# Wanna see who can make the most noise? I'll take that bet, motherfucker. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 31, 2007, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250 "2007-05-31T21:42:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/1 "2007-05-31T21:42:44Z")
For the last two weeks you have hammered, sawed, and made an obscene amount of noise building your jerry-rigged truck structure. It’s a piece of shit and so are you. You’d think that the 7-foot cop who came over and told you to cut it out last Sunday would have gotten his message across. But you are so motherfucking dense that you would defy a man who frightened even me, and he was on my side! It’s not bad enough that you screamed at your wife when she came to get her stuff from your crappy, dilapidated house that you have tried to sell three times in a year. You made your kids cry so loud that my daughter asked me what was wrong over there. What should I tell her? That you are a fucking lunatic? Well, it’s my turn motherfucker, I can do lunatic like you would not believe. I take pleasure in it. So I hope you are enjoying 10,000 decibels (possible exaggeration) of Kill 'Em All. I can tell you this, it will bother you far more than it will me because I’m pissed off today and you don’t want to be on the receiving end of the anger I am in possesion of today. Aggressive music at full volume is exactly what I need right now. I have an empty house, and a pizza on the way, and I will ride this noise fest out until you retreat into your crapshack of a house. And next will be Slayer…I hope that offends your delicate “Christian” sensibilities. Assfuck. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/2 "2007-05-31T21:47:58Z")
I’ll bring the booze. And the crowbar for when he comes over to complain… I mean for when we get ready to start on your home renovation. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/3 "2007-05-31T21:50:45Z")
[QUOTE=Projammer] I’ll bring the booze. And the crowbar for when he comes over to complain.. I mean for when we get ready to start on your home renovation. [/QUOTE] Oh no, it’s his home that needs the renovation. Or maybe it just needs his evacuation. Either way. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/4 "2007-05-31T21:52:41Z")
If you really want to piss him off, blast some Deicide. Then go downstairs and slip a copy of the [lyrics](http://www.darklyrics.com/d/deicide.html) under the door. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/5 "2007-05-31T21:54:19Z")
[QUOTE=Lord Ashtar] If you really want to piss him off, blast some Deicide. Then go downstairs and slip a copy of the [lyrics](http://www.darklyrics.com/d/deicide.html) under the door. [/QUOTE] All metal sounds like Satanism to people like him. I’m sure this is working. Now it’s just an endurance competition. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/6 "2007-05-31T21:54:42Z")
[QUOTE=Indygrrl] your crappy, dilapidated house that you have tried to sell three times in a year. [/QUOTE] Well, sure. Who’s going to buy a house next to some 10,000 dB (approx.) metalhead? ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/7 "2007-05-31T21:55:27Z")
When I come back from vacation, I am finding a copy of _Insomnia_, by Faithless, that I have misplaced and bringing it to my apartment for when the upstairs neighbors have that 4 am argument that is over before I can do anything but seethe. I never see them around, don’t want to knock on someone’s door I don’t know at 4 am, and it’s over before I can call the cops. But it’s not over before the bad effects have been achieved. And what’s that bad effect? My neighbors will know. They will know what I’m suffering, my sweets. I’m going to let them know what my problem is. It might take some time in coming. In fact, I won’t let them know the ill effects they are causing me until the next night at 4 am. What’s my problem? What do they do to me? > [@](#): > > I CAN’T GET NO SLEEP! Bwahahahahahaha. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/8 "2007-05-31T21:55:31Z")
Geez just go with Slayer, that way he doesn’t \*have \*to read along to understand the words. Happy medium. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/9 "2007-05-31T21:55:32Z")
Metallica, Slayer and blind (if justified) rage. Why are the great ones always married? 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/10 "2007-05-31T21:56:51Z")
I sure hope you don’t have any other neighbors. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/11 "2007-05-31T21:59:23Z")
[QUOTE=Frank] I sure hope you don’t have any other neighbors. [/QUOTE] Foolproof. All of the other windows in the house are closed and I went out front and you can’t hear a thing. It’s just blaring directly at him while he hammers and saws away. It might be sick, but I do take pleasure in these things, especially when motherfuckers like this have earned it. This was not the week to fuck with Indygrrl. ---
**Author:** ![Jayrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Jayrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayrot)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/12 "2007-05-31T22:37:58Z")
“All right, you wanna get nuts? Come on. Let’s get nuts!” /George Costanza ---
**Author:** ![Duke\_of\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Duke\_of\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke_of_Rat)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/13 "2007-05-31T22:44:23Z")
You need a pulse jet. About 200dB of pure noise. I saw one once, and even knowing it was going to be loud I was amazed at how much louder it was than I thought I could imagine. And directional, point the business end at his house and let 'er rip. Don’t know if they still sell them, this was years ago. Ah, a [Video](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZOUANZJQwE&mode=related&search=) Doesn’t really do justice to the noise level, but even after the first test run you can hear the girl say her ears are hurting. [Another](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P-a577HkRfA&mode=related&search=) And idea of how loud even a [couple of small ones](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1e-Ar7gb4tQ&mode=related&search=) are at a distance. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2007, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/14 "2007-05-31T23:36:55Z")
It took less than an hour for him to stop his hammering and go inside. I think it was the Pantera that finally put him over the edge. Score one for Indygrrl! ---
**Author:** ![Merneith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@Merneith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merneith)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2007, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/15 "2007-06-01T01:25:21Z")
The Violent Femmes are good choice, if you find future applications necessary. Certain types of people crack easily under a short rotation of _Add it Up_, _Kiss Off_, and _Blister in the Sun_. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2007, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/16 "2007-06-01T02:00:12Z")
[QUOTE=Jayrot] “All right, you wanna get nuts? Come on. Let’s get nuts!” /George Costanza [/QUOTE] I’m pretty sure that was Michael Keaton as Bruce Wayne, unless _Seinfeld_ ripped on it. ---
**Author:** ![Rhubarb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/59ef9b/32.png) [@Rhubarb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhubarb)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2007, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/17 "2007-06-01T02:02:35Z")
With that kind of volume, you could give him a new appreciation for The New Christy Minstrels or Jim Nabors. [sub]Really, I was going to suggest Pantera.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2007, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/18 "2007-06-01T03:15:41Z")
Six… six six. The number of the beast! Hell and fire, about to be released! C’mon, do it riiight. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2007, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/19 "2007-06-01T03:50:56Z")
Crank up some Rammstein. It’s not offensive, but it’s loud and also good music! ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2007, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250/20 "2007-06-01T04:35:06Z")
How about Liberace? Bobby Vinton? I’m not feeling the love, here. Insert your own expletive, because it’s the Pit. 😉 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wanna-see-who-can-make-the-most-noise-ill-take-that-bet-motherfucker/406250.md?page=2)