not a single word. Not even the people who gave us our food or took our plates away. Not a single “enjoy your meal” or anything. It was very bizarre. It was also _nothing_ like the first time we went there, where we got very attentive service and even the manager came by unasked to see how we were doing and how we liked the place. Is it possible the store or staff got some bad news that day? I’ve had this kind of experience a few times and handled it differently each time. Once, I finally snagged our waitress and said a polite version of “can we get some damned service here?” and she said, in a low voice, “Sorry, we all collect our last paychecks tonight.” ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/28 "2013-02-02T17:57:04Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > I never quite understand threads like this. Whenever you need any kind of help in a setting where someone should serve you in some way, track anybody down and tell them you need help. Sure, you don’t do that in the first 20 seconds, but if you’ve been waiting 10 minutes for your drink / update to your order / bill, speak up. You’re not doing anything wrong by asking for someone to assist you. Color me confused. Or just, you know, walk up to the register and tell them you need to leave. ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/29 "2013-02-02T17:57:12Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Lighten up, Francis. Right, _I’m_ the one who needs to lighten up. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/30 "2013-02-02T20:01:12Z")
> [@Chef\_Troy](#): > > My mom still (grumpily) tells a story about my dad that happened probably 45 years ago. They, as young marrieds, had gone out to a rare meal in a fancy restaurant. Perhaps pegging them as poor hippies that probably would give a flower as a tip, the waiter took their order and vanished. Moreover, everyone who worked there seemed to be blind, because neither one of my folks could catch anyone’s eye no matter how they tried. Finally, my dad says to my mom, “We’re never coming back here, right?” She allows as how that’s probably true, both because of the prices and because the service was so appalling. Dad then took his crystal goblet of ice water and dropped it on the floor, where it shattered into a million pieces. When someone rushed over to clean it up, he leaned over and said, “While you’re here, could we get some more bread?” > > 🙂 > > She likes to tell the story as an example of how mortifying he could be (they’ve been divorced since I was seven), but I never knew anybody who heard the story that didn’t say some variation on “Way to go VERNON!” – including several waiters. OK, filing this idea away for future reference. 😃 Alternately, I will start carrying an ounce of superfine glitter in a double-sealed container, and I will give the place a dose of FABULOUSNESS if I think it deserves it. As to the OP, I would have gotten up and searched for a manager. I wouldn’t have tried to catch a server’s eye and ask for the manager, I’d have searched. Sometimes, this means standing near the kitchen door. Don’t block it, just be there so that when you see someone who’s dressed a bit differently than the servers you can pounce. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/31 "2013-02-02T20:03:48Z")
Well it does kind of seem like you’re poking the bear, and egging on the train wreck that never manifested, you gotta admit! ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/32 "2013-02-02T20:30:46Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Or just, you know, walk up to the register and tell them you need to leave. I meant for _anything_ you’re not getting. Of course, if you’re ready to go and they have a register, that’s obviously what should be done. ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/33 "2013-02-02T20:49:17Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > I meant for _anything_ you’re not getting. Of course, if you’re ready to go and they have a register, that’s obviously what should be done. Or the hostess stand. ---
**Author:** ![jlzania](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/67e7ee/32.png) [@jlzania](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jlzania)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2013, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/34 "2013-02-03T18:17:19Z")
> [@Chef\_Troy](#): > > My mom still (grumpily) tells a story about my dad that happened probably 45 years ago. They, as young marrieds, had gone out to a rare meal in a fancy restaurant. Perhaps pegging them as poor hippies that probably would give a flower as a tip, the waiter took their order and vanished. Moreover, everyone who worked there seemed to be blind, because neither one of my folks could catch anyone’s eye no matter how they tried. Finally, my dad says to my mom, “We’re never coming back here, right?” She allows as how that’s probably true, both because of the prices and because the service was so appalling. Dad then took his crystal goblet of ice water and dropped it on the floor, where it shattered into a million pieces. When someone rushed over to clean it up, he leaned over and said, “While you’re here, could we get some more bread?” > > 🙂 > > She likes to tell the story as an example of how mortifying he could be (they’ve been divorced since I was seven), but I never knew anybody who heard the story that didn’t say some variation on “Way to go VERNON!” – including several waiters. Many years ago, a dear friend and I went out to a somewhat fancy schmancy restaurant in Austin for dinner. We were youngish but dressed presentably and we had both bathed earlier that day so I don’t think we had the stink lines coming off us or anything. Menus were dropped, water glasses filled and then came the very long wait. Waiters glided by Not only had someone dropped an invisibility shield over our two-top but apparently we behind a wall of silence as well because all my plaintive little ‘Excuse me’s’ were ignored. John finally became totally fed up. He tied his (white) napkin to his knife and when the noise dropped just enough, waved the knife wildly over his head and asked loudly “We surrender-now will someone take our order?” ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2013, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/35 "2013-02-03T19:16:46Z")
I’ve had two similar situations. One was at a Frisch’s Big Boy restaurant. After eating, I went to the cashier to pay for my meal. An employee was directly across from me, sweeping the floor. He completely ignored me. I cleared my throat, shuffled my feet, and he wouldn’t even glance my way. I walked around, looking for my waitress or a manager, but the restaurant was completely empty except me and the floor sweeper. I leaned over and said, “Excuse me, I’d like to pay.” He shrugged and said, “It ain’t my job.” I waited another two minutes, then left without paying. The second time was when a group of women went to a local moderately priced restaurant. I wasn’t surprised when we were given less than stellar service from a 20ish waitress, especially after most of us ordered water. After finishing our entrees, the waitress came out set down our checks down without even asking if we wanted a refill (many had empty glasses) or dessert. We actually did want dessert, but our waitress never returned to either take our money OR take our dessert order. We waited and waited, but she was MIA. We were one of the last two groups on the patio, and it was a nice night, so we continued to chat, occasionally commenting about what lousy service we’d gotten. After literally a half hour, someone went in and asked the manager to find our waitress. She came out, all bubbly and said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you’d all need change.” Really? #1) Most of us, including me, were paying with credit cards. #2) Most of the tabs were for $12-15 (because water is free!). Given that ATMs dispense twenties, it’s pretty much a given that we’d want change. To this day, I believe that she figured that we’d get sick of waiting, just throw down a twenty, and leave. Her plan backfired. That was the only time where I’ve left without paying a tip. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2013, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/36 "2013-02-03T19:26:45Z")
I’ve walked out of a restaurant once. I was in London and went to a pretty nice place. I ordered fish and chips and a cup of tea. fter about fifteen minutes, the tea arrived with a nice little jug of fresh milk. Except the milk wasn’t fresh. It was rancid. The waiter fixed that, and I waited for my meal. And I waited. And I waited. There were two other diners. After another twenty minutes, I asked the waiter what was going on. He ent to the kitchen and said the only chef was a trainee who didn’t know how to cook. I left without paying. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2013, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/37 "2013-02-03T20:06:10Z")
> [@PunditLisa](#): > > I’ve had two similar situations. One was at a Frisch’s Big Boy restaurant. After eating, I went to the cashier to pay for my meal. An employee was directly across from me, sweeping the floor. He completely ignored me. I cleared my throat, shuffled my feet, and he wouldn’t even glance my way. I walked around, looking for my waitress or a manager, but the restaurant was completely empty except me and the floor sweeper. I leaned over and said, “Excuse me, I’d like to pay.” He shrugged and said, “It ain’t my job.” > > I waited another two minutes, then left without paying. > > The second time was when a group of women went to a local moderately priced restaurant. I wasn’t surprised when we were given less than stellar service from a 20ish waitress, especially after most of us ordered water. After finishing our entrees, the waitress came out set down our checks down without even asking if we wanted a refill (many had empty glasses) or dessert. We actually did want dessert, but our waitress never returned to either take our money OR take our dessert order. We waited and waited, but she was MIA. We were one of the last two groups on the patio, and it was a nice night, so we continued to chat, occasionally commenting about what lousy service we’d gotten. > > After literally a half hour, someone went in and asked the manager to find our waitress. She came out, all bubbly and said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you’d all need change.” > > Really? > > #1) Most of us, including me, were paying with credit cards. > #2) Most of the tabs were for $12-15 (because water is free!). Given that ATMs dispense twenties, it’s pretty much a given that we’d want change. > > To this day, I believe that she figured that we’d get sick of waiting, just throw down a twenty, and leave. Her plan backfired. That was the only time where I’ve left without paying a tip. This is the worst - being asked if you need change. Don’t ask, just bring the change. In my experience, the only ones who resort to this are the ones who know they give lousy service (or who wonder why people give them such small tips) and try to scam/shame you into leaving more. Roddy ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2013, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/38 "2013-02-03T20:37:46Z")
Sometimes I envy those people who can summon cabs with a piercing two-fingers-in-the-mouth whistle. It’d work great at restaurants (no reason however you can’t carry your own whistle on a keychain for service emergencies). > [@PunditLisa](#): > > I’ve had two similar situations. One was at a Frisch’s Big Boy restaurant. After eating, I went to the cashier to pay for my meal. An employee was directly across from me, sweeping the floor. He completely ignored me. I cleared my throat, shuffled my feet, and he wouldn’t even glance my way. I walked around, looking for my waitress or a manager, but the restaurant was completely empty except me and the floor sweeper. I leaned over and said, “Excuse me, I’d like to pay.” He shrugged and said, “It ain’t my job.” > > I waited another two minutes, then left without paying. It’s probably [not a good idea](http://www.toledoblade.com/Police-Fire/2011/11/20/Restaurant-worker-accused-of-pouring-animal-medication-into-pot-of-coffee.html) to mess with the help at Frisch’s. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2013, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/39 "2013-02-03T20:45:43Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > He (w)ent to the kitchen and said the only chef was a trainee who didn’t know how to cook. The mind boggles that this could happen. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2013, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103/40 "2013-02-03T22:06:45Z")
On a trip to San Francisco, my husband and I cut our meal short when we had received an appetizer (after a fairly long wait) and meanwhile had seen many delivery orders flying out the doors, and another customer who came in significantly after us received her appetizer right after we got ours. We told the waiter to cancel our entrees, paid for what we did get and tipped him decently enough, and walked across the street to a restaurant we saw that ended up being one of the best sushi-eating experiences of our lives. Our best guess was that this place was mostly a delivery joint that didn’t really do much seated service during the dinner hour (seeing as we were one of only two tables at the start of dinner), and the one waiter was pushed out to deal with dining room customers between other restaurant duties or something. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/walked-out-of-a-restaurant-tonight-for-the-first-time-in-my-life/649103.md?page=3)